“Filipe’s deal is un-spinnable. I feel crushed by what I saw. He isn’t ready for prime time at Teahupoo"
A byzantine selection process for the 2024 Paris Olympic Games has been slammed as “absurdist” and branded a “colossal failure” after Filipe Toledo, whose fraught relationship with Teahupoo ain’t no secret, was selected for Team Brazil over Gabriel Medina and Italo Ferreira.
In an ironic twist, it was against Ferreira in 2015 where Toledo suffered the ignominy of becoming one of only two surfers in pro surfing history to paddle in from a heat without a wave being caught.
Seven years later, Toledo almost reprised “his brave act of cowardice” in a heat against middle-aged veterans Kelly Slater, fifty, and Nathan Hedge, forty-three.
Toledo, with reputation for not enjoying the Teahupo’o battle, would certainly spear naysayers in the throat by dropping in to infamy, no? Apparently no.
Slater and Hedge traded waves, big and perfect, one after the other after the other with Toledo holding priority well out the back, refusing to paddle, one after the other after the other.
Slater, barreled, unable to contain smile.
Hedge, barreled, unable to contain smile or beat, smartly, boss.
Toledo, un-barreled, holding priority for fifteen-odd minutes while Slater and Hedge swapped beneath him.
In the dying seconds, the King of Saquarema swung on a baby tube then punched board in channel.
Again, this year, Toledo “bobbed, holding priority, while (wildcard Mihimana) Braye paddled, dropped, became barreled and was spat into applause. There he took off on a small closeout just to hand that priority over and not be forced into actually trying. There he lost 15.50 to 5.73. It was a shameful display and would be semi-forgiven if Toledo finally, and for the first time, admitted that Teahupo’o terrifies him.”
Now here’s the twist.
Australia, Jack Robinson, Ethan Ewing.
USA, John John Florence, Griff Colapinto.
JP Currie noted the contrast in his Tahiti Pro analysis,
The masters of this are Jack Robinson, Gabriel Medina and John Florence. Teahupo’o is their element, and their mastery is unmatched. The contrast between these three men and the one (Filipe Toledo) sitting atop the rankings is jarring. For the layperson or those new to pro surfing fandom, it would be hard to explain.”
Hope does loom for Medina, at least, on the horizon. Literally. A six-foot plus swell may appear next year and the lil man whose Teahupoo campaigns rival your ol pal DR’s (five trips, zero tubes) will be happy to sit it out and gift his card to Medina.
Or will the chance of Olympic gold awaken the famous Lion beneath the tattoo?
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U needa Knuckle sandwich f head
I’m actually far more concerned with how freakishly tiny Italo is! Neither of the guys either side of him are large humans yet they are towering over him and look like they weight 15kg more!
He seems to be OK at pipeline. I don’t know what this problem is here. Maybe he took
beating first time out or something. Still, I think you need to chill.We don’t need the guy wanting to die over online bullying so Give him a break he didn’t make the rules any still Spanks john ,a pipe and air ariel master regularly.. So get off his sac a rema! John’s my favorite surfer, but you want us to come to talk about how lazy looks. He does it seem to give fuc if he wins or loses it?
adrenochrome.
https://i.ytimg.com/vi/tSaG…
Put your money where your ass kissing mouth is – Cuz If it’s over 6 foot he won’t even paddle for one . Sitting too far out the back pretending to wait for one, and I hope via Karma that a rogue 15 x 15 foot thick square Barrel comes right to him with everyone screaming at Flippipo Go, Go, Go. Ohh the suspense is Unbearable.. Will He 🤣 ? Only Time Will Tell.
Good piece DR! Byzantine was the perfect word to describe the convoluted selection process. Do you get your writing chops from your dad – wasn’t he a professor of some sort?
He’s going for that backside rodeo flip while getting spat heavily out of a 20 foot dry reef slab, Flipippo makes it look easy – Mark my words.
Will BG sponsor the Raw Sewage Open in OC post Hilary this week with a live feed?
maybe feed italo
After his last effort he should get a tattoo of pussy on his chest.
And we’ll most likely see that past behavior was very predictive of his future performance. Unless, as all us armchair QBs are saying, he finally puts in some time there. I don’t see why there’s more pressure in not kooking out for a medal, than in not kooking out in front of all his peers on a live webcast for the WSL. SInce he’s kooked out 3 times in front of all his peers already (and don’t forget, a 4th at the Box), I don’t think the novelty of surfing there in the Olympics, esp if it’s big, will change anything. But who knows, maybe you’ll be right!
I would suggest that Filipe gets himself ‘injured’ before the Olympics if only for the love of country.
There is no way Pip gives up his spot. It’s the fucking olympics…It’s not like he didn’t earn it. Giving up his spot is suicide. Fuck yeah he is clearly scared of Chopes, his history out there shows that. But the olympics haven’t happened yet, time is still on his side to turn things around. Last week wasn’t the week to prove it. Waves were marginal, he is seeded #1 in this ridiculous joke of a finals day, and he just watched #2 break his back out there warming up. The world title and olympic gold are two different things and last week had nothing to do with winning gold for team Brazil. He certainly wouldn’t be the first pro surfer to go from chickenshit to charger (RIP Brownie) and he undoubtedly has the skills, let’s see if he finds the balls…
Are we related?
That’s what I love about BG commenters. I feel one way after reading a post but then you get a different take, a plausible defense that makes me rethink my own views. I still think he’s a pussy but even pussies can adapt. All he has to do is meditate like Griff — um I mean surrender to Christ.
idunno. He’s had 10 years on tour to figure this one out, and remaining practice time will likely coincide with title contention. If he won’t go when the waves aren’t huge, while in competition with priority, then I don’t imagine he’ll be summoning Sean Collins’ (RIP) insights to fight in the lineup of the next big swell. But I do like your optimism because the thought of what fast-twitch talent like that could do in heavy waves is enticing. Hope you’re right.
Damn you Disqus for stuffing up my comment. Here goes again:
If you go to the ISA web site it’s very easy to download the criteria. The key point is section D where it spells out who gets into the Olympics, and how.
https://isasurf.org/downloa…
Now that the CT rankings are finalized we can pick the first 10 places. A couple of guys are unlucky, but rules are rules.
1. Filipe Toledo – BRA
2. Griffin Colapinto – USA
3. Ethan Ewing – AUS
4. Joao Chianca – BRA
5. Jack Robinson – AUS
6. John John Florence – USA
7. Leonardo Fioravanti – ITA
8. Kanoa Igarashi – JPN
9. Jordy Smith – RSA
10. Matthew McGillivray – RSA
Next is continental representation. And this is where the ISA kind of stuffed up when they said Jordy had qualified for the Olympics as the highest ranked African when in fact he qualifies via CT.
11. Africa: Alan Cleland -MEX* (Spot would have gone to Teva Bouchgua from Morocco but he didn’t finish in top 30 of the WSG so apparently it goes to Cleland – this is a bit weird!!)
12. Oceania: Billy Stairmand – NZL
13. The Americas: Cody Young – CAN (even though he is actually Hawaiian, he “did a Tati” and swapped nationality)
14. Asia: Reo Inaba – JPN
15. Europe: Kauli Vaast – FRA
Next is 2024 world surfing games where the top 5 surfers (one from each continent) will qualify, but only provided their nation has not already got 2 surfers. So forget about AUS/USA/BRA/JPN/RSA as they all have 2 qualifiers. Also: the CT surfers who already qualified have to turn up and compete at this comp.
16. Africa: TBA but not from RSA
17. Oceania: TBA but not from AUS
18. Americas: TBA but not from USA/BRA
19. Asia: TBA but not from JPN
20. Europe: TBA
Next is the mythical “NOC place” for the winning team at the 2024 WSG. This is where Kelly (or Medina) can get the “third spot”.
21. TBA
Next is the second “NOC place” for the winning team from the 2022 WSG (which was Japan).
22. TBA Japanese surfer (not sure who!)
Next is “Host country place” but this is N/A because France already qualified Kauli Vaast. It will be therefore allocated to the highest ranked eligible surfer at the 2024 world surfing games
23. Highest placed ‘eligible’ surfer at the 2024 world surfing games.
Next is “Universality Place” which is a surfer chosen from the top 50 placing competitors in the 2023 or 2024 world surfing games. Could be anyone from a country that does not already have 2 or 3 surfers I suppose.
24. TBA but must have finished top 50 in WSG.
Couple of interesting points:
– It’s not allowed to substitute another surfer (e.g. Medina) unless the original surfer is injured or becomes inelligible (e.g. fails drug test or becomes a neo nazi).
– Because Japan won the 2022 world surfing games, if they also win the 2024 WSG, they won’t get 4x spots, the 2022 spot will go to the country that came second in 2022, which was the US.
– If your country gets 3x surfers, that third surfer can be anyone (Hi Kel), they don’t need to be the next highest ranked on the CT.
– Kelly needs the US or Japan to win the 2024 world surfing games for him to get into the Olympics. Gabby needs Brasil to win.
– If Ethan Ewing can’t compete his spot would be taken by Ryan Callinan.
This should have gone above the line … good explanation, or at least as good as can be given the criteria maze.
If you don’t recognise the Olympics are cooked your a 10 year old.
So cooked.
No gold for Brazil. Stoked for everybody else. For Brazillian fans, blame the process.
Us?
The good news is Filipe can embarrass himself at Teahupo’o on international TV
Mate, the problem is the Lion! He shouldn’t have done that…
Maybe it’s just his star sign?
When I saw this years forecast I thought he might prove us wrong. If he couldn’t pull it together this year in those conditions there is no hope for him. It’s perplexing for a guy with so much talent and a lion on his chest.