4 of 10 days gone...

A menace is headed for Tahiti, a lurching, growling horror that takes the form of angry water that will, when it arrives, buckle over Teahupoo’s famed reef, looking to chew up and swallow anyone in its gaping mouth. Teahupoo, currently, appears paradisiacal. Soft winds blowing over impossibly blue water. Verdant cliffs climbing skyward.

Little waves breaking fun.

As we all know, though, thanks to our World Surf League’s official forecasting partner, all of that will change with the arrival of a “double-overhead+” swell due to arrive in the latter part of the Outerknown Tahiti Pro.

Current world number one, Filipe Toledo, must certainly have an eye on the models while maybe pleading with the WSL’s deputy commissioner to get underway as soon as possible. He is, of course, a small-wave maestro, the best surfer in the world on waves under three-feet, but what about when waves get large?

I suppose we don’t really know as he often bravely refuses to paddle.

Thankfully, for him, none of this really matters. He has a dominant lead in the rankings and is a lock for “Final’s Day” at never-scary Trestles and the only indignity he will suffer, if he doesn’t commit to the maw, is a thoroughly tattered reputation which begs an interesting question: would you rather be world champion or highly regarded?

In any case, the World Surf League, calling the event off in two-day-at-a-time chunks makes me wonder if they are paying the commentary crew only on days that they show up to work.

Cost saving.

The world’s poorest billionaire Dirk Ziff using Joe Turpel’s per diem to buy his own coffee.

Economical.

A journey of self-discovery!

While our World Surf League is mired in bad PR, cutting historic events due lack of financial health, getting punched directly in the mouth by beloved surfer reps, others in the space are thriving.

Take, for example, dogs riding soft tops, which very much overshadowed the WSL Challenger Series US Open of Surfing.

Or darling of Edinburgh Fringe, Surfing the Holyland.

Now, I spent a few glorious days in Edinburgh, many years ago, and fell in love with its black medieval vibe. Hulking castle in the middle of town, cobblestoned streets running from whiskey joint to whiskey joint.

Peaty.

And I have been aware of Edinburgh Fringe for almost as long, though not exactly certain what it was until today when I learned it is the world’s largest arts festival that is featuring the aforementioned Surfing the Holyland which, per Deadline News, is described:

THIS one–woman show covering twelve characters is a definitive must-see performance.

Erin Hunter tells her story of an American who moves from Ohio to Tel Aviv when her husband gets a new job.

With no work visa, what is she to do with her time? She learns to surf of course.

Not only does she learn how to navigate the waters of the Middle East, but the challenges on land too.

Erin tells of her adjusting to a different culture, dealing with loneliness, hostility and her husband now becoming increasingly distant as he becomes obsessed with religion.

With a sexy surf teacher taking up all of her time, and finding a new hobby, how will this turn out for her?

Erin puts on a quirky, fast-paced show, that blends both comedy and music, as we join her on a year-long journey of self-discovery, uncovering new passions and finding the way back to each other.

Will JP Currie go and see?

Dirk Ziff wish he invested in one-woman shows instead of the World Surf League?

Currently more questions than answers.