World’s biggest surf network rocked by charges of VAL-phobia! “A commenter says leashes should be put around our necks. This implies a noose or something an enslaved person would wear”

"My clients & team don’t deserve to be targeted & made fun of."

A much-loved surf-based fitness studio in New York City has slammed the world’s biggest surf network as VAL-phobic after a recent post, or repost if you wanna be accurate, on Instagram. 

BeachGrit’s social media director, the noted author Chas Smith (buy Cocaine and Surfing, here, Welcome to Paradise Now Go to Hell, here, Reports from Hell, here) had, without permission, shared a short video from @surfsetnyc with the caption “World Surf League.” 

https://www.instagram.com/p/CPdatW8Hdpo/

Although quickly reported by @surfsetnyc and the video subsequently removed by Instagram, BeachGrit commenters were unable to resist the urge to make fun of the WSL and therefore blind to the joy of New Yorkers riding their SURFSET® Board (Rip SurferX), a “6-foot long surfboard on top of three balance balls, designed to mimic the feeling of being on water.”

Early this morning, BeachGrit received the following missives.

“We are a small family business trying to survive. We got hit very hard by Covid & have been closed for 14 months with no income for our family and our kids. This video is from the first day we opened after 432 days. We support the surfing community, respecting more experienced surfers & educating beginners, so everyone is safer in the water. My clients & team don’t deserve to be targeted & made fun of. Please take it down.”

And, 

“A commenter has says that leashes should be put around our necks. This implies a noose or something an enslaved person would wear. Take. This. Video. Down. Now.”

All fair charges, I think, although the connection between a legrope and slavery a little tenuous, a very long bow to draw.

SurfSet NYC’s story is a good one, inspirational etc. 

Per the website, 

“Aaron Thouvenin and Diana Garrett are two of the world’s first SURFSET® Fitness Master Trainers & Ambassadors. They started their SURFSET® journey as students when the company launched in 2011. Not only did they study directly with the SURFSET® Fitness founders to best understand the company’s vision and fitness method, but they also had the unique opportunity to work with some of the top spinning, bootcamp, TRX®, kickboxing, barre, yoga, pilates, and dance trainers in New York City to learn creative new ways to workout on the board.”

SurfSet NYC’s studio is on 64 East 4th Street, 4th Floor between Bowery & 2nd Ave. 

A drop-in class costs twenty-five dollars or unlimited sessions for one hundred and ninety-nine dollars per month. 

An unlimited membership also offers ten percent off  “Epic Beach Day Surf & Epic Pool Day Surf Getaways.”

Book here.  

And watch, Vic Secret’s Model Martha Hunt, at SurfSet NYC here. 


Surfing’s International governing bodies recoil as Russian Dwarf Athletic Association sends shot across bow: “There’s nothing serious about this, this isn’t sport. It’s unethical, wrong!”

Much worry.

Surfing’s international governing bodies including, but not limited to, the World Surf League and the International Surfing Association are still recoiling from yesterday’s news that the Russian Dwarf Athletic Association has weighed in on an upcoming fight, calling it “unethical” and “a laughing show.”

The bout would pit 3’4 eighteen-year-old Hasbulla Magomedov against 3’5 seventeen-year-old Abdu Rozik.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CO7-1U6KID3/

Russian Dwarf Athletic Association chief Uliana Podpalnaya, breaking with traditional silence, released a damning statement declaring, “There’s nothing serious about this, this isn’t sport. This is unethical, wrong, from my point of view. It seems to be that only on the one hand it can be correct and beautiful – if martial arts among small people are made a Paralympic sport. It could be Judo, Karate, and people will understand that this is a serious sport, serious performances, and not some kind of laughing show. Events like this don’t draw attention to the sport of little people. If interest in this appears, it’s only business a lot of money is being invested in it. And from the point of view of the sports career growth of these guys, there are no prospects.”

Surfing’s bosses, well aware of both the general small to medium stature of professional surfers and the fact that many consider surfing, as a sport, to be unethical and wrong, are said to be extremely worried that the sentiment will cross from the fight game to the surf one and professional surfing, itself, will become a target of protest ahead of its Olympic debut.

Hasbulla Magomedov, in the meantime, has become a hero to surf journalists everywhere.

https://www.instagram.com/p/CPeIWJGHFz7/

The World Surfing Games, in sensational El Salvador will enter its fourth day of competition with all eyes on Russia to see how the drama will unfold.

The World Surf League’s Jeep Surf Ranch Pro presented by Barefoot Wine is just over two weeks away.

Much hand ringing especially as Kelly Slater’s Surf Ranch does no favors with regard to the optics of height.

And is also considered unethical and wrong.

More as the story develops.


Dead juvie White.

Cache of Great White meat, and liver, seized one month after decapitated head of Great White shark, covered in stab wounds, found on popular New Zealand beach!

Orcas cleared of killing etc.

A few weeks back, the head, pec fins and innards of a juvie White were found on Pilot Bay Beach near the base of Mount Maunganui in the country’s North Island, the presumption being the fish had been killed for its meat. 

Now, a cache of Great White shark steaks, and liver, has been seized by the Department of Conservation with the man living at the address assisting, as they say, DOC investigators with their enquires. 

When the detritus of the killing was found there was speculation that the fish might’ve been hit by Orcas, whose lust for White livers is legendary.

That theory was hosed down by the photographer Dick Marquand.

“A clean cut just behind the gills is a fair indication that it wasn’t orca. Though that is open to interpretation of course… It was a clean cut to remove head but left pectoral fins and innards – bags still intact. Teeth and jaw intact. Stab wounds (approx 12) on head. Underside fins had been ‘filleted’ off and were found nearby.”

Great White meat ain’t on many menus.

In NZ, you get caught processing a White and you’ll be hit with prison, up to two years, and a fine of 250k, NZ, around 180k US. 

Still, diners who’ve enjoyed White flesh say it’s not unlike alligator, although it must be soaked well before eating ‘cause sharks piss through their skin. A better meat, if you like shark, is Mako, which is like a less oily swordfish. Marinate for twenty-four hours in a bowl filled with a mixture of chopped garlic, lemon juice, soy sauce and ginger.

Mercury isn’t too much of a concern unless y’eat it every day.


Open Thread: Comment live on day three of World Surfing Games from superlative El Salvador!

Better than work!

Bored at work after a glum Memorial Day?

Tune into the World Surfing Games in superlative El Salvador.

Heads rolling.

Olympic dreams dashed and made.

Watch here.

Comment below.


Debate over shark deterrent technologies re-ignites after Facebook chief Mark Zuckerberg seen wearing electromagnetic bracelet: “These Sharkbanz act only as a psychological safeguard. They have no effect at all.”

Outrages claims, counter-claims!

The insular surfing debate over the efficacy of shark deterrent technologies exploded into public view, overnight, when photographs of Facebook founder and CEO Mark Zuckerberg foiling in Hawaii and revealed he was not only wearing a helmet, but a Sharkbanz bracelet, and had painted the bottom of his board in zebra stripes to boot (view here).

Many abundances of caution.

Sharkbanz, the company that makes the bracelets that emit an electromagnetic charge in hopes of scaring sharks, immediately admitted that the 4th richest person in the world had, in fact, purchased its product from the website.

Maybe not great privacy settings.

The mainstream media pounced, taking sides in the pitched dispute. Business Insider posted a quote from the late Erich Ritter, famous for diving with bull sharks, who once said, “These Sharkbanz act only as a psychological safeguard. They have no effect at all.”

Also retold was the story the sixteen-year-old Florida boy who received a Sharkbanz bracelet for his birthday, put it on and was immediately bitten.

At the time, Sharkbanz founder Nathan Garrison told CBS News “I’m really relieved he is ok and he was super positive about his recovery. What happened here is essentially the rarest of shark encounters where Zack jumped off his board and pretty much landed on the shark. If anything it probably helped clear the shark out of the area quicker.”

Classic victim shaming.

Lad Bible, on the other hand, defended the devices as “fancy” and Zuckerberg’s behavior as “taking no chances.”

Have you come down on one side or the other yet or waiting for Taj Burrow’s medical opinion?

More as the story develops.