Slater goes down fighting while fans weep!

Surf fans inconsolable as 51-year-old Kelly Slater’s three decades long professional career ends in sudden-death matchup at Margaret River Pro!

"He has been the custodian of pro surfing… The greatest of all time, that will never be matched."

After Kelly Slater’s barely conceivable heroics yesterday, beating the world number one and keeping his pro career alive for one more day, the Champ finally laid down his rusted barb today following his defeat in the round of thirty two at the Margaret River Pro. 

To avoid ending his career in ignominy, and the larger gloom of a tarnished legacy, the 11-time world champ needed to finish, likely, ninth or better in the event.

On a warm Autumn afternoon at the holiday hamlet three-and-a-half hours south of Perth, Slater was beaten by the Australian surfer Liam O’Brien, the surprise stand-out surfer of the event, John John Florence’s histrionics notwithstanding. 

“If there’s one point of difference… Liam’s been able to do three complete, full-blooded manoeuvres while Kelly’s been doin’ roundhouse cutties,” the 1978 world champ Wayne “Rabbit” Bartholomew said, although a late flurry, including the equal highest-score of the heat, a 7.83, reduced the margin somewhat. 

Slater was the youngest world champ (20, 1992) and the oldest world champ ever (39, 2011), has most world titles (11). most contest wins (56), etc etc.

Likely, he’ll compete at the next contest as a wildcard, The Surf Ranch Pro, a venue he created, as well as the Outerknown Pro in Tahiti, an event which he sponsors.

“He has been the custodian of pro surfing for the last thirty-one years. The greatest of all time, that will never be matched,” said the commentator and former tour surfer Richie Lovett.

“He’s left nothing on the table,” said Rabbit.

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justiceminister

Be inconsolable no more. The real career destiny of the great man is only just beginning.

LONGBEACH4417

Yet he flops like a soccer player…dude is a mental midget compared to MJ. He clearly has not recovered from Delonte banging his mom, it shows in every single thing he does, including calling the cops because someone (him) spray painted a racial epithet on his fence.

J H

That Pistons team was my absolute favorite.

I was a die hard Isiah Thomas fan.

Fun story…I checked in Chuck Daly one night at JFK. I asked him about the Dennis Rodman, free throws, shotgun story and he just laughed and said yes, it was true.

7dollarsurfboard

I think it was 2014 when Kelly accounced that he dropped quiksilver at margs, the next year at margs he announced he’s not riding CI’s, and at various occasions at margs hes announced hes retiring, now at margs his CT career has ended.

There’s something about this comp and Kelly. It’s also a CT event he’s never won.

Stick man

A11ah Slater!

Stick man

Mr. Clean

ricmatic

JPs story is on its way!

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Hippy

Kobe was a cunt.

Hippy

Le Bron is just as athletic.

Anyone remember Stern in the Sixer locker room demanding Barkley and Mahorn stop roughing him up?

Philly won game 1, Hersey hit a huge 3

LONGBEACH4417

Never forget he faked a hate crime.

LONGBEACH4417

Lebron faked a hate crime…

J H

Michael is 6’6″….not exactly a midget.

Hippy

Skinny

J H

You meant to say…fast!

tim_nelsen

way back when the transistor radio transported us into the game: “And Koufax has just pitched a perfect game!” Not a big basketball fan since Jerry West played. Was in the Forum when Gretsky scored his 100th career play-off goal and also watched Jethro Tull do their Passion Play thing and couldn’t find the car afterward. To stay relevent, I thought being a vendor at Dodger Stadium would be a cool job. NOT!

Rocks local

… and then a team you care about catches fire and you’re right back in it, living & dying on every play / pitch / shot etc. Also, lemme know if you ever saw Jerry W go left.

tim_nelsen

cubs 13 dodger 0. one hit wonders. https://fadeawayworld.net/….

tim_nelsen

he’s still studying Bugs. or is still Bug’s under study?

https://c8.alamy.com/compde…

tim_nelsen

take me out…(to the ballgame) if I don’t win its a shame..for its one, two…”A dog, a beer, and some cracker jack? No?”

Corey Webster

Slate’s looked fine after the loss, maybe even relieved. It was funny when Stace brought up the very next contest at the Pool, implying “you’re not on vacation yet”, Slater looked like he had blocked that out, “next contest?”. Funny how the tour still needs him, and clearly he doesn’t need the tour. Kinda wild too how bland a lot of the pros surfing looked after his heat. The tours not just losing his surfing, but the contrast he brings when surfing against other generations. His post heat perspectives are gone. The history he brings to every venue, gone. Seems pretty clear in hindsight, maybe even clear to Slater now, that at this point in his career being on tour wasn’t a dream, it was a job that saddled Slater with a ton of responsibilities to the sport. He’s not completely free from those responsibilities, his legacy is forever tied to it, but he’s earned a break from for now.

tim_nelsen

He’ll be the face of surfing for another century. Think gerry lopez, TheDuke, and Jackson Baker…

Corey Webster

Yeah, he’s earned it and does enjoy being the mainstream face of surfing. If he sticks to surf talk and doesn’t go off the rails mistaking 11 world titles as being a phd in everything non surfing, which it is not, he’ll be fine. Hopefully he can avoid the temptation to risk it all (risk cancellation anyway) for some passionately held idiotic belief.

Chief Hot stuff

They havent cancelled the bomb.

J H

Can’t hit what you can’t catch.

Michael was much more athletic.

Hippy

If Kanoa can surf for Japan, why not compete for Syria?

You don’t think Kelly can qualify against the Syrian team members?

7dollarsurfboard

Kelly has a year to achieve acceptable testosterone levels to compete as a women.

He/she will need a wig tho

J H

How soon can we expect his baseball career to start?

(And yes, you ignorant bastards…Michael Jordan is the NBA GOAT. There is literally no debate.)

Hippy

Michael never could win until the Celtics, Pistons, Lakers and Rockets retired.

Then he muscled An anemic NBA just like Occy and Sunny had to wait until Slater retired the first time.

J H

Reggie Miller and the NY Knicks vehemently disagree with that assessment.

Hippy

Flawed rosters each.

He beat up on Utah, Phoenix,Cavs

No more Larry, isaiah, Magic or Hakeem.

Great timing

J H

He beat Magic in his first final!

He also beat Stockton and Malone who just so happen to be hall of famers.

LONGBEACH4417

Pippin was drafted 2-4 years after his airness. That’s a lot to ask of Jordan to beat those teams by his lonesome. He had no one around him.

Chief Hot stuff

Who else got cut you useless surfblogger

The Bitchy Crab

Don’t care!

J H

FINALLY…some honesty in journalism!

Stick man

Nor do WE. (The People).

Chief Hot stuff

Fair nuff

Gil Gunderson

But what about KOLOHE!?!?

NEGATRON

Who?

Stick man

Ask @Dogsnuts…lol

bob

21 pushups deep, decided 51 was more of an appropriate number.

bob

Finished them, thanks Kelly. Full disclosure, I didn’t use him for surfival, luckily second guessed to Johnny Chianca.


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