"I didn’t achieve what I wanted to achieve. And I don’t want that to happen to anyone else."
If you’ve been around these pages long enough you’ll know the story of Andy King, a hard-charging goofyfooter from Cronulla, Australia, who hit his head in a fight outside a nightclub in 2004 and lost his hearing, his balance, his pro surfing career.
The fight was usual theatre for Cronulla late on a Saturday night. A gang of footy players mouthed off to Andy’s chick from across the road; he “glazed over”, ran across the bitumen and confronted all eight of ’em.
“Ended up getting the shit kicked out of me,” he says in Make or Break.
Next thing, his head is smashed on the concrete gutter.
I went to see Andy at the hospital shortly after the fight and he was surprisingly bright given the catastrophic change to his life. Andy’s resilience was legend. He’d never had it easy. When he was a kid Andy slept with a knife under his pillow to protect himself from a violent alcoholic Dad.
Fast forward fifteen years and Andy is intro’d to Medina by Mick Fanning at a time when Medina’s life is going through rapid change, the estrangement of his family, a new wife and so on.
Medina’s shaper Johnny Cabianca said King’s arrival stilled Medina’s emotional state, elevated his performance.
And, now, Andy, now forty-five, is the unlikely star of Apple TV’s Make or Break series, stealing the show in episode two, Brazilian Storm.
“Kingy is extremely loyal, extremely passionate, he’s not going to back down,” Mick Fanning says.
We see Gabriel and Andy, in Cronulla, preparing for their first surf together.
In a moving scene, Andy tells Gabriel, “I’m going to take my cochlear off. I’m deaf.”
Andy smiles, “Just use sign language”, mimicking the universal sign for barrels.
In his to-camera interviews on Brazilian Storm, Andy forces back tears, then weeps openly, turns away from the screen.
“As you can see, I’m part robotic,” he says. “I’m half-machine. I’ve got two cochlears.”
The season ends with Andy and Gabriel, along with Gabriel’s now ex-wife Yasmin who says prophetically “Some people think that I’m just going to end his career and that he’s going to be unfocused”, celebrating Gabriel’s third world title.
“I didn’t achieve what I wanted to achieve,” Andy says, “And I don’t want that to happen to anyone. I want to make sure they’re completely content and that they can take what they’ve got out of their surfing and bring it to their own life.”
Pro surfers generally aren’t that intelligent of interesting. Hard pass for me.
Hard of hearing is the new intelligent of interesting.
Or so I’ve heard.
If only bex had written that
I’m a deaf person – I wear two cochlear implants and do alright with them but I was surprised that Kingy still surfs deaf. I wear a waterproof mic setup that’s amazing. I surfed deaf for 20 years but holy shit it has gotten loud out there once I could hear again. The biggest change, though, was all those farts I used to think were silent. Explained a lot. PS – the series is great, I binged all six.
Real talk.
I grew up with Kingy. Not adjacent, like saw him from across the street and shit, but in the same patch of water at the Alley and through some really big (mis)adventures together. Some too fucked up to recount now that he’s a star. Can’t say a bad word about him. Dunno anyone who can.
His dad Nigel had a good heart, a bad drinking habit, and a worse temper. Good on Andy and his sisters for doing well for themselves.
As for the fame he’s now getting as coach to the stars, fuck knows what’s going on there. As Kingy himself says, “it’s all smoke and mirrors.”
His Dad was pretty wild in the water , but Kingy was always , a class act in the water , all turns big turns , and polite on land …. Definition of a Good Bloke
Yeah Nige was larger than life when Andy was really young and then things just spiralled. I got on really well with Nige when he was sober so it was hard to deal with his sad and dangerous decline – as a good friend of Nige and a better friend of Andy.
Not sure about all the EBC lads – Wiley Fowler and Aaron Blue were my age – but pretty much all the guys I grew up with at the Alley came from broken families yet most of us turned out pretty well. Go figure eh…
A few loose canons in the ages above me but my era of Simo Taylor, Hodgey, Matt Hurworth etc have all made great lives for themselves. Almost all of us left Cronulla though…as has Kingy, the Currumbin man!
Cronulla’s Geographic position , a cauldron , supplying waves for St George and Sutherland Shire’s Socio-Economic melange of so many Surfers from so many places and backgrounds …. possibly not anymore ?
Elouera BC had an eclectic mix
of Private School Boys , from Murph Lube Madgo Ash Gee to Hard Core locals like The Pringles and Crazy Party People like Hawkins Meakins Macca Jughead etc and slick Tradies like Baldwin to Intellos like Sic Mic and Kat and Ben Horvath
which is possibly why we got on like a house on fire with ITN ( another crazy gang from Bondi Bronte ) and less so with Maroubra ( they once wanted to kill us after we beat them at surf league ) .
I was very lucky to spend some time with Cronulla BC legends Woofo Hendo and Fanga and learnt lots .
Anyway I’ll be supporting old Mate Bill Zaffas’ Kid Chris and Kalani Ball next week at Snapper
I’m three episodes in, been watching with my daughter (surfs) and wife (doesn’t surf and can’t stand watching the comps) and we’re all quite enjoying it. Seems to get better as we go, too.
I wonder what kind of audience it’s getting though. It’s only available through Apple TV and I’m guessing the core of its subscriber are in the USA.
I have got two testicles
Together they also perform roughly half the duties of one normal mans
Perhaps you could get 3 more inserted and then your scrotum would fit like…..like a Glove
So in summary, we had Tyler scream the men get it better while at the same acknowledgement that she doesn’t want what they have ( pipe).
Next was our mental health episode with Mandela.
Now we have the disability episode.
The rookie battlers episode been and gone so this leaves us the angry episode ( Italo?)
And a pet/ animal episode.
The thing of real interest is how the surf media is circling the wagons and raving how amazing it is.
Do they not realise that this production overnight success goes to show fuckkkk they have been in there job for decades?
You can tell in the series how much Kingy means to Gabby. There’s something really meaningful in the way Gabby refers to him as “Kingy”, I think it’s the accent but it’s very nice. He fully buys into the approach and the show, err, shows what cool cunts they both are.
This show is legit good, unpopular opinion round here, but I don’t care. I liked it, I was entertained and enjoyed, finally, some bullshit free wozz related content.
Edit* give me a job E-Low
I have been enjoying it as well.
Yeah, Andy and bottle are unexpected stars in this thing. I poo-pooed it like the rest of the BG warriors until I started watching last night. Not as compelling as the formula one series but much better than I expected.
It should be easy to make pro surfing’s behind the scenes compelling. Attractive people at the beach, in competition. It writes itself. Imagine this show, but on tour surfers from the 80s and 90s? The ones today are too clean and into too much training, but still, there should be enough to keep people entertained. Especially compared to some of the other reality show shit that’s out there.
Watch the ciblic ep, drinks piss, roots chick and tells coach and cameras to fuck off
At least he can turn his robot ears off so he doesn’t have to listen to Shannon and Joe etc…
I’ll watch it later…much later
Dude looking like Will Ferrell’s serious brother.
On the other hand Ozark second half just came out, safer bet than rolling the dice on Apple TV and forgetting to hit cancel subscription
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Some kinda T Knox/ Italo Ferreira Anglo-Saxon hybrid version of sorts…
Even with the bleached mullet he still doesn’t look as crazy as ex Cronulla Surfer /Singer /Entrepreneur Gary Hughes , who proposed to Surfing NSW , exotic dancers ( STRIPPERS) as entertainment for a junior event at a meeting with other non surfing Public Servants …..
first whoop now flogging the fuck out of this – how many episodes are we looking at here as filler???
I cried this morning when I got stopped at a red light, then was yahooing at the next green.
Then back to crying, then more crying, then green, yahoo life’s great!!, then got went thru a toll and pulled out my knife, then my phone rang and a Chinese lady saying
You rate,when you come?
I raughed and raughed .
My Father would shred me to this day if I went on TV and boohooed about some professional surfer/coach relationship. My GOD, quit eating soy products…..
Soy products are great for many reasons. You should open your mind a little Mr Scorn.
You haven’t watched it have you.
He doesn’t even go to the beach.
Valley ants’ corn farmer.
Fuck Dez if you’re gonna spruik it this hard at least share your login credentials
God damn it. Am I gonna have to watch this show?
Our very own moderator seems to recommend viewing out of Elos butt hole.
Whatever that might look like ???
Fairly foul, I’d imagine.
I dunno, maybe purchase an endoscope, as a start ?
PROCTOLOGY CHAMPIONSHIP TOUR
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He should be able to make it out of that one.
Wide open – the end section hasn’t started to pinch.
Rosie would call it beautifully.
He backdoored that section and made it !
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Perfect.
Rosie: “…AND HE’S OUT WITH THE POOOOF OF SPIT!!!”
Nuggetron !
I’m feeling marginalised and bullied, might have to make a move to moderating the WSL’s U-tube feed.
Mate.. you’d be canceling Fuckers left right and centre for their horrible views. In the plus side, you’d be down with Nathan Florence.
Please don’t resign your Hurluley sponsorship deal. You’re the only plumber that we’ve got. What will we do when our Pipe House gets blocked up?
Just make a badge for yourself of a plunger.
The next episode will air in due course. You’ll feel like a whole man again in no time, I just know it.
Lean a little bit closer, see
Rosie really smell like poo-poo-ooh…
After having Piles removed may I suggest that you find a specialist with the lovely long and lithe fingers of the Pianist and not like the troll that my wife found who had seriously 10 THUMBS