Our gal.
Our gal.

Multi-platinum recording artist Shakira faces eight-years in Spanish prison for tax evasion, vows to fight as surfers rally ’round adopted sister!

Go team.

The US Open of Surfing is currently underway, biggest event of our entire world, though un-streamed as the financially robust World Surf League has chosen to aim those riches at cutting Challenger Series events.

Surfline is currently calling Huntington Beach 2-3 foot, poor to fair, which means 0-1 foot crap to unchill so we may not be missing out on much but, meanwhile, across the “pond” in Spain, multi-platinum recording artist Shakira is headed to court over a tax evasion charge and facing eight years in prison, with a loss.

Per The Washington Post:

On Friday, prosecutors unveiled six charges against Shakira, 45, after she rejected a settlement deal earlier this week, El País reported. According to the Spanish newspaper, authorities highlighted the substantial amount of taxes she allegedly owed, as well as her record of using offshore tax havens, as aggravating factors in the case.

The Grammy-winning performer, famous for hit songs such as “Hips Don’t Lie” and “Waka Waka,” has denied wrongdoing on multiple occasions, including during her court testimony in 2019.

Shakira’s publicists in London said the singer “has always cooperated and abided by the law, demonstrating impeccable conduct as an individual and a taxpayer,” the Associated Press reported. Her public relations team in Spain said she immediately repaid the amount she owed to the country’s tax agency once she was notified. She also deposited an additional 3 million euros in interest. These payments, El País reported, may be considered a mitigating circumstance by prosecutors when it comes to the length of a potential prison sentence.

The tax fraud charges hinge on where Shakira lived from 2012 to 2014. She claims that her tax residency was in the Bahamas until 2015, when she relocated to Barcelona with her partner, FC Barcelona soccer player Gerard Piqué. (The couple, who have two children together, last month announced the end of their 11-year relationship.)

The “announced end of the 11-year relationship with Pique” is when surfers, worldwide, adopted the Colombian chanteuse as she chose to mend her broken heart by sorting out her backside hitch while possibly making eyes at her surf instructor.

One of us.

And we will, certainly, rally around our adopted sister. Showing up outside Spanish courts with signs screaming “DON’T DROP IN ON SHAKIRA!” and “BACK OFF WAR CHILD!’ referencing Spain’s fascist past.

We don’t ever let one of our own down, not ever, unless they ride a surfboard over 7’1.

Go team.

 

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
34 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
Captain Clark
Captain Clark
4 years ago

Surely we have convicted spanish arms dealer we can swap. Surely.

shorebreak69
shorebreak69
4 years ago

Wait, what? No streaming?? WTF?? How will I get my jollies now, not being able to troll Brazzo surf fan kooks? Goddammit!!

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago
tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago

we have nothin bindin here…river raftin?

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago

Westside be bitches mane
https://youtu.be/q4b3w6a9cSk

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
4 years ago

Those dang New York Ivy Leaguers do suck.

mike m
mike m
4 years ago

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Cuchi-Cuchi!

frank
frank
4 years ago
Reply to  mike m

Charro!, heck yeah!!!

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  mike m

Kinda looks like GOAT-boy!

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago
Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
4 years ago

When she firstly became suddenly successful (with little talent etc) I recall it being suggested that her whole organisation was just being used as a money laundering front for a Colombian cartel anyway…

german_surfer_007
german_surfer_007
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

This just in, middle aged farmer from the backwaters of planet earth gives in-depth analysis of the most popular and talented female latin artist that ever existed.

Stick man
Stick man
4 years ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

No drug problems there…

https://www.youtube.com/wat…

Hippy
Hippy
4 years ago

Senor Chas, wasn’t your daughter a little kid during the Covid Euro trip that had child protective services menacing you?

I know time has changed since Covid, but how did she grow so much as to learn to drive?

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
4 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

That’s my other daughter! She was 9 when wife and I married, almost 21 now so I figure I’ve done the yards to call her such and love her to the absolute end!

ricmatic
ricmatic
4 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

that’s some good dad work.

Gwen Walz’s Eyes
Gwen Walz’s Eyes
4 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

That warms my heart.I take back 80% of the horrible things ive said about you on this site.

Com Turren
Com Turren
4 years ago

Spanish prosecutors will call her hips to the stand in order to get truthful testimony.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago

If shes lucky in pris she might get a tranny to give her little titties a tittyfuk.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago

I suspect many on BG would go full tranny or at least pretend so as to provide the services you suggest

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

Shes 45 mate with sprogs.
Hardly appealing.
Sings like a strangled cat too
I heard CB is growing his tits out tho

astro
astro
4 years ago

Yea?
Well you post like a stangled cat.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
4 years ago
Reply to  astro

Sharp as ever

astro
astro
4 years ago

Cheers, matey !

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago

You’re right, she’s way too young for me! Steely Dan nailed it with Hey Nineteen back in ’81

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago

UM, I now have to sell my 8 oooooh Mick Fanning Beastie due to the last sentence in this article. With the proceeds I will spend every dime on Shakira music downloads because I care!

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
4 years ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

Thank you for your service.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

Fat old guy now buying a Lost Mr X Mayhem in the BG approved 6 NINE length. Sasha will be pissed

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
4 years ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

You are allowed 6’10.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Chas Smith

PM want’s to buy space, radio waves and a tent at truffles/

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  tim_nelsen

I’m in on sponsoring a piece(up to $10k) of the tent BUT we need you spinning a wall of positive noise from the DJ booth!

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
4 years ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

Black Friday or Black Sabbath?

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
4 years ago
Reply to  tim_nelsen

Black Friday- Less angry! But will we see it in the near future?

channelbottom
channelbottom
4 years ago

Generally I find her pop aesthetic very tacky, but perhaps the Spanish gummit disagrees. “We demand more tackiness!”


34
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x