Revealed: Great White shark attacked Mick Fanning in South Africa due intense personal hatred for Australian champ not over color of board!

Science.

It seems like an entire lifetime since Australian champion Michael Eugene Fanning was attacked by a Great White shark whilst surfing a heat in South Africa but it was only 2015.

The greatest moment in World Surf League history? Yes, especially since surfing’s governing body has only been around since 2015. Or maybe 2014. In any case, I image that day fired co-Waterperson of the Year Dirk Ziff’s capitalist spirit. I bet he saw the spike of international wall-to-wall coverage and thought, “People love professional surfing!”

Of course he was wrong and also rude to think about such things as Mick Fanning was struggling with the heavy existential question of “Why.” Why had the shark tangled with him and not Julian Wilson or Jordy Smith or Gabriel Medina? What had he done?

After much wrestling, he deduced that it was the color of his surfboard that led to the terrifying incident and let’s reminisce, briefly, with Time magazine.

Australian surfer Mick Fanning—who made headlines around the world last month after he fended off a shark attack in South Africa’s Jeffreys Bay on live television—was back in competition for the first time since that incident this weekend, but without his trusty yellow surfboard.

After hearing that some divers called the color of his old board “yum yum yellow” because it is thought to attract sharks, Fanning opted to swap his yellow board for blue and black one, Australian news portal news.com.au reports.

Well, a brand-new, just released scientific study directly debunks the “yum yum yellow” theory and let’s turn to everyone’s favorite SciTechDaily for the latest in a provocative article titled: “Fascinating Shark and Ray Vision Evolution Research Reveals Sharks Can’t See Colors.”

In his team’s new study, they have shown that all cartilaginous fishes, similar to the marine mammals, have lost the SWS1 and SWS2 opsin genes. Sharks and rays do contain both rod and cone photoreceptors; however rays possess two cone opsin genes whereas sharks have only one cone. Sharks therefore were found to have lost the ability to see colors.

“Furthermore, we provided measurements of the spectral characteristics of the visual pigments expressed in nine species of ray and two species of shark,” said Hart. “We can now confirm that all the shark species studied to date appear to be cone monochromats but report that in different species the single cone opsin may be of either the LWS or the RH2 class of opsins.”

“Broadly speaking, color discrimination may be useful for behaviors such as prey detection, predator avoidance, and mate choice. Given that many ray species spend considerable periods of time resting on or partially buried in the substrate, color vision may instead aid in the detection of approaching overhead predators through either enhancement of visual contrast or elimination of achromatic flicker.”

So, since sharks can’t see colors it can only mean that the Great White attacked Mick Fanning there in South Africa due an intense personal hatred.

What had Mick done?

How should he now feel?

Is there a way for the World Surf fLeague to further monetize?

More as the story develops.