Australian Capital Territory celebrates Queensland reopening its borders, releases surfing image so “shockingly lewd” as to demand “members-only” subscription!

Whoa.

Those who have never been to Australia may be surprised to discover that behind the sunny smiles, puka shell necklaces and “g’days” lies an absolutely draconian form of government. Rules and laws, restrictions and regulations that would have made those Pensioner Guards of old wince. During these Covid times, for example, states cut themselves off entirely from one another and made it illegal to travel across borders (unless holding a Kelly Slater passport).

Harsh.

Well, as the pandemic eases, Australia is re-opening to itself. A few short days ago, for example, Queensland opened its doors to those arriving from other states by air. It was a such a welcome surprise to the country’s surfers, as Queensland features many world-class waves and also world-class surfing family’s like the Wrights, Wilsons and Coffeys.

The Australian Capital Territory’s Labor government was thrilled, and possibly observing those Coffeys, that it released a surfing image so shockingly lewd as to demand its own “members-only” subscription.

Whoa.

More as the story develops.


Legend Australian surfer-shaper pleads guilty to murder of ex-wife’s husband

The curtain closes on the sad life of an Australian champion… 

If you live around Margaret River, you’ll know the shaper Tony Hardy and his brood. Amazing surf family. Tony is pops to surfer-bodyboarders Gene, Ryan, Brett and Josh.

All of ’em except Josh have won a State surfing title. Even his granddaughter Willow scooped one up to go alongside her two Small Fries crowns.

But Tony stopped surfing a while back; blamed age, injuries.

He is what you’d call, in polite company, an eccentric.

You’d see him at Main Break, Margaret River, the wave he owned in the seventies, trimming the pig-face that has grown over the footpath. 

Or stopped at the side of the road in Margs with his shears trimming the bush.

On a Tuesday afternoon in January 2018, Tony allegedly got into a fight with his ex-wife’s husband, who was seventy-five, fatally injuring the man. 

Tony’s ex-wife was also hospitalised for injuries.

The cops caught Tony hiding in bushland later in the afternoon.

Tony, who is now seventy, was set to argue he was not criminally responsible on the basis he was of unsound mind.

Yesterday, Tony changed his plea, admitting to his ex-wife’s husband’s murder and causing grievous bodily harm to his ex-wife.

He was remanded in custody until a sentencing hearing on January 28.


It’s a girl: Yet another gender reveal party goes horribly sideways as father shoots himself in the crotch, potentially derailing hopes and dreams of birthing next Kelly Slater-esque surf prodigy!

"Well this is off to a great start."

Gender reveal parties have, potentially, done more to damage professional surfing’s future than global warming, Great White shark attacks and “orca-strated” Killer Whale terrorism combined.

You certainly read about the recent celebration that threatened to burn the surf industry’s historical home of California to the ground.

Now we have an east coast father who nearly and/or did castrate himself while attempting to reveal the sex of his soon to be born child.

Tom Cressotti of Massachusetts and his pregnant wife were very excited to share their good news but, as these things go, Tom pointed his rocket the wrong way and, according to footage, nearly and/or did destroy his chances of fathering the next Kelly Slater-esque surf superstar.

Though the surf industry is experiencing what many call a nadir, all it takes is one transcending hero to bring it all back to fortune. Kelly Slater is currently 48-years-old and not getting any younger, though also from an east coast city featuring very bad waves. The next Kelly Slater is likely to be born on the east coast too which makes Cressotti’s choice to castrate himself all the more frustrating.

At least he did not burn down Massachusetts, telling a local paper, “That would be very hard from Massachusetts.”

Does Massachusetts not burn?

Is it immune to these troubles?

More as the story develops.


Help legendary Oregon surf photographer Mark McInnis rebuild after losing everything in devastating Holiday Farm Fire!

"His home, his digital photographs, film negatives, family heirlooms, clothes and everything he owned is gone."

The recent fires in Washington and Oregon have devastated so many. As an Oregonian, I watched in horror as complete towns became engulfed in flames, entire regions laid bare. The Pacific Northwest’s surf community is small and tight and I discovered, yesterday, that the legendary PNW surf photographer Mark McInnis had lost everything as his house burned to the ground.

Chris Burkard, who recently appeared on Dirty Water and is very near a saint, set up a Go Fund Me for his good friend, writing:

Friend & photographer, Mark McInnis, has brought joy to many with his images of distant waves and remote landscapes. He recently moved back to his home in the PNW only to have the recent Holiday Farm Fire completely decimate the community of Blue River, Oregon. And with it, his home. The salt in the wound is that this tragedy occurred just prior to finishing a year long project of backing up his entire collection of images offsite. He was left with nothing. His home, his digital photographs, film negatives, family heirlooms, clothes and everything he owned is gone. We are talking well over six figures of loss. The harsh reality that Mark’s cameras and entire library of images and backups were all set ablaze is a learning lesson for any creative person, especially when your livelihood depends on it. My hope is that we can give back to Mark to get him back on his feet and hopefully repay the joy that he has given all of us through his photographs. And, for the record, Mark refused to set this up himself. It took some harsh words from a friend for Mark to realize that we are grieving as he grieves and that the way we heal, is to help. So while he may not ask for help, but he genuinely needs it. Furthermore, in true McInnis fashion, Mark is insisting on donating 10% of all donations over the $30,000 mark to The Upper McKenzie and Volunteer Firefighter Relief Fund. Thank you in advance for supporting my great friend, a valued member of the photography community and an inspiration to us all.

If you have every enjoyed McInnis’s beautiful work, or care to help, please click here.

And thank you.


Surf-adjacent dentist who removed patient’s tooth while riding hoverboard gets 12-year prison sentence: “You darn near killed some people!”

Very tough.

Oh to feel that surf life, to need that surf life, but to be trapped somewhere difficult to live that surf life. Such was the predicament of dentist Seth Lookhart who had set up his practice in Alaska, a state that has surf (listen to photographer Chris Burkard describe) but difficult to easily access surf.

What did Dentist Lookhart do to itch that scratch on a regular basis?

Extract teeth while cruising a hoverboard, of course, also extract teeth without patient permission etc. Giving him the sensation of riding the foamball over a treacherous stretch of reef. Many consequences. High stakes etc.

We surfers, we understand this feeling, this need, but the Anchorage Superior Court does not and handed dentist Lookhart a 12-year sentence for reckless endangerment and fraud. The judge declaring, “In reviewing all this over and over again, I have this visceral response — you darn near killed some people….” as Dentist Lookhart was whisked away.

If you were locked behind bars in Alaska for 12-years what sort of hobby would you take up?

I might begin carving miniature totem poles from soap.

Or maybe become an expert in training street tough Killer Whales in order to unleash them on my enemies upon release.

Win-win, I suppose.