“If you can get up out of your bed in the morning from laying down to standing on land, I tell you what, you can get up on a surfboard.”
A week ago, Kelly Slater blocked BeachGrit and me on Instagram and my whole world began to crumble. How could I know what the world’s greatest surfer was doing? What he thought about this or that? Depression washed in like a flood, rotting my very foundation, plaster falling off the walls in sickening thuds.
How could I continue to call my self a surf journalist?
Well, the sun also rises and the very next day I rolled out of bed feeling inspired. Eyes opened. Seeing things fresh through the holes in my world’s walls, the massive visage of the World’s Greatest Surfer no longer blocking my view.
There are other surfers out there, surfers with more titles and accolades to whom I’d been blind.
Surfers like 15 x World Champion surfer Zane Schweitzer… 15 x World Champion (4 x more World Championships than Kelly Slater)… who just happens to be teaching remote surf lessons during quarantine and using Miss Hawaii 2018 as his model.
Unbelievable? Let’s bend our ears and listen.
“Surfing itself is something that comes with a few simple steps that I can share with you right here, right now,” Schweitzer said.
And just like that my cyber surf lesson begins.
“This is Kim, she’s Miss Hawaii here in 2018. Actually our first date was surfing and now she is a very avid surfer. She’s like a prime example and gonna be our model today to help you guys understand our surf tips,” Schweitzer said.
First up — paddling.
“We’re gonna keep our head arched and reach out with forward with our hands paddling and that’s step No. 1,” Schweitzer said.
Now the hardest part, the pop-up.
“Now, step No. 2. We’re gonna lift up nice and tall, we’re going to bring our back knee under our hips, then we’re gonna bring our front foot forward under the chest. Now comes the fun part, twist your hips, plant your back foot from knee to the foot and lift,” Schweitzer said.
Finally the key to it all — balance.
“If you can get up out of your bed in the morning from laying down to standing on land, I tell you what, you can get up on a surfboard,” Schweitzer said.
Wonderful and if your partner would like a surf lesson you can order it for him/her here but before you go can I ask a quick few questions?
How’s Kelly doing? Does he look happy? Healthy? Is he still on Australia’s Gold Coast or has he fled?
Any new, exiting developments with Outerknown? Breitling?
Purps?
Is he eating well?
Using sunscreen?
Taking care of his emotional health?
You’ll let me know, yes?