Order and progress.
But do you feel the tension? The fission? Strange days, yes, but also exciting ones to be alive and a fan of professional surfing. What is being described as a “substantial swell,” or in Surfline-speak “la bomba nuclear,” is currently making its way to Lower Trestles, home of Filipe Toledo’s “huge scuffle,” for the inaugural Final’s Day and wow just wow.
World Surf League CEO Erik Logan, Vans so clean he can see his own reflection in them, is certainly patting himself on the waxed back right now, congratulating himself for his foresight, his bold maneuvering, Gabriel Medina be damed.
And we will all be there, watching on computers and phones, cursing ourselves for loving it, cursing ourselves for wanting the aforementioned Gabriel Medina to both win and lose.
According to an overheard conversation between three Brazilian filmers on the path to Lower Trestles this very morning, however, the entire sovereign nation of Brazil is planning to be there, each man woman and child, on the beach.
“I got the best shots of Italo… It’s either Monday or Tuesday… The entire country is going to be down there.”
Wow.
Operation Neptune, which has come to be known as D Day, saw 24,000 Allied troops land on French beaches on June 6, 1944. Until now, it has been the largest seaborne invasion in history.
Brazil has a population of north of 213,000,000.
The Marines, at nearby Camp Pendleton, won’t stand a chance.
More as the story develops.
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Morgs is paying $42 over here
Are we allowed to post stab content here?
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Conner has no business being anywhere close to Gabby for a title. Nor does Morgan. Shit, Slater’s Trestles footage from Black and White is still more compelling than anything Morgan or Conner did in this clip.
Already have!
But I put a lazy 20 clams on everyone. Any of the back 3 win and it’s a money back+ situation. It should be noted that gambling is addictive, and I’m an addiction prone type of cunt.
Stick to crypto and buy the dips, even if armageddon is almost certain
What’s the point of even wagering?
Nevermind all that, the real story is me trying to cart a 30 pack on ice along with all the other beach accoutrements down that fuckin trail
I’ll do it, but it’s a 23 pack by the time I get to the bottom!
Shit, that means we’ll have to run to the packie on a continual loop!
it takes a village
Finally some swell on the horizon. 17-93ft! Word on the street is a certain hot young sponsored local pro has been hired to stand on the shoreline with folded arms with Matrix sunnies. Just standin there…
Since we’re decidedly Minor League, I’m going with the great Minor League Manager Phil Wellman for inspiration here.
Commando crawl to rosin bag grenade toss
https://thumbs.gfycat.com/D…
Our Gabby is gonna have to wait another year for #3. I doubt that Fil will waste his only opportunity to be WC.
Unless Morgs’ sends him in.
It’s headed our way — the Brazilian caravan. They’re coming for our waves & women. They’re rapists and murderers and uncivilized animals who lack etiquette in the water. The caravan is coming!
Yeahhh and If you stay in our way, we rape you too, even if you have a fluffy furry ass!
But rejoice, maybe one of us carry a little vaseline!
At last, without her… maybe, we spit!
I was trying to channel and mock trump. Didn’t execute- maybe I should use emojis. My bad. Love the Brazilians — what’s not to like.
It’s impossible to mock Trump when the work has already been done for you.
By Joey B?
I’m pretty sure Johnny Ramone would have been onboard.
I know you’re joking, relax! And I try too, and maybe, failed too! I’m not a patriotic lunatic like that entire of bunch crazy patriots in all sides!!!
Hahaha cheers!!!
It’s the result of relying on Cannabis for your creativity you see…
From a ultra right wing musician, a moron and ignorant obscurantist, Roger Moreira and his goup, Ultraje a Rigor… to California!
Suck it Trestles!!!
“From here on the hill you can see it so cool
what happens there on your coast
We like everything, we want more
From the top of the city to the edge of the pier
More than a good tan
we want to be on your side
We’re coming in without oil or cream
Needing, we squeeze
Bringing the farofa and the chicken
Also taking the phonograph
separate a place in this sand
we will shake your village
mix your ilk
Or run away
get out of ambush
jump in the bay
Now we are going to invade your beachmix your ilk
Or run away
get out of ambush
jump in the bay
Now we are going to invade your beach
your beach
Now if you’re gonna mind
So you better move
It’s no use even despising us
(If we get used to it, we’ll stay)
We’re looking for a change
And your beach comes in handy
no need to be nervous
you might find it tasty
Staying in such healthy company
It may even be highly recommendable to you
we can poke you
don’t be afraid it won’t hurt
mix your ilk
Or run away
get out of ambush
jump in the bay
Now we are going to invade your beach
mix your ilk
Or run away
get out of ambush
jump in the bay
Now we are going to invade your beach
Oh oh
your beach
Oh
we will invade
mix your ilk
Or run away
get out of ambush
jump in the bay
Now we are going to invade your beach
mix your ilk
Or run away
get out of ambush
jump in the bay
Now we are going to invade your beach
Oh oh
your beach
Oh
we will invade”
Pfft! The 1st Supply Battalion could smash them. Wouldn’t even have to activate MARSOC. Little buddies have big heart, but that’s about it.
ValiantScorn and Otto have 213,000,000,000,000 rounds between them, and scopes that only focus on brown skin pigmentation. SoCal will be protected, no worries Chas.
“I have killed many Mexicans, I do not know how many…some of them were not worth counting.”~ Geronimo
All of you are invaders. Quit picking skin colors for your virtue signaling!
So it’s a rainbow scope to target the gays? Lots of them in Brazil, too.
Think you’re conflating nationality and skin pigmentation, Scorn. Virtuously, DHMF
Wreckless Eric – whole wide world
(watch on YouTube, I still can’t upload video links from my phone.
Oi Chas, could you upload it for me please, while the story develops ?)
Highly recommended for this wOsl comp
Here you go Beefy. that first verse gets me every time. Back in the day before CDs were a thing, I put a stereo in my HR wagon that was worth more than the car. Much internal debate later to decide which cassette would be first to be played would be. I eventually picked a compilation tape and this song kicked off Side 1. So you brought up some warm fuzzies there.
The second version tells a story.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
Good shit
Was that an Alpine stereo ?
A few of us in my area had Alpine’s that were worth far more than our cars haha
They (Alpine) were the fashion of the time, but I had a Sherwood unit and some speakers that started with a ‘C’. Both were US made and therefore weren’t as attractive to car thieves that were common on the Gold Coast point car parks.
The real shame was that if I had the fore sight to replace the spare tire well and fill it with a bass speaker, I could have been heard 5 miles away. The Sherwood had a very powerful pre-amp that pushed many more watts than it looked capable of.
Love it!!
Everything good about BG – a non-news story but somehow still makes me get fired up about something!
Wait until you read about Jonah Hill wooing and winning the heart of a surf instructor!
Fil flew some family in to celebrate his inevitable illegitimate world title.
Though if Trestles pumps the final scene of the tour should at least be fun to watch.
“Gabriel Medina be damed”
Typo? Freudian slip? Do you think he will be made into a woman? I think he has a great chance of winning the comp. Whoever wins the ’21 World Title knows it will forever be marred by the asterisk of shame (courtesy of ELo/WSL).
Another Monument to Incompetence.
Shall we say; Le Incompument?
On the 20th anniversary of 9/11, perhaps a quick edit removing references to invasions, D Day, and Marines not standing a chance could be made?
Not trying to be overly sensitive or tell you how to run your site, but those lines just hit different today.
I hear you but sarcastic hyperbole is the American way! 🇺🇸
SarChastic
More Americans will die today from a virus for which we have a vaccine, than perished that tragic day. Maybe all the fucks arguing against reality, can get some opprobrium from you instead?
Had to google opprobrium first. Thanks for the new word to the vocab.
Legitimately not trying to start shit in any direction. The vaccine/covid is another issue and I live in Central America where it’s not the main topic of anyone’s discussions.
I shared an honest comment in the aptly-named comment section and the author made a reply the same way. All good and appreciated his thought.
Bringing up anything related to nationalism, military, medicine, sex, surfing, WSL, sharks, Kelly Slater, guns, race, weather and climate, and Stab mag, starts shit on this site. Which is exactly what Chas and DR want. We’re all players in their game.
This is true.
I wrote for an extinct surf/action sports website around 2007. Whenever traffic was down we scoured the internet for any signs of a shark attack to sensationalize.
That vaccine (which I have) ain’t stopping anything. Stop lying to yourself.
It’s good for the planet
You climate terrorist
Yeah but how many of them have ever hit a peeble going 30 mph on a skateboard down the trail?
A right of passage this generation of privileged young surfers and their e-bikes will never know…