Sharks menace waters off East Coast Dog Surfing Championships causing delay as they flash teeth and threaten to eat man’s best friend in front of stoic owners: “To be honest, driving I-4 is more dangerous!”

Bells what?

Now, of course you know that the iconic Bells Beach has hosted the most consecutive (save Covid blackhole) surf competitions in the history of our beloved sport but did you know that Florida’s Cocoa Beach is second or, more correctly, was second? Birthplace of Kelly Slater and home to his very famous statue, the town of nearly 12,000 used to stage a multi-day surf festival but people stopped coming, or caring, so Cocoa Beach is now the site of the most famous dog surfing championships on the planet.

Many bravos and the most recent wrapped over Easter weekend, featuring an almost 7-year-old yellow Labrador Retriever besting the field but Lily, as her people call her, was almost eaten by sharks before hoisting the trophy.

According to Florida Today, “It was the first time over the 10-year range of the contest that sharks had interrupted the crowd-pleasing event, and according to Theresa Clifton, event host and executive director of the Brevard Humane Society. She was told the creatures were within 10 feet of the shoreline. Lifeguards whistled for everyone to leave the ocean, but Lily’s owner and trainer, Michael Vogt of Port St. Lucie, did not overreact while standing about 20 yards out. ‘To be honest, driving I-4 is much more dangerous,’ he said, smiling.”

The I-4 is an expressway that runs from the Daytona area to Tampa right through Orlando, which is currently embroiled in a nasty mess with Disney. A1A Beachfront Avenue is more famous, I’d imagine, which runs along a causeway to the east as Vanilla Ice rapped about it on his hit single Ice, Ice, Baby.

Back to Lily, though, how chill is Mr. Micael Vogt? Makes Mick Fanning look like a real scaredy-cat, no?

Also, what do you think the Humane Society thinks about a blatant disregard for sharks?

What about PETA?

More questions than answers.