"You could say Stab is the best thing that ever happened to me."

World’s biggest surf website faced with existential revolt from readers, “What’s been built here is important. It needs to continue. This is still surfing’s home of dissent. Something to protect!”

"When the model’s working, there’s nothing better. But recently there’s been an imbalance. You know what I’m talking about."

There’s a mate I grew up surfing with who is a real pain in the arse. One of those guys who every time you see him can cut you down with a simple, devastating quip.

It might be about my hair. My weight. The board I’m riding. The turn I just bogged.

“Still fucking up those roundhouses I see,” my mate will hiss as I’m paddling back out.

He’s catty. Clever. Incisive. Sometimes I can’t stand the cunt.

But god damn he can hit the mark. I am getting balder, fatter. I do ride ridiculous boards. I am still a massive kook.

I’ll always still love him. He holds me to account in a way few else will.

My mate, you see, is a bit like BeachGrit.

Catty. Clever. Incisive (or is it cheap, funny, character revealing?)

Not afraid to say what everyone else is thinking. To push the boundaries in a way that’s as instructive as it is destructive. It’s a fine quality to have.

Something I want to see continue here.

I want to take a second, if you will indulge me, and consider this virtual establishment we find ourselves so regularly posted up in.

Like you, I’ve been kicking around on BeachGrit for a good few years now.

I’ve always been drawn to its honesty. Brashness. Irreverence. A culture of taking the piss I first came across as a kid, under the Rielly-Baker era of ASL and Kidman-Sutherland era of Waves in the early to mid-90s (though it has roots deeper than that).

Surf media shaped me in my formative years. I hadn’t even started high school by the time I was being conditioned by the subversiveness of DC Green, the crassness of Gonad Man.

For better or worse, I’ve always been wary of anyone taking themselves too seriously. In life and in surfing.

I started reading and commenting here back around 2017. Had my first article published a year or so later.

Post Post-Surf, it was good to see that tradition of muck-racking enduring.

Messrs Rielly and Smith have cottoned on to a strategy for BeachGrit that’s as simple as it is effective. Playing the algorithm game without any pretences.

Mastering the art of self referential click bait.

By relying on Google Adsense and click revenue from non-endemic advertising, the Grit has gained true independence from the surf media’s cottage industry. While raking in the biggest online audience around.

A model the rest of the surf world is quickly waking up to.

Most importantly, this joint isn’t afraid to kill our idols when they need it. To tell the truth.

In a world of toxic positivity, Tall Poppy Syndrome ain’t the worst thing in the world.

It does mean certain sacrifices. Things can get a bit nasty at times. The definition of surf and surf-adjacent can become blurred.

The Grit has been known to cross the line here and there.

But at its best this place is performance art. High-brow-low-brow.

Skewering surfing so sweetly, yet in doing so in a way that pays the ultimate homage to it.

When the model’s working, there’s nothing better. BeachGrit and its teflon Dons hold the surfing world to account in a way few others can.

It’s why I keep coming back multiple times daily. Why I can’t help loving the place. I’m sure it’s the same for you too.

But recently there’s been an imbalance. You know what I’m talking about.

The wild reporting on Giselle & Kelly. Tom Brady. Shakira. Seth Green. Bill Murray. Emrata.

Blatant gaming of trending names and keywords. Increasingly loose links to anything surf related. Surf adjacent has become surf spurious.

At least Jonah Hill has some tangible connection to our pastime. We could forgive the incessant gossip and speculation over his love life, his acting career, his achingly indy quiver.

But these latest efforts?

To paraphrase Colonel Kilgore, Giselle don’t surf.

Each day I log on hoping for things to be toned down. But the hole keeps getting dug deeper, and deeper,

I even tuned into a recent episode of the Grit podcast with Chas and David Lee Scales. The Grit is generally a good time.

Expressed in the same idiom as its online sister publication, but with a knowing wink to the audience thrown in. An opportunity to peak behind the curtain. Break the fourth wall.

Have a chuckle at how ridiculous things are. A chance for DLS to pull Chas into line.

But instead even Scales had now turned into a simpering lackey, pushing simple Dorothy Dixers to Chas about his latest rash of celebrity articles.

It was a bridge too far. If DLS wasn’t gonna keep the bastards honest, who will? Me?

Well ok, I can try.

Anybody with basic digital literacy can see this latest seam of content for what it is.

Search engine optimisation. SEO.The other thing the Grit does so well. Search “surf” in google and you’re bound to find recent Grit articles in the top results.

It means they don’t have to rely on Instagram, Facebook or TikTok for their traffic.

But it appears  the boys have discovered it doesn’t just need to be surf-adjacent keywords to send the traffic. Pick any trending topic and add a few references into your headline, first couple of pars and watch the clicks roll in.

The biggest little surf website on the internet has grown even bigger. It’s been a wild success in terms of ad revenue, I’m sure.

But at what cost?

With each new celebrity story, I find myself less interested in engaging. It’s like my mate in the surf stooping down to mum jokes or internet conspiracy rants.

I switch off.

C&D were concerned about whether or not they could, they didn’t stop to think if they should.

What’s been built here is important. It needs to continue. This is still surfing’s home of dissent. Something to protect.

But the natives are getting restless.

I recently read a good article on Stab. From a reader. A personal essay. About the gentrification of his local break. It was excellent writing, if not unfocussed in parts.

One of the best articles I’ve read this year, in print or on the web.

It’s the sort of read you’d traditionally expect on the Grit. Except it wasn’t.

Admittedly, it was behind the paywall. Even so it had pulled in 50 or so comments, and counting. More than a couple of familiar names from this side of the pond.

It could mark a shift. Stranger things have happened.

Not that I am abandoning this place. Not by a long shot. Derek gave me my first proper shot. Now blossomed into a nice little side hustle.

I’m forever grateful.

And as E-Lo, VALs and corporate greenwashers continue on their inexplicable ascent this place is more important than ever.
I would love to be contributing more, but life and other writing gigs are getting in the way.

Still, I’ll try.

I’ve got a coupla new old boards to review. A run in with a VAL a couple of weeks back that could make for a novella. Some surf-lit that’s been bubbling around my head for a few months now.

When I get the chance. When is that supposed to happen again?

But in the meantime, Chas and Derek have a job to do.

To focus that razor sharp wit and ebullient anger back on the targets that matter.

Like shoulder hopping pros and walls of positive noise. Rogue sharks and Matt George. Or was it Sam?

And for fuck’s sake, can you please fix up the comment threads so that they’re appearing under the right article?

Yours forever, surfads.

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K0o_o0K

The backbone of BG has always been the audience, and not just all those commenting under the line (myself excluded) but the ones given a voice. Rory, LT, JP, Surfads, more i can’t think to name.

Surely there are more first-hand experiences these great writers can tell to fill the widening void, like you said of your own, Surfads. My question is if the great ones are being asked to write or has it been decided to take the easy/cheap route via pop-ups of questionably aged elderly women with very nice attributes?

Nads On Yer Madre

Checking beachgrit recently has been like walking into a room with the same damn fart smell that won’t clear.

Jerzy Kaltenberg

oy, gevalt! please, no more metawanking!

samwaters

I can’t even tell what comments belong to what piece anymore.

Kelly Za'atar

Yeah, i used to check BG every hour. Now STAB has legit good content – both articles and video content (Stab high, stab highway, EAST, etc.) BG is a once a month at most visit.

Silverback skunkape

Gisele surfs,do your research

Litmus and Chill

The vector is the inside foil on futures fins with a high ride number. And when I say high, I mean gr8 and above.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

The Stab was good but so long. I would like to the world to 10% off word count. Really, it would make so many things. Good content costs money.

Like that…?

The Bitchy Crab

Bounce rate, users last month. Four hundred k-ish regulars, four mill freshies. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

My wife is all too familiar with that session duration.

@surfads

I hope she didn’t have 4 million new visitors last month too?

Eyyooooo!

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

Someone has to pay the bills!

Waterproof Polo

What does that peak around the 10th of the month or so represent DR?

Chief Hot stuff

Shy little things
Arent they

Stick man

Surf ad(s)jacent

The Bitchy Crab

Door is open for submissions, hundred bucks a shot for anything that runs.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

You could prob charge some of these punters 250, DR. In fact we’d all probably pay some if it means Chas doesn’t write anymore about Gisele.

Waterproof Polo

This is good Ads.
I think the fact Chas and DR ran it means they know things have been a bit off of late. And it’s only recent. I know I miss the way things used to be, but also haven’t felt like weighing in much of late. It’s a great little community here. I hope it’s not dead!

DaHuiLewis

It’s worrying how nailed-on this was.

I was in exactly the same place, looking forward to The Grit coming out so Scales, back from his nuptials and back focused on his real job, could ask “True Grit or clickbait shit?” of the whole site for the past few weeks.

As it dawned on me that he was going along with the Gisele nonsense, there I was…

SURF FAN DOUSES CANDLE OF HOPE, ENDS PODCAST PLAYBACK PREMATURELY IN SILENT PROTEST AT SURF JOURNALIST’S DYSTOPIA-REMINISCENT INFATUATION WITH LIFELESS MACHINE INTELLIGENCE!

The Bitchy Crab
ValiantScorn

I used to “hook up” with a hippie chic(sdsu Professor) who lived in Julian. Super hot for me, and the catch of a lifetime. Only problem; she couldn’t stand surf culture! Loved the beach, HATED SURFING! I had got lucky because she knew my Sister. She told me we would never be in a relationship because I surf. She said; “you will drop your life in a second, and shoot down to P Vallarte on a phone call. You get up in the middle of the night to check the wind. You can never be available to anything, or anyone else if there’s a swell. And you make fun of people on the shows I watch.”
The point: A true surfer can’t give a shi’ about the silly stuff Chas’ wife writes about on here, but it helps him seem somewhat “normal”. I laugh about it, because how much “surf info” is available every day?? Fill in the blank spots with whatever, at least they have something to complain about instead of blank space.

Waterproof Polo

“And you make fun of people on the shows I watch” – This hit home hard Scorn. I was only pulled up for this type of action last eve.

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

And was her passage of wind in the night, worthy?

ValiantScorn

You always think of the most important things…Only leaned partially hippy, so 50% Vegan. The 100% vegans will run u out!

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins

Need to date a faculty member from UCSC or San Fran State for that, probably.

tim_nelsen

will kindly drop out so you can step in…it.

Nicole Anstedt

Truth.
♥️🌊♥️

Marc Deveraux

Why is this drivel even being printed?

Low wide stinkbug stance

Printed?

Abscessed Llama

Sorry Ad’s! Your Messr’s have circled jerked the truth more times than not making sure they don’t shoot their spoils on the surf industry blue dress..

Capt Sensible

I really want to write something witty , unfortunately I’m a dumb cunt.


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