"Thanks a lot, Pinetrees."
"Thanks a lot, Pinetrees."

Hawaiian officials consider offering inland property swaps to those currently living in beachfront homes as fear of sea-level rise reaches critical mass: “People just don’t realize that they’re doomed.”

Time for managed retreat?

If Bob Dylan sang it once, he sang it 1000 times and those times are certainly a-changin. Emmanuel Macron has just been elected president of France, professional surfer Kelly Slater is 4th in the world and the environment is threatening to eat people alive.

But what to do when the ocean’s waters rise and rise and rise and disappear whole properties? Well, Kauai County, part of the island state of Hawaii, is considering offering inland turf swaps for those who currently dwell in beachside homes.

According to Honolulu Civil Beat:

“Every beachfront house will eventually fall into the ocean,” said Chip Fletcher, associate dean for academic affairs at the School of Ocean and Earth Science and Technology at UH Manoa. “People just don’t realize that they’re doomed.”

Homeowners in this newly designated danger zone did not ask the county to bail them out, and several of those interviewed for this story said they’re against it. But property swapping is a concept that county planners are exploring as they consider the costs of doing nothing — namely, the loss of beaches that are a public trust asset and the displacement of local families.

“The plan would be to clear these properties and structures out of the way so that the natural erosion process can happen and we can have a beach there in perpetuity,” said Kauai County Planning Director Kaaina Hull. “If the houses are collapsing in the water, then it’s another big question of who’s going to clean this up?”

As the surf eats away at the island’s contours, one way of adapting involves demolishing oceanfront homes, businesses, hotels and roads and rebuilding them inland.

But managed retreat, as it’s called, is logistically complicated. It would require tremendous amounts of political will, community buy-in and money. And there’s no blueprint in Hawaii for implementing it on a large scale.

If you happened to live beachfront in Kauai would you trade out for a nice valley home?

Maybe a Honolulu penthouse?

Or would you do what the world’s 4th best surfer does and lay illegal tacos out front in order to stop nature in its ugly tracks?

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jaa dee
jaa dee
4 years ago

It is the science man volcanic islands with dormant volcanoes sink little by little untill poof they are gone 10 or 50 thousand years the ocean will be about the same but the Hawaiian islands will be 1 the big island… just science

Rotorhead47
Rotorhead47
4 years ago

B. S. Is that why Obama bought a house on the beach? People ever hear of “chicken little”? May want to read up.

Mattygbythesea
Mattygbythesea
4 years ago

Why Nanci Pelosi recently buy a beachfront house in Florida then? She must know something the scientist don’t.

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

I’m just curious how you manage to “stay positive” ?

…

Oh wait.

sorry.

I misunderstood.

Carry on!

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago

Same. It’s fucking hard

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
4 years ago

It’s the anti-depressive way.

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

So do you go around with a mask and lick everyone you see in public? That’s real dedication.

Manuka
Manuka
4 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Positive is negative and negative is positive. Orwellian times!

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

I read a book about sand a couple of years ago. Sounds boring as fuck to most people I’m sure, but I love single-topic natural sciences writing like that which gets ‘into the nitty gritty,’ if you forgive the whachamacallit.

Your typical grain of silicon or other hard mineral sand (not the calcium carbonate stuff from shells) which was weathered down from the original lump of mineral, has then subsequently been laid down via sediment transport in water or dessert, turned to sandstone, weathered out again as loose sand and repeated the process FIVE OR SIX TIMES.

I find that depth of time mind blowing.

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
4 years ago

My GOD, these people have been trying this scam forever. Oddly enough, my beachfront property still has the same water line, as when my Family bought it in ’78.(Back in the 1900’s)
Next they are going to force you to move, because they think it’s safer for you. Or maybe they make you move into an “inland encampment”, until they feel you were safe for others!?

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
4 years ago

Give up an oceanfront home? No. Fucking. Way.

I would lay so many “illegal tacos” people would start calling me Matt Gaetz.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago

JOB dozens seem fazed, in fact Psyched!!
I think he’d know better than most

toofattosurf
toofattosurf
4 years ago

trade ranch in rio all cultivated, 15 min from beach, for pipe house… anyone?

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Wait, so who gets to trade their inland house to a beachfront one for a while before being swamped?

StarJamma
StarJamma
4 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

No, inland peeps get swapped to boats. For example, a family in Aeia can now live on JohnJohn’s boat while a Ehukai resident gets their Aeia home! It will be easy as making a burrito while doing calculus!

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
Reply to  StarJamma

Ah….. that makes sense. Hence the confiscation of Russian oligarchs’ yacths, yahcts, yhacths, boats.

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago

I appreciate your positive spin

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
4 years ago

Tell a large group of Mexicans, heading north to do a border jump, that there’s a pile of giant burritos in Hawaii.
They could then head to the coast, ‘borrow’ a boat, sail off bound for Ehukai, and have a burrito party on Kelly’s lawn…

german_surfer_007
german_surfer_007
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

Burritos are not from Mexico, it’s a USA thing. Just saying.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
4 years ago

Exactly
That’s why they’re heading north over the border in the first place, to feast upon the much fantisised about American Burrito that they’ve grown up hearing of.
If told that there’s an abundance of massive burritos in Hawaii they may very well change they plans and go there instead…

german_surfer_007
german_surfer_007
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

A burrito to a mexican is like a kiwi wearing shoes, bizarre.

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
4 years ago

Laugh Out Loud!!!

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Why does Germany export pizzas to the UK?

german_surfer_007
german_surfer_007
4 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

Why does New Zealand import kiwifruit from Italy.

astro
astro
4 years ago

No laces, cuz.
Quick getaways.

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

german_surfer_007
german_surfer_007
4 years ago
Reply to  astro

I would have no issue if the feet were beautiful. They never are. I guess the exposure to the elements from a young age sculpt them like a weathered fruit.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
4 years ago

“If the houses are collapsing in the water, then it’s another big question of who’s going to clean this up?”

How about the dumbasses who bought the homes? Why is it always the rest of us who have to pay for the wealthy’s misfortune with our tax dollars.

JOB's second chin
JOB's second chin
4 years ago
Reply to  Sean Connery

Some of them bought their place back in the 50s and 60s before we knew about climate change and whatnot. They actually aren’t well off financially at all. What about them?

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
4 years ago

I’ll give them a pass then

jaa dee
jaa dee
4 years ago

I lived there in the 70s not very much ocean side development

astro
astro
4 years ago

Slaters already moved to leMoore.
How much further inland do you want him to go ?

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
4 years ago
Reply to  astro

Oklahoma?

jaa dee
jaa dee
4 years ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

China

Ricky Spanish
Ricky Spanish
4 years ago

Saying this project had a 0% chance of success would be optimistic

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
4 years ago

Nothing Kelly’s burrito won’t solve!

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

They’re enchiladas! Honestly Jonny, how many times do we have to tell you about these quesadillas. Seriously Timmy. Please pay attention.

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  channelbottom

ehh taco…en quesadilla know… es nacho cheese!


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