And how this noted big-waver came to save a Portuguese fishing village…
It is rare when the civilian world jumps into the surf pool and makes a ripple that we don’t snicker at.
Surf, like combat and birthing a child, can only be understood when sleeves are rolled up and fingers are buried into the rind.
It has to be lived through years of torture punctuated by minor successes to be understood.
But then, and rarely, there’s a story that reveals a surfer, a wave, or both, like never before.
This Smithsonian article from 2018 (the mag was gifted by a retired uncle whose new hobby was permanently borrowing ‘free’ magazines from old barber shops and dentist offices), brings light to the darker corners of the Garrett McNamara and Nazaré square.
Garrett, who is fifty-two, is often overlooked by surf media. Could be the Mercedes drip or the Anderson Cooper jet ski drive-by.
But this article endears him to the reader.
Highlights include Garrett’s upbringing with his mother who was searching for answers in communes and cults. Mammy took Garrett to Central America where her then-partner Luis kicked her in the head till she was bloody and unconscious with five-year-old Garrett as a witness.
Another details Garrett being left with a peasant farmer in Guatemala who adopted him for some time.
It describes their time in California when Garrett’s mammy, now following the Christ Family christian cult which was led by a man who called himself ‘Jesus Christ Lightning Amen,’ took all their possessions, put them in a pile and lit them on fire.
They were left with bedsheets that became their robes with rope for a belt.
Garrett describes the incident as “one of the worst humiliations of my life.”
He tried to hide in an alley but school friends saw him.
The dark history of Nazaré (named after the place of Jesus’ birth, Nazareth) will similarly excite.
It tells how the town withered into near-extinction after once being a prosperous fishing village.
Fishermen who set out never returned.
Disappeared.
Thrown into the cliffs by giant waves while trying to bring their catches to land.
It also tells how the widows of the lost fisherman now line the streets, quiet and sullen, in black dresses.
And, how Dino Casimiro, a local who knew the town was in despair, sent an email to Garrett to explore the wave in hopes that it would bring tourism and life back to the sequestered village.
Get a piece of the Smithsonian story here.
yeah, I needed a Terence reminder. Kinda get the big picture view.
Garrett, who is fifty-two, is often overlooked by surf media. Could be the Mercedes drip or the Anderson Cooper jet ski drive-by.
I think it’s because of the Anderson Cooper drive- by for sure!
Can we get Bethany Hamilton a wildcard?
A) It’s the better story.
B) More importantly…she can surf the shit out of it.
haha no pun intended
Thanks! Meanwhile Chas is sipping wine in a Beverly Hills hotel. Something seems a little off here. Equality etc.
Can see the vee neck tan line even better.
Jen, can you please do an article on the women competing at chopes..with a breakdown of how you expect each surfer to deal with it. Interested on your thoughts, and others on the issue.
Pretty sure this McNamara bloke ain’t no shrinking violet, most probably quite the opposite, seems fairly high up in the self promotion stakes…
There’s a whole museum devoted to him at nazare. And you’d think if everyone kept dying because the waves were big that they’d just wait for the swell to drop before fishing again. It’s literally not rocket science.
Bring back Bex !
Down – Hahahaha
That was me !
Suck it bexy !
He’d surely have something good to say about this McNamara blokes mum though hahaha
Probably, But It’s the other 65 comments…
You were his voice of reason Negs, he must be issuing fatwa’s irl now!
To be fair to Bex he stuck to his guns and never listened to a word I said.
Is Bex gone? Or just put in the sin bin for a bit?
The latter.
Me too – I’ve just dropped my first ever downvote. This place is finally habitable again!!
First ever downvote by me too! Fuck that weird cunt.
How could you not be a fan of Lightning Bolt Jesus…
This one rules !
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
This is fantastic
I only fuck with
Haiku and leave the rest to
People who can write
But here’s a good one from old Phil. Enjoy!
They fuck you up, your mum and dad.
They may not mean to, but they do.
They fill you with the faults they had
And add some extra, just for you.
But they were fucked up in their turn
By fools in old-style hats and coats,
Who half the time were soppy-stern
And half at one another’s throats.
Man hands on misery to man.
It deepens like a coastal shelf.
Get out as early as you can,
And don’t have any kids yourself.
Philip Larkin, High Windows
Your first three lines or DR’s paragraphs are great. Nailed it amigo. Rest was great, but those lines set your stage. !!!
I guess GM is a member of the “fucked up childhood made me what I am today club”. Me too.
Aren’t we all…..
Much better than the “I’m fucked up because of my parents and can’t take responsibility for my life” club.
I have my own mother and humiliation story…more embarrassment, i shall tell of my ordeal anyway
It was perhaps a dozen years ago, though these type of experiences tend to make it feel like it was
but yesterday
I was 4 months into a relationship with a girl I believed at the time, to be the love of my life.
Let’s just say now, Kim k, i feel your pain
So i was teaching her to surf, getting some nice hand on ass action, as you do, and things started getting out of hand. It was a family rated show, so we thought it best to take things back to the privacy of my home…about a 15 minute drive away.
15 minutes was too long for my impulsive little friend, so she unwraps the towel from around my waist, unbuckles her seatbelt, and starts up with some fellacial action.
Bunny hopping my way home, I finally pull in to my street…
My mum, who had obviously come to visit unannounced, as is her way, is driving towards me in the opposite direction. My girlfriends face firmly in my lap…my eyes nearly popping out…i manage to say…just keep your head down!
I discovered later that pretty much every time she was told to do something, she would do the opposite…but this fact was unbeknownst to me at the time
So just as we are approaching my mums car, she pops up and looks out over the steering wheel
We both gave mum a friendly wave…we have never spoken of it.
You may want to check the meaning of Humiliation.
LOL
Was dad proud ..??…
Getting a blow job from a real live girl as a young man is not humiliation story.
Try getting busted by the whole family on the intercom having a wank in the out house is another story. Dad couldn’t even look at me while Mum naively asked me what I was up too?
You had an intercom in the outhouse?
Seems NEGS was groomed from a young age to deal with shitters.
Sleepout might be a better word, my family not that into Plumbing…
My dad just sold 20 feet of old cast iron radiators accumulated over the years from old jobs…. copper 3/4 male adapters included!!!! He was very excited….
Thanks for posting, Smithsonian article was interesting read I likely not see but for your post.
Thanks for the summary, now I don’t need to read it (not that I would’ve!)!! Now I can spend more time reading pointless shark articles and helping Derek formalize the curriculum for his Dingo inspired Be a Surf Website Owner/Writer!: Editing and Article Writing Tutorial/Lesson. While he can’t teach you everything, here is something to give you a start…
Editing
Step 1. Read several unsolicited articles.
Step 2. Decide to publish the few halfway decent ones you get, unless it’s controversial, then publish no matter what.
Step 3. Get back to people you’re going to publish. If not publishing theirs, get back to them in a week.
Step 4. Before posting said articles, delete every comma in them and turn every sentence into its own paragraph.
Step 5. Post.
Writing
Step 1. Have something to write about.
Step 2. Find your subject:
-If you find a video from Mason Ho or Luke Davis, come up with a homoerotic title for your summary of the vid and post.
-If about a surf event or surf personality, call up Warshaw and ask him about [insert event/person’s] place in surf history, transcribing the interview word for word. Post. Bonus points for made up anecdotes and flawed histories.
-If writing about board design, call Fat Biolos… I mean, Matt. Transcribe the interview, heavily editing Fat’s answers so that he actually makes sense. Post.
-If you want to interview someone who seems unlikeable and punchable, interview Fat Biolos again. Just let him talk, with every answer he becomes more punchable.
I like how Matt’s board design has continually followed the trajectory of his life and continues to just get shorter, thicker and wider with less importance given to performance. If his boards could have a cranky shit personality I’m sure he would shape that into them.
Outstanding.
“Surf, like combat and birthing a child, can only be understood when sleeves are rolled up and fingers are buried into the rind.”
Excellent simile my friend.