"I don't like the odds of there being many 'responsible surfers' out there."
And who could have ever guessed, at the very beginning of 2020 when it was revealed that a Chinese man either ate, or fiddled with, a bat and unleashed a heretofore unknown disease into the world that surfers and surfing would end up center stage?
Truth is stranger than fiction, I suppose, but here we are with surfers and surfing dominating the debate over responsible behavior in the time of Coronavirus. New York Times features of Huntington Beach protests. Nightly news broadcasts of “crowded” lineups from Bondi to The Wedge.
Op-eds flying back and forth.
Yesterday, for example, you read here the wonderful story of Transhumanist Zoltan who dared surf in a nearby town. A small act of defiance that should be understood and applauded by surfers everywhere?
I would have thought, but this pandemic has laid bare who we really are. Dirty, rat fink snitches and Zoltan caught hell on social media with many surfers viciously criticizing his decision, some even imagining that Bolinas, California, a stone’s throw from San Francisco, is “secret.”
Well, as things work, the sensible surf media came swinging in to condemn Transhumanist souls yearning to surf free and shall we read a snippet from Stab magazine?
Examples like the above are obviously hypothetical, but I know several individuals who have driven either south or north of Sydney since the beach closures, one of which later had a Covid scare. In theory, local beach openings are fine, and a good way for people to exercise while keeping their distance, but the reality is much trickier; a point which the author of the Times article strangely seems to agree with. “[Q]uarantine rules must apply to everyone or the plan to flatten the curve doesn’t work.” A strange point considering he goes on to argue “responsible surfers” should be granted the rights to paddle out, get tubbed (read: nosedive for most of us), and head home. But with surfers spruiking 5G conspiracy theories online and surf media outlets referring to lockdown proponents as “the Gestapo”, I don’t like the odds of there being many “responsible surfers” out there.
Wait, surf media outlets referring to lockdown proponents as “the Gestapo?” Well that’s li’l ol’ BeachGrit. Maybe our suspicion of draconian laws and newly empowered enforcers, our wondering if sitting out in the ocean ain’t the worst thing ever, our questioning of wholesale trash-canned liberty, our not hopping right up into the seat of judgment in order to define “responsibility” is only born from the fact that we haven’t had “Covid scares.”
Don’t you either have the disease or not?
Is there some middle way I’m missing?
Whichever the case, what percentage of surfers, worldwide, do you think are on Team Tudor vs. Team Skindog?
Months ago, when Ken “Skindog” Collins posted on Instagram that surfers should observe “stay-at-home” rules and Joel Tudor made fun, the battle lines were drawn.
Initially, I thought surfers would break 70 – 30 for Tudor. I understand, now, that it is a solid 85 – 15 for Skinny.
Wild.
Absolutely wild what self-righteous, spineless little tattle-tales we are.
Chris Dixon and Frank: please email [email protected] from the address you'd like your BeachGrit login on.
Commented on Disqus? Log out, tap the Disqus button, and your old name and comments come back. The box is ours.
Your comments are still here. Every one of them.
Twelve years of BeachGrit comments came across from Disqus. Connect and we will show you how many are yours. We get your username, nothing else.
Connect Disqus to reveal.
What were you doing at sea?
I’m glad I haven’t been here in a while. Some MAGA level bullshit here.
The law only has eyes for me!
forget about taking sides… just know you’re about to scroll through some of the most intense comments here in quite some time…
At least there will be no more green energy arguments anymore cause they’ve been exposed as blacker than coal.
The worst thing is realizing how dumb ass people are and how smart the billionaires are
MMA is gay
to seek your inner flower
self punching may heal
A haiku, by John Non John
I’ve heard from numerous sources that the bat-fiddle incident was orchestrated by a woman. Better give credit where credit is due in these feminist/metoo times.
*Pan-asian fusion
Probably.
BG is in good company calling out the Gestapo. Along with all those orange tinted, camo loving zombie warriors and their beloved semi-automatic weapons. Who could have guessed that so many surfer tans are as fake as their ability to grasp basic maths, science and sense of humanity?
This comment brought to you by Pfizer.
We care about YOU!!!
Fuck Pfizer. But i do feel for YOU. When the crackpots become part of the established political view, their hatred of the establishments makes things go wonky. But never mind, you’ll always have your dicks to keep you feeling loved.
Nah, they still read it and watch the videos.
No we don’t.
It’s crap run and written by fuckwits, and heaps of us have been banned from there for being honest about what a bunch of shit it is…
True. I was banned a couple years ago and never pay ’em a visit.
So what’s your alternative? Models are never going to be entirely accurate when you have a huge sparsity of data, and realistically some of the models have been quite accurate for countries which have not observed strict social distancing (i.e., ‘Merica)
Ohhhh riiight
Never heard that one before
Have heard it in relation to wanking though, similar to choking the chicken…
Their not interested mate.
Fuken scared of their own shadows
it is shut down. no surfing allowed. because they did not shut down in the first place shit started getting bad
Admittedly I’ve never actually seen a bat, just always presumed they were heaps smaller than chickens…
Never? Arent you a outside person? They dont live in your area?
They have radical flight patterns, kinda like out of control swallows, at twilight look for them (dark fluttering squares) darting after insects. Ugly little faces but weird teeny “paws” at the end of their wings that they climb o And SONAR..how weird is that. Major eaters of insects, they love termites when they hatch.
I’m kind of a bird nut, I realize. Although I guess they arent birds.
Don’t think we have them in the area I live.
Actually, now I remember properly, I’ve seen them years ago in Bali and they were very small like a swallow
The one like three years ago? Pfft.
I don’t think they’re too concerned what the beachgrit commentariat thinks about their content that they all watch/read regardless.
Anyway, that’s beside my point, if Chas is going to go around spouting shit I’d like to see him at least back it up. Especially when he goes as far to reference an article that diminishes his little ‘coronavirus hot take’ clickbaits.
First off, probably 1/16 of our traffic ever heads to Stab, judging by numbers, but more importantly… will you feel embarrassed when all this is over or will your nanny state loving heart beat to the rhythm of “better safe than sorry?”
“Better safe than sorry” might be an idiom that rings true for people in countries like Australia where business and public places are gradually reopening after weeks of <10 new cases per day—all of which is thanks to strict lockdowns. But I don’t think the word “safe” will be entering any sensible American’s vocabulary as you add 20,000 new cases and 1,000 deaths per day.
The tripe you write on here is no more informative than a high-school dropout sharing his 5G conspiracy theories on Tik Tok.
Yeah? Is your crack team on the ground here documenting each and every of the new cases and deaths? There is an honest debate around all of these numbers. To pretend that what you spew is hard-cold fact is more naive than any tripe I write here or anywhere!
You’re right, there is honest debate. In fact, most think the numbers are significantly higher due to a lack of adequate testing. What are you suggesting, that the trucks full of dead bodies are lies?
I think stories featuring trucks “full” of dead bodies get clicks. I also know that many mortuaries in and around NY refuse to take bodies of those listed having died from Coronavirus… itself problematic. You see Belgium basically listing everyone who dies as a Covid death whether they’ve been tested or not? So, yes, there are some refrigerated trucks around with bodies but not because there are just too many bodies to keep up with.
We’re not talking about Belgium here, Chas. We’re talking about the country where you live. The country with the most mortalities and the highest infection rate in the world. If you’re so well informed, tell me, what do you think the real count is like and how much of a walk in the park the patient influx is to deal with in cities like New York.
I don’t pretend to know. I also don’t take complete stock in numbers that get revised wildly downward regularly.
I guess we’ll just wait and see what the numbers look like a in a few months.
You can be skeptical, but promoting the re-opening of society at large isn’t reasonable skepticism, it’s just outright denial about how viruses spread.
Can you reframe in Auspol terms for me? I stopped caring about American politics when the comp came down to two demented old white men.
Whites are the worst!
Lil Mikey C: “Yo Jake. I gotta little job for ya”.
Jake E : “Sure boss, what’s shakin`?”
Mikey C : “Heya paesano, you know dose guys ova there at Beach Crap? Da ones dats always making funs of us?”
Jake E : “Sure boss, they’re always jokin at us huh? I know da ones”.
Mikey C : “Well you goes ova there and I want you to ruffle Chas’s feathers, ya know, get under his skin a little bit”.
Jake E : “You figure I should take old Vido wit me? He’ll make em a nice pair of cement shoes”
Mikey C : “Nah, jus’ pinch his tits for now, let’s see how it goes from there”
Jake E : “oh boyo boy yuzza wuzza dingo dogs …. Ima better writer than Hemingway huh boss huh?”
But you’d be interested if it was a race of demented old ‘men of color’ hence you are of Stab.
No, I’d be interested if there was someone with a shred of intelligence (i.e., Bernie). Identity politics has nothing to do with it.
ah , no the plan is to quarantine to slow the spread , get on top of the virus , buy some time so we can get vaccines/treatments …interesting to know that mostly old people and blacks are the main casualties ……..
and //where the fuck did you read that quarantine will cause 135 m people to die of malnutrition?
2 million children die of starvation every year. how many do you think will die this year with so many people out of work?
You quarantine the sick, vulnerable and aged; not the others. Like what has always been done. Sweden.
And yes Chas, there is something you’re missing. The fact that the majority of people infected don’t know that they’re infected and will more readily spread the virus — this is especially true in your country with pathetic testing rates.
If you want to give a proper response to the piece I’m happy to read it, but at this stage you just seem happy someone noticed your incessant use of the word ‘gestapo’.
Should we get tested for every disease?
Or just be a bit more hygenic.
Or just hide in your closet till Jake gives the all clear
Whenever the fuk that is
sack of flour inside a bubble… all safe bexy
So your sayin
Let’s go surfin now
Every dikheads learning how.
Come and get diseased with me.?
Hypochondriac that I am, I loathe your last two lines.
On levels.
and about Jake’s closet?…..
He’s the Stab guy?
He sounds beyond hypochondria.
People still fuk regardless of disease.
It’s very popular actually
No, you should listen to the epidemiologists who spend their time researching and studying the transmission of zoonotic diseases, such as novel-coronavirus, and stop arguing about lockdowns in the comment section of a surfing site.
No wukas
What about next time?
Under the tables again?
chickenshit conformist
Oh no! I believe in scientific research. How uncool of me!
where is the science? You are just repeating what you have been told. You cant back up your fear mongering with evidence. Science requires evidence, remember?
Go and read one of the numerous reports from journals like Nature, Science, or the numerous reputable media orgs which report them. I’m not going to baby you through the fucking process
Seriously … looking for logic here?
bullshit. There is no evidence, thats why cant cite anything.
What.
our existestence is absurd. learn to laugh at it or you will spend your life frustrated.
you take yourself too seriously. you are missing the point of Beachgrit.
That’s a great comment
.we ain’t forever
No, you do not believe in scientific research, and obviously don’t even understand the most basic fundamentals that govern it. Do yourself a favor, and stick with what you know: crafting poorly written surfing articles on a website that nobody gives a solitary fuck about. Every time you show up here, you accomplish nothing but making a fool of yourself.
I’m a research assistant in cognitive science, I dare say I have more hands on experience with science (in particular, modelling) than anyone spouting nonsense here.
I write for Stab once a week because believe it or not I still enjoy surfing and it’s certainly a lot more noble to write for than this sycophantic fuck fest.
Oh hell, Jake. A research assistant in cognitive science? Well, I have my master’s degree in Applied Linguistics. We’re almost equally qualified (edge to me) to speak authoritatively on the Coronavirus Pandemic of ’19-’20.
I’m not speaking authoritatively am I Chas? I’m just listening to the advice of people who spend their lives in these fields. Meanwhile, you’re out there carrying on like the Alex Jones of surfing
You’re not speaking authoritatively? Well that’s not true. I get that you’re repeating positions of sources you trust but, my goodness, the “authorities” in this case have blown it so badly it strains credibility to the very max. For you not to have a modicum of doubt is… strange.
If you spent less time writing uninformed, narrow-minded articles and more time reading maybe you’d realise that isn’t quite the case. While there’s no doubt government’s have made mistakes throughout this, those who have adhered the closest to expert advice are starting to see the light at the end of this tunnel.
What do you think the path forward is? Re-opening parks, business and all to let the virus do it’s work and healthcare workers suffer the consequences.
So being skeptical of how this whole mess has been handled makes me narrow minded and uninformed? Ok. The path forward is to let the human body work. Did you know there is plenty of other science out there that basically says we fucked our immune systems by the way we’ve handled this? That, quite literally, the worst thing we could have done is to hide indoors away from each other. Also, what is your favorite Benny Mussolini quote?
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Oooo, big boy found my linkedin! What a find.
pretty slim CV for a self aggrandizing prick
Do you think anyone outside real estate agents and biz execs use LinkedIn seriously? It hasn’t been updated in three years ha.
Bonus points if you scour the web and find some photos of me boogin’ from five years ago too. If you’re going to walk the ad hominem path you may as well fully commit.
The thing is, you don’t believe in data. You believe in prognostications by terribly flawed computer models and fools like Fauci and Birx who every week tell a different story. Fauci was saying as late as Feb. there was no need to restrict travel or do anything different. A few weeks later it was 2 million will die….lock everybody up! Rule by fools.
There’s not much point arguing with GOATS. Their inspiration comes from a fear and hatred that can’t be beaten. Imagine not being able to understand science and having to deal with conspiracy’s around every corner.
Like Fauci? How many times has he been wrong in the past 4 months?
Dude has been wrong about everything.
You are such an idiot. ‘Epidemiologists’. A big title\word which if correctly defined would mean ‘one who makes predictions what never coincide reality.’ If epidemiologists were paid based on his accurate assessments, they would all be homeless.
Rip into the cunt. He a bad man.
Definitely need some good content.
Must be tuff.
Or at least wants the facade of being one. I don’t usually place god-fearing surf journo’s on my list of ‘bad men’.
Oh the ones who fear God are the ones you really have to look out for. Or are the lessons of the recent past already lost on you?
Why? Because religious zealots are the ones spreading misinformation en masse.
Actually no. Because belief is a dangerous thing. My goodness, you’re a soft cock.
What’s my erectile dysfunction got to do with this?
5G.
Good to see you’ve given up on the other thread and stuck to your specialty: classic quips.
Oh I haven’t given up. Look below! Also don’t think for one second you’re not a zealot. Your religion is just smug poorly understood scientific rationalism with a sprinkling of poorly defined Marxism.
Ahhh I was unaware that researchers and modellers around the world (the one’s whose views I’m propagating) had a poor understanding of their own discipline. And what the fuck does Marxism, or any economic philosophy for that matter, have to do with what we’re talking about.
Anyway Chas, a pleasure as always typing into the void, nice to see you’re as averse to dissenting opinions as the organisations (i.e., the WSL) you claim to hate.
Oh you’re certainly joking now. As averse to dissenting opinions? We were having a little debate, I thought. Did you get hurt feelings?
Can we just agree that you’re Vichy?
Nah, I’m just the dude that wrote the article you cited.
Cited or ridiculed? Big diff.
Ridiculed because Chas couldn’t conjure up one idea what ‘covid scare’ could possibly mean? Like the obvious one of having close contact with a confirmed case…
Also, who is to define this “responsibility?” Politicians? Doctors? Law enforcement? Stab?
An epic thread between you and Jake Embreyo. So, I was thinking about what the exchange reminded me of. Then it hit me. Christian Fletcher and Mikey C. You reprising the role of Christian. Embreyo the cognitive dissident.
Now I’m thinking it’d be great to produce an audio version using one of those text-to-speak app thingamajigs. I think there’s voice options. One speaking your comments. Another for Embreyo.
Then post it here. BG owns his comments now so you shouldn’t encounter publishing obstacles or objection from him that would be prohibitive. Do it! It would be funny. And Anti-Depressive.
Christian vs Mikey C was great.
Does this count as a citation for my h-index? I’d rather it not.