Evil has a name.
We are now two events into the World Surf League’s 2023 season which means, officially, three to go before the purposefully sadistic mid-year cull. Oh you certainly recall the joy, the sheer glee, displayed by the top brass leading up to the mass decapitation and the absolute pleasure Chief of Sport Jessi Miley-Dyer oozed when looking forward to re-watching the bloodletting on Make or Break.
Like a snuff film.
Well, the emotional toll on the surfers has been, more or less, kept under wraps, or at least until now, as Molly Picklum, Australia’s great hope, has shared details of the torture.
In a tender interview with The Sydney Morning Herald, the current world number one said it would “hours to unpack” the damage with her coach, Glen “Micro” Hall adding that she “couldn’t surf” afterward.
“There were these really fun little waves at a [Qualifying Series] contest in Ballito, just perfect waves,” He said. “But Molly just couldn’t surf it. It sounds like I’m exaggerating, but she just could not complete a wave: couldn’t stay up and finish her turns, couldn’t make manoeuvres she’d normally do with her eyes closed. She was trying so hard, had pushed herself so long. You could just see that she cared too much; she was trying to improve her surfing and compete and go to another level. That’s where the mid-year cut, all the emotions of it just bubbled to the surface.”
World Surf League sadism did not derail Picklum entirely, and thank goodness, but do you imagine the aforementioned Miley-Dyer, her Chief of Executives Erik Logan and gang have other tools in the dungeon to illicit pain from its charges.
A quarter-year cull, for example.
I suppose we’ll all soon find out.