Surf world in meltdown as world champs and pivotal industry figures line up to claim a ride by Australian Laura Enever as biggest paddle-in wave by a woman ever, “That’s a new world record WSL!”

"How do we get ourselves out of this fix? Sunset ... we can't lose that beach. It is like losing part of Waikiki Beach."

WSL bingo for the day consisted of various iterations of sand on the reef, bumps on the horizon (which rarely materialised), Apple watches, shaper rankings, and the word “sendy”.

"I hope they figure it out!"

Getting tasered creates the sensation of having your brain shaken "like a peanut in a jar" and with "bees crawling through your skin."

"I no longer have any goals when it comes to surfing my only goal is to get my mind and health back to 100%…"

"Tati West's surfing at Pipe confounds me. I imagined that she would be good at surfing steep reefs. But somehow, she is not. At last year’s Pipe comp, she mostly went straight."