World’s greatest surfer Kelly Slater presents… something to the James Bond franchise at the 94th Academy Awards before actor-rapper Will Smith punches out actor-comedian Chris Rock tossing the whole affair into complete madness!

GOAT.

I will tell you a truth long known in surf circles but maybe new to gilded Hollywood. Let Kelly Slater into the room and who knows what will happen.

The Academy Awards has gone on for ninety-four mostly dull years until this one here where the world’s greatest surfer stood between the world’s greatest first person to land a 900 on a vert skateboard halfpipe (Tony Hawk) and the world’s greatest American Olympic snowboard halfpipe champion (Shaun White).

The fact that Hawk and White try to position as “GOATs” in their respective pursuits is utterly laughable but not more so than the Oscars descending into utter madness when the very famous Will Smith socked Chris Rock in the mouth over mentioning his wife Jada in a reference to G.I. Jane and, likely, Slater’s overall weird presence.

Will Smith punches Chris Rock after he jokes about his wife

Whoa.

What was Slater thinking?

Is he Team Smith or Team Rock?

Will he get blocked from future Oscar appearances like he has blocked so many before him?

More questions than answers.

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channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

OK Mi Ho.
I’m guilty as charged. I’ve gotten sloppy and wide in my old age esp once moved to Australia.
Love to give you some stickers.

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

“I’m a slapper, bitch! I’ll bet you don’t even know how fingers work!”

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Really. Honestly. Not a joke.

Oh you mean the ‘C-word’? Yeah I like to rock the Australian vernacular here on the ‘Grit occasionally.
I mean, if Dr. Jen See can do it, then I can throw my previous cautions to the wind for impact now and again.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago

Can someone with photoshop skills insert Kelly’s head onto Jada’s?

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago

ahh me shoe horny!

J H
J H
4 years ago

I like Chris Rock.

J H
J H
4 years ago

Again…I ask…where was the Açaí Bowl?

paulo de tarso
paulo de tarso
4 years ago

We need now in the next Oscar
Chas as one of Oscar hosts, joking, violently,, yellow beanie’s wife…
But this time I want Chas engage in the fight!
He’s now a bjj, and like Jor El J. Tzu, a living weapon!

Durban Poison
Durban Poison
4 years ago

What’s most surprising is that the CUNT previously known as GOAT didn’t also slap Chris Rock. He’s clearly a chronic Alopecia sufferer and must be feeling pretty touchy about having to swallow the bitter Covid vaccine pill in his desperate pursuit of world title no.12 and eternal existence in the land down under.

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Email me for some stickers Mi Ho. That’ll cheer you up.

sammichjammich AT gmail.com

That goes for the rest of you cunts too.

Stanislav Franck
Stanislav Franck
4 years ago

Ahead of his time!

Stanislav Franck
Stanislav Franck
4 years ago

As long as your boots don’t resemble The Iron Sheik’s….

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago

Noone slapped Ricky.

Blade
Blade
4 years ago

Making something fit me thinks 😅

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
4 years ago

Or Ashton (complete with yellow beanie of course) and Chas together to present an award. What could go wrong?

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

then folks really wouldn’t know who the F they are…

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

Ashton is a fucking trend setter!

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

BTW here’s the un-censored version.
I thought it was fake too until I saw this.

https://www.reddit.com/r/De…

Uneducated
Uneducated
4 years ago

I just hope Wil credited beachgrit in his acceptance speech

Mudgate, sailor Karen…Ashton and chas…its clear where he gets his inspiration

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago

The guy who played Ali either can’t punch or it’s fake, I’d go with the latter, Rock didn’t miss a beat.

Pauly Matt War-Shore
Pauly Matt War-Shore
4 years ago

Dunno. He seemed pretty rattled.

AI (for ever) .
AI (for ever) .
4 years ago

He delivered a documentary, aw, Oscar?

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago

Maybe you are right. If so Chris is a mighty cool dude

Pauly Matt War-Shore
Pauly Matt War-Shore
4 years ago

“He mentions what Denzel Washington said to him after the punch “At your highest, that’s when the devil comes for you”.
Denzel Washington”

WTF is wrong with celebrities/Americans

J H
J H
4 years ago

Will is one of them See-entologists so Xenu made him do it.

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
4 years ago

A lot to unwrap there.

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago

E G O

Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
4 years ago

A whole lot..

Uneducated
Uneducated
4 years ago

I actually think wil found it mildly amusing…until he looked over and saw jadas reaction

mike m
mike m
4 years ago
Reply to  Uneducated

Yup.

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
4 years ago

He didn’t throw a punch. It was an open handed slap. Big difference.

Spinafex
Spinafex
4 years ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

Smith, still in character from Richard 3, was challenging him to a dual. Nobody else pick up on that?

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

You are right, I have watched it a few times, it was real! Hard to believe

Otto
Otto
4 years ago

This is why he was sent to Bel-Air in the first place. Shit like this.

https://youtu.be/9pLZYRI9Dk4

RQ.
RQ.
4 years ago

hahaha, i KNEW this story would appear here, all i wondered was how it could be shoehorned in to ‘surf adjacent’.
well played.

Hippy
Hippy
4 years ago
Reply to  RQ.

exactly.


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