Blowing it.
Longboarding, as they say, is so hot right now. In Western Australia, the most inspirational story has just unfolded with surfing’s first ever competitive transexual competitor, Sasha Jane Lowerson, absolutely demolishing the women’s division to hoist the cup high above her tousled strawberry blonde head. And in eastern Australia, the World Surf League’s longboard tour is set to officially kick off with the Great Wall Motors Sydney Surf Pro at Manly Beach.
Oh but you certainly wouldn’t know it as the aforementioned World Surf League is absolutely smothering the feel-good story of the year with its utter incompetence. Thankfully sitting longboard champion, currently suspended, Joel Tudor is around to shine his light on the excitement while, at the same time, questioning the WSL itself.
Tudor took to Instagram and wrote:
First event for longboard tour starts in few days / as per usual the ding dongs @wsl haven’t given any advertisements or posts regarding it! Good luck to all the men & women competing! Bet ya 20$ it goes back to high pro wanking as style of choice now that @devon_howard has resigned! Here’s the great Gary Propper showing how it’s done!
The “dong dongs” really are blowing it. The drum of equality has been beaten, hard, in Santa Monica for years now but apparently “equality” has its limits. Apparently it doesn’t include surfboards longer than six feet two inches nor edifying stories of transexual surfers beating all odds and wildly thrashing a pack of women.
Tudor’s question about how this year’s tour will be judged, anyhow, is very interesting in light of Devon Howard’s resignation. Will “high pro wanking” be rewarded or will traditional grace and style win the day?
Also, how fantastic would a final between Lowerson and Tudor be? Guaranteed mainstream coverage, that’s for certain.
Blowing it.
Utterly blowing it.
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Oh shite…
As a matter of fact, we’ve been trying to get in touch with you about your car insurance policy…
Yes, it’s being a lesbian trapped in a man’s body.
I can see a man and a woman taking out by the Longboard world title this year , with luck it may be one and the same surfer , Go Sasha ! Go
Fuck me that would wrap Jessie Miley Dyers brain in a knot. Is joel-ene joel? If so they need to be punished! But if Joel-ene isn’t joel then we need to give this brave woman every fighting chance they rightly deserve. Much to ponder. Justice for Joel-ene is the obvious stance to take of course
Oh – haha – yes of course – God, that’d be funny!
Everything I needed to know about avoiding ayahuasca I learnt from the two twats who were the most enthusiastic advocates of/for it. Both are fully dipped conspiracy fantasists who if nothing else, convinced me that if it had any possibility into making me like them, I was not interested.
I’m wondering if Joel should be cancelled for cultural appropriation vis a vis the traditional song of the little people of Emerald City; ‘Ding Dong, The Witch is Dead’.
Ding dong? Joel Tudor?
That name rings a bell.
pray tell cause I don’t get it?
Making your own humans is meaningful. At least i find it fulfilling.
Tudors doing more to promote the Longboarding than the wsl 😂😂😂
“Here’s the great Gary Propper showing how it’s done!”
#nominativedeterminism
I always go to Channel Bottom for these things, hes all over it. Like a rash.
I recommend Sudocrem, Bexy.
Does it sting?
Pay per view Lowerson v Tudor. I got $5 on it. No matter who wins or loses between the two of ’em, the polemics win no matter.
Breaking news! WSL being bought by pets.com
Poodles RUS?
Longboarding is a lifestyle
How dare you.
#bornthisway. Etc.
For a $20 entry fee someone should de pant and wank on wave that would be great!!!
Just learned that Joel Tudor owns all the surf shops on kauai. Judging by the amount of tshirts being sold, with no classic longboards and a super limited amount of surf hardware at all, he just seems like a rich old prick.
Give us more information.
He doesn’t own any surf shops on kauai
Whats black and doesn’t work?
Patrick Swayze’s Pancreas!
You know, when a man really loves his dog, one jar of honey is never enough.