Breaking: World Surf League has last laugh as surfers pull out of glorious World Surfing Games leaving brave usurper Fernando Aguerre in the lurch!

Drama!

The drama, glorious drama, around the International Surfing Association’s World Surfing Games, in stupendous El Salvador, have embraced every ounce of drama that the World Surf League, and its Positive Wall of Noise, have shirked.

To wit, Fernando Aguerre, one-time Reef bottle opening sandal owner and chief of the aforementioned International Surfing Association, became king maker when his ISA gathered all rights to which surfers would be allowed in surfing’s grand debut in the 2020/2021 Olympics.

His moment to shine.

World Surf League, previously the only show in town, shut out.

Embarrassing.

Like an Oklahoma summer.

Oh and how Aguerre did press his advantage, forcing all World Surf League surfers to superlative El Salvador in order to collect their tickets to the Olympic dance via his World Surfing Games.

Quarantining etc.

Were they happy?

No.

Many rumors of sadness and frustration.

Furiousness.

Did they have a choice?

No.

World Surf League, Covid-19 spikes, etc. be damned. Aguerre had the power, had all surfing power…. until he didn’t.

Pre-qualified-for-the-Olympic World Surf League surfers began pulling out of the World Surfing Games, hours ago, one after the other after the other. Claiming injury, claiming they didn’t want to knock out other Olympic hopefuls. Flying home and leaving spectacular El Salvador behind. Leaving Aguerre holding the bag at the end.

Except is he?

The waves in Surf City look fun.

Ukraine looks fierce.

Julian Wilson knows but having last laugh alongside Erik Logan?

Who wins here?

More as the story develops.

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Lemon Next to the Pie
Lemon Next to the Pie
5 years ago

Winners are gritters?

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
5 years ago

The real winner is the unknown guy who is going to get laid with his story about beating Julian or Gabe at a big important contest.

Stick man
Stick man
5 years ago

The World International Surf(ing) Association of Leagues Federation.

Stick man
Stick man
5 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

p.s. is that Tyler Wright performing one of those Slater 180 wheelie airs on some shitty-as pop-out?

Chibagato
Chibagato
5 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

Looks like a backside alley-oop! Never seen anyone pull one of those…

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

Let’s hope we end up with more belts than boxing ?

Black Rubber
Black Rubber
5 years ago

If we’ve learned anything from this event (by not watching it, of course, ’cause who cares?) it’s that the ISA is not a better option than the WSL. They have 10x the number of competitors and the most confusing contest format I’ve ever seen. It’s actually worse than the WSL!

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Black Rubber

I think the only thing going for it is that it is super inclusive ….. unlike the IPS/ASP/ WSL Circus which has been like a gentlemen’s club ( for thugs ) ultra exclusive ?

Black Rubber
Black Rubber
5 years ago

My suspicion is what we will find is that all-inclusive leads to four days of heats that don’t matter. We already have the problem with 30-ish competitors. We don’t need people from Norway, unless they can compete to win.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Black Rubber

As my Nan said …. you try to please everyone , you please no one …
And then a midget novocastrian from Angourie …. a totally unknown , who was the last to qualify , ends John John’s year , before the knee and finds himself in the top 5 …..sometimes bringing in outsiders works ? At least if the rookie of the year race for the last few years is an indicator ….

nyc surfing golden boy
nyc surfing golden boy
5 years ago

no one gives a fuck about any of this shit

Jordy's low key claim
Jordy's low key claim
5 years ago

Can we have a caption to this article lead picture, pls? It’s almost more interesting than the story itself.

Barrelled
Barrelled
5 years ago

Took the words out of my mouth. What are we seeing here?

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Smith entering a new ultra minimalist phase was heard to utter
“ no caption is the new caption …. “ ?

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
5 years ago

This is such a mess. If the wozz had any balls they’d have told Fernando to lick a dick and protected their top tier since they already qual’d via the tour.
Credit to the surfers actually pulling out. It seems a ridiculous call in make them go. Even if there wasn’t an ass flu pandemic hacking it’s way through year number two.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
5 years ago

It’s weird but if you go to the isa Web page and look under Olympic qualifying, it does say all qualifiers must attend the games.
I reckon it’s a last minute add on (because no one was talking about it 2 years ago).

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago

I have been trying to find the results on the ISA’s website to no avail .
A surfer from my club Elouera Board riders Club in Oz , Shane Campbell , is representing Canada and I believe he is still in the event after seeing his post on Instagram but fucked if I can work out who else is still remaining in the heat draw …. or in the country ?

c4
c4
5 years ago

Heat 127 of the losers round today. He must have lost in the third round of the main draw to go to the losers round.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

Thanks C4 …. I found live and results but got no results …. silly old me

c4
c4
5 years ago

Looks like he’s gonna surf in about five more heats from now. Weird system they have. Click on repercharge round four on the right side of the live feed.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

Thanks C4 …. I am a specialist with the WSL results , can even get the nationality and score of each judge with the touch of a digit but , like the Vans triple crown site the ISA is a true Labyrinth for me …. No Country For Old Men ? …. Not quite true because The ISA has run masters events for decades with my former sparring partners at Elouera , Rod Baldwin and Glenn Pringle , taking a 1st in the over 45s and a 2nd in the over 40s in the ISA World Masters in Panama 2010.

c4
c4
5 years ago

It’s just a really badly designed site. You look at what heat is running and the live scores and it says something like heat 5, but on the right the same heat is 121 or whatever. It doesn’t even say Quarters, Semis etc. I had to count how many heats there are in the rounds to figure out where the semis are.

astro
astro
5 years ago

Bwahahahahahahar
Too funny.

ricmatic
ricmatic
5 years ago

Ive never seen so many foot injuries!

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  ricmatic

As if they were reforming Le Club Foote ?

Mapski
Mapski
5 years ago

Hard to tell who has pulled out when there is forty thousand losers heats(repecharge?) Watched the Eithan Osborn shitshow heat and then Owen Wright narrowly fighting off some Russian who claimed every time he stood up. Inclusion dilutes content.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Mapski

Please tell me the former Soviet’s name is Boris …. ? And His girl is Natasha …am I wright ?
https://youtu.be/4txmBNCAXg8

DavidC
DavidC
5 years ago

“But Boris darling what about Moose & Squirrel!”

Shotgun
Shotgun
5 years ago

Been waiting for this one! Very interesting indeed… Jordy all of a sudden had ‘visa issues’. Medina was a no show for his Rnd 2 heat. Looks like Carissa and Caroline also both surfed their first heats, then bailed… fulfilling their obligation to compete at the ISA’s to maintain their Olympic spot… At the last ISA’s none of the Aussie CT’ers wanted to be there and made it very clear in how they moped around the site and got mysterious sushi-itis… except for R-Cal and Sal who actually love that environment. Now R-Cal is out, Owens in the repercharge round etc etc. Oh please keep digging Charles.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Shotgun

Visa Issues …. Some of the Elite Athletes in the competition have so many houses ( and nationalities ) in so many countries they may not know where home is anymore or who they are and if they need a visa to go home or anywhere else or where the fuck home is ….. something I like to call The Chant of Jimmy Blacksmith Syndrome ….not being anything at all…. like a ghost stuck between who they were and who they might be ?

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
5 years ago

Just run constant bikini contest, and hook it all to a dating website. Coin!!

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  ValiantScorn

Give the Girls Guns ….. and then Run Amok
https://youtu.be/8fyr0zbaFyE

DavidC
DavidC
5 years ago

Lux Interior, one of the truly great frontmen & destroyer of mic stands!

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  DavidC

I was very impressed by his little latex / PVC ensemble .

samwaters
samwaters
5 years ago

Maybe there is hope for the tribe.

samwaters
samwaters
5 years ago
Reply to  samwaters

P.S.
But how many really left?
5?
10?
I’m thinking all these wanna be pros are all pretty
wimped out, and really don’t wanna burn any bridges and are gonna toe the line.

Kenneth Noisewater
Kenneth Noisewater
5 years ago
DavidC
DavidC
5 years ago

I love this vid – it’s so bad. “oh no I’m in a room of mirrors & there’s some weird babes coming at me!”

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  DavidC

It wasn’t all bad haircuts in 82
Burning Down the House …..

https://youtu.be/_3eC35LoF4U

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Stick man
Stick man
5 years ago
James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Stick man

The 80s Graphics some how makes the wife beater look ….. cool ?

DavidC
DavidC
5 years ago

Totally agree!

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
5 years ago

Erik is giggling, giddily… thinking about the 380 million people* interested in surfing getting pumped to watch** the WSL season finale at Trestles after watching Kelly place sixth during surfing’s Olympic debut in 1′ beach break.
*WSL marketing department numbers for prospective viewers include adding the populations of the United States (331 mil); Australia (26 mil); metropolitan areas of Durban, Cape Town, and Port Elizabeth in South Africa (9 mil); and 14 million assorted other peoples they just guessed as a reasonable number.
**Not watch.

Karl Myers
Karl Myers
5 years ago

Which surfers pulled out?

c4
c4
5 years ago
Reply to  Karl Myers

Everybody except Italo basically.

samwaters
samwaters
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

I wouldn’t be so sure.

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  c4

Has Elvis left the Building ?

Boat Docks
Boat Docks
5 years ago
Reply to  Karl Myers

Real Surfers don’t “pull out”

James Bickerton
James Bickerton
5 years ago
Reply to  Boat Docks

A French Mate modeled PullIn Underwear but often pulled it out just to keep the ladies happy ….

Mista Spakle
Mista Spakle
5 years ago
Reply to  Karl Myers

you didnt expect chas to actually do some journalism or learn how to write an article did u?


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