Strange days.
Though did you ever see the film Strange Days starring a younger Ralph Fiennes, Angela Bassett, Juliette Lewis, Vince D’Onofrio etc? It wasn’t the best movie ever made, of course, but a semi-fun dystopian look at the near future. Similar to Back to the Future II.
Escape from L.A.
Videodrome.
And, my goodness, our apocalyptic future looked so grim but exciting back then. Everything a grey + neon swirl with mini-CDs as currency. We are living in it now, of course, and it is neither grey nor neon just the same colors as always, with the mini-CD technology vanishing too quickly and… Oh, I don’t know. If I’m being honest very disappointing.
Sure, there the petrodollar’s collapse is imminent and that will lead to a global economic crash, a Chinese-crafted disease is ripping through immuno-compromised populations and the Great White shark has vacated once-fertile False Bay in South Africa but where did they go?
According to Australia’s ABC news:
Only a few years ago, scientists estimated there were between 300 and 500 great white sharks in South Africa’s False Bay. Now, they have completely disappeared.
While local surfers might have relaxed, the absence of the apex predators is alarming to scientists, and the lucrative industries that rely on their presence.
“I’ve spent my entire life in the field watching these animals on a daily basis,” local cage dive operator and wildlife photographer Chris Fallows says.
“When the waters go quiet, both above and below the surface, and these predators are not there, it sounds huge alarm bells.”
Etc.
Etc.
Theory.
Theory until we get to…
“Flake” has long been a staple in Australian diets, but overfishing of gummy and school shark populations led to protection of the two species in our waters in the early 1990s.
In order to meet demand, Australia began importing “flake”, mostly from New Zealand and, more recently, from South Africa.
Australia’s seafood labelling laws require that any fresh or frozen fish sold must be labelled with the country of origin, but once the seafood is cooked, these laws no longer apply.
In many cases, it is impossible to know where or how the fish you’re eating at your local cafe, restaurant or fish and chips shop was caught.
“Australians commonly refer to shark meat as ‘flake’, but it can be sold as ‘pearl fillet’, it can be sold as ‘boneless fillet’ and it can be sold as ‘monkfish’. There’s no legal obligation to actually call it what it is,” Dr Guida says.
With 70 per cent of the seafood we consume in Australia coming from overseas, this poses significant challenges to traceability and accountability, disempowers consumers and impacts Australia’s reputation as a leader in sustainability.
I suppose that’s a sort of dystopian vision I can really get behind. Disturbing, certainly. Very grim but also exciting?
Oh, I don’t know.
These are strange days.
Crock of shit. Gummy shark is the only species authorised to be sold as flake in Australia. And there are plenty of sevengills in False Bay for the whites to eat.
Maybe they just got sick of being trolled with fake seals?
You’re a well paid scientist, you only talk in facts
You know you’re always right
‘Cause you know how to prove it, step-by-step
PhD to show you’re smart
with textbook formulas
But you’re half full of shit,
just like CNN.
You want some flake to go with that chup there bro?
Peruvian?
Hard to tell how flakey sharks are. Like they just disappeared from False Bay.
Also, what happened to the loyal following of shark lifesavers? They were funny.
It was amazing how they manifested out of nowhere. After Derek’s search term article revealing dark truths, I wonder what search terms the shark lifesavers entered to send them to our shoreline.
Last month Australia followed the lead of their warmest friend, The United States, in calling for an international investigation into the origin of the Wuhan Wheeze What’s App With That Flu. The ChiComs were insulted, peeved and thoroughly taken aback by the Aussies’ boldness. “Don’t they know their place” one CCP official muttered while squatting on his ChiComposting toilet. Thw ChiComs suggested Australia change their tune, or face economic consequence.
Theories have shifted away from the wet market theory and focus is now centering upon the Wuhan Lab.
Earlier this week the Five Eyes, an intelligence alliance between United Kingdom, USA, Canada, Australia and New Zealand issued a report stating that intelligence gathered pointed more and more to the theory that the Wuhan Wheeze Wha-Wha-What the Fuck Flu originated in the Wuhan Lab.
However, in a departure from the Five Eyes intelligence alliance, Australia stated in the report that it was only a 5% chance the Wuhan Wheeze originated in the Wuhan Lab.
Be bold Australia. No sharks is China’s fault too. Just say it. Say it!
At the place I surf, we sometimes see guys diving for green lips.
A few years ago we pull up and there are 2 vans with Chinese acting like they do in what was once a quiet dead end street.
When we got out we spoke to a a diver going in. He said he was under one time and started to hear a bunch of jet skis. They were working in teams to clean the place the fuck out.
Just recently there is call to stop the catching of the spider crabs molting in the bay.
Guess who? They are fucking clearing the place out. From what I read, the taste like mud, but are used in crab soup.
“I thought that living in a dystopian hellhole would be a lot more edgy!” -unknown