Coming soon!
Just two days ago, we learned here of the heartbreaking scuttling of an exciting indoor wave pool set to be built in Niagara there in upstate New York. Very sad as it would have complimented the thrill of brave men and women pitching themselves over the region’s iconic waterfalls nicely.
Our own Ricky Spanish wondered aloud in the comments,”What’s the current scrapped wave pool project count? It’s gotta be getting up there.”
And one would imagine it is what with Covid-19 wreaking theoretical havoc on global economies and Surf Ranch hosting an an extremely snoozy Rumble.
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is Edinburgh, Scotland and its proposed Wavegarden just receiving planning permission, keeping it on track to open in 2022!
Per the announcement from Wavegarden Scotland, “Tartan Leisure Ltd, developers of Scotland’s first artificial surf park, Wavegarden Scotland, received planning permission today. Permission includes the HUB complex which will provide food, retail, changing and leisure facilities, together with overnight accommodation.”
Very cool except I don’t know if I love love the American Southwest meets Puerto Rico vibe especially not when this sort of pointy stick/blood motif would have fit so well.
It’s rude for me to even bring up, though, and congratulations to Chazz Michael Michaels and all his Scotsmen who will soon be able to surf artificially on their own lands instead of Wales or wherever the other Wavegarden is.
Remember, you can take their lives, but you can never take their freedom.
I do like a good artists impression and have been missing since webber went quiet. with how transparent and glassy it is, it does look like one of those perfect 2 inch lagoon runners that’s gets you thinking it would perhaps be cool to be an ant.
Has beachgrit replaced shark stories, with fucked up wave pool stories
Eeeeewwww!
What has the world come to when BeachGrit is my only trusted knowledge source.
Get down here now cunts!
The surf is absolutely
Fun, fresh efficient!
How many “authors” on the BG Board of directors?
And narry one fucking attempt to reference Irvine Welsh.
Ken what ah means, likes?
he’s a cunt, that’s why
Being a cunt has never been a barrier to entry around here.
Tartan Leisure Ltd – no doubt a Wilko wetty collab to launch the pond is being brewed up.
As I’ve said before, this will mainly be populated by posh gits who’ve gone on ‘gap years’ and reckon they’re all that due to a few lessons in Australia. Fucking Edinburgh.
Sounds like you have identified the soft core of The Inertia’s main audience. Imagine all the Patagonia jackets lined up waiting to get in.
no it will not. it will be populated by geordies and chavs. stag and hen party buses packed and ready
To robbery, slaughter, plunder, they give the lying name of empire; they make a solitude and call it peace.
Calgacus (a chieftain of the Caledonian Confederacy who fought the Roman army of Gnaeus Julius Agricola at the Battle of Mons Graupius in northern Scotland in AD 83 or 84.)
Ps would you call a decent wave at a Scottish wave pool a McNugget ?
I’m glad we have a LongTom and not a Longshanks.
Shearers goota have a bit of fkn Scott, he s got that beat down but irrepressible will get the job done vibe..
Nah ya wouldne..
Miss opportunity to say ‘you may take their waves’ instead of lives. BLEW IT
will it have a round a bout ?
Fucking wavepools.
Fucking Edinburgh.
Fucking surfing.
From where do you hail? Keep the heid!!
Glasgow born, west coast raised, now a committed highlander.
We are really missing the place, mainly due to the retardation of Aus. culture.
I swear cunts are getting dumber round the way CB. Darby St was shoulder to shoulder around lunch yesty. I wanted a coffee but didn’t like the look of it all.
If I move over like that Irishman in Braveheart can we do some revolting together?
Oh I would think so. But you’d need to tone down that accent and start dressing like a man rather than some sort of post punk space duke.
Again, a tear in my eye with that. I’m going to have “post punk space duke” on my business card whenever I get business cards.
That is outstanding !
Unnervingly accurate.
Apparently my family owns quite the swathe of peat bog in the highlands, never been keen to visit though..
Do you have the Family Crest hanging somewhere chill or loud n proud?
Neither. Though the motto is tattooed shoulder to shoulder across my chest!
Fuck ours would barely cover the next shout..
What is it?
Mine’s “Inspire To Victory”. My clan were mainly concerned with the songs and poetry of fighting. Seemed relevant.
“Sola Virtus Nobilitat”.
Fierce, loyal , not too smart but good cunce..
I thought it was “California? Never Been!”
And never going.
I love how you see that as the greatest shade you can throw, Ben. As if California is the centre of the universe! Hilarious.
feck off out of the highlands ya Glaswegian cunt
I’ve been here 13 years, so get yourself right to fuck. And I’m only Glaswegian in the sense that I was born in a hospital there.
Once again – get fucked.
Pffft 13 YEARS. Once a Glaswegian always a Glaswegian dangleberry
And you don’t even live here so pipe down.
Dinnae fasch yerself. You’ve been in a room too long.
Oh, I’m sorry! If only you’d come out with some pish vernacular earlier!
That’s me put right in my place.
ffs ya sook. it’s some light ribbing and you’re throwing a tantrum.
Yeah well, things are pretty sensitive up north right now with the influx of tourists since lockdown ended. It’s a real problem. I care about the land and I care about my home. I don’t like to see it abused. I might not be a born and bred highlander, but I feel like one. And my kids are. Land issues, reform or otherwise, will always raise my blood.
Secondly, I’ve never been Glaswegian. And I’m not that fond of Glasgow or its people.
Sorry to hear that. I am all for every1 sticking to their own turf for a while.
Aye! I’ve got Scottish heritage so I’ve always wanted to go there.
I feel you don’t really mean this.
I really do.
Each one a facade that promises much but delivers nothing.
Except for Edinburgh and surfing which both deliver-ish beer.
Edinburgh delivers private schoolboys and pissed politicians.
Surfing delivers the highest concentration of kooks and losers outside of ultimate frisbee.
Haggis.
One word…midgies.
Good luck catching the glass at dawn or dusk.
Huh. Edinburgh is a beautiful town full of many ornate spires and tiny winding streets. Be a real shame to bring that Margaritaville schlock to such a serious, thinking person’s town.
Problem is it’s already overrun by the English.
bullshit
Reminds me of that time in Ireland when I was talking to my friend Finlay and his mom at the pub and their friend Colin ran in, tears streaming down his face. We all asked what was wrong and he told Finaly and his mom “I have terrible news for you. It’s about Calum.” (Calum was their brother/son.) “What happened!” “Well, as you know we all went to tour the Guinness plant today. Well during the tour Calum fell in a vat of beer and drowned.” “Oh no–you’re kidding me! Was it at least a quick death?” “Not at all–he got out 3 times to piss.”
That reminds me of my great uncle in Cork. He had retired and was drinking at the pub everyday. His wife was like “Reilly you have come home drunk everyday and oh no you’ve thrown up all over yourself again this will not do! If you come home drunk ever again I’m leaving you!” Reilly was like “oh darlin I love ya, I’m gonna stop the drinking for Ya darlin.” The next day he went down the road to get a paper and a bottle of whisky for the home. Anyway his route took him past the pub. His mate Paddy saw him and dragged him in for just one pint with his old mate, Paddy. One thing led to another before he knew it he was lying on the footpath outside the pub with vomit all down his front, he leaned over to Paddy and said “oh no Paddy, I’ve done it again! I’ve got meself pickled and thrown up over me front. She’s definitely going to leave me now!” Paddy was like “nono here’s what we’ll do, take a twenty out of your wallet and hold it up as you’re walking through the door and say I was walking past the pub and a drunk fella’s tumbled into me and thrown up all over me, but don’t worry here’s the twenty for the dry cleaning!” Reilly was like “capital idea, you know this might just work!”
So he goes home twenty in hand and is confronted by his wife on the step “oh no Reilly look at yourself you’re drunk again and I’m leaving you!” Reilly was like “no no…” and went over the story and showed the twenty for the dry cleaning. His wife nodding said “ well ok, what is the other twenty for?” Without skipping a beat, Reilly says “that is from the man who shat in my pants.”
Very Non PC of you.
I love it.
Dumb alcos.
Just FYI planning was granted in April 2018, two years on no work done, big climbing facility out there but no sign of a wavepool.
https://wavelengthmag.com/p…
There was some new thing. https://www.thenational.sco…
Well cool, I was out that way climbing in the spring, if they are opening by 2022 they better get going as nothing visible has been done. Climbing arena is fantastik and huge.
Thanks for the link, we get over that way some and would try it for sure.
Tried the Bristol pool, was mildly entertaining but repetitive. Lots of waves though and the people running the operation very nice.
Is there enough critical mass to keep this open? I guess if they have whiskey as the liquid in the pool, it will be full nonstop. Also climate change is decimating the marginal ski industry they have there so I could see this being a transition business plan.
Climate change is good for food production.
And terrible in other ways: sea level rise and extreme weather swings. It’s a bleak prospect for humanity, and only the wealthy will be semi-insulted in the medium term.
Very sound argument against mid-lengths.
I’m sure Chazz is more suited to dispense such advice, but should haggis be considered a proper energizing pre-surf meal, or a satiating post-surf feast?
After eating haggis there is nothing to do but have another whisky and go to sleep for a long, long time.
It’s an anytime and no time sort of food.
Edit: bloody good imo.
Damn good on pizza too!
Cosmo’s does a commercial version that’s acceptable but we always piled on even more before baking it.