Mister Business (right) wrecking perfect surf days for Tatiana Weston-Webb. Photo: Instagram
Mister Business (right) wrecking perfect surf days for Tatiana Weston-Webb. Photo: Instagram

Beloved top pro surfer’s wedding day almost marred by racist AI!

Zuck around, find out.

Show me one person one surf fan on this planet who does not adore Tatiana Weston-Webb and I will show you a fool. The 27-year-old powerhouse, a perennial top-five on the World Surf League’s Championship Tour, has been flashing her inimitable style for years. Weston-Webb is not afraid of meaty bigness. She is not afraid to carve and rip and slay. And even though she looks like the Mother of Dragons, the extreme platinum blonde is half Brazilian.

Yes, father hails from England but discovered surfing, moved to Florida and eventually to Kauai. Mother comes to us from the land of Order and Progress.

A one-time professional bodyboarder to boot.

Weston-Webb, whose double-barreled last name is from father, was raised on the Garden Isle but now surfs Olympicly for Brazil.

Not only is Tatiana Weston-Webb a Kauai local, a Brazilian, an Olympian and a perennial top-five, she is also Jesse Mendes’s gal. Yes, the two began dating long ago, forming up a surf power duo not seen since… Jack Freestone and Alana Blanchard. Mendes, who also occasionally surfs on the World Surf League Qualifying Series, is one handsome fella. Ironically, the São Paulo resident now surfs for Italy.

To the joy of everyone, the two tied the knot over the weekend.


Mark Zuckerberg vs. Tatiana Weston-Webb Photog

Except pure evil lurked on the fringes, trying to spoil the otherwise fairytale day. The wedding photographer, Caroline Cerutti, captured the stunning beauty and penned a moving tribute in Portuguese. The English translation read, “A happy and calm bride when she saw the sun rise then since rain was forecast. Mas divide due se fosse chuva iria mudar alguma coisa. Pois pensa numa noiva leve, que viveu tudo. It was beautiful, Nxxxx.

The last bit a seemingly racist slur.

Eagle-eyed fans were quick to point out the inappropriateness of the final bit though bilingual human saint reacted.

“That translation is not accurate. W don’t say the N word like that in Brazil. Nega or “neguinha” is a very common and loving way to call good friends at the south of Brazil.”

The AI, or artificial intelligence, owned and operated by Meta chief Mark Zuckerberg clearly doing a real dirty.

The caption was quickly changed to read “Foi Linda” or “It was beautiful at the end.”

Unnecessary though since no racist business was ever used in the first place.

Should the man Kai Lenny called “Super fit. Strong, strong, strong,” be censured?


More as the story develops.

Dead whale (pictured) with wind turbines and angry Australian surfers involved. Photo: photo
Dead whale (pictured) with wind turbines and angry Australian surfers involved. Photo: photo

Australian surfers accused of promoting gruesome whale death misinformation!

"Down with big wind!"

It is generally not wise to trust surfers on matters of importance. Other than Kelly Slater, who knows more than most doctors and also has a Chinese girlfriend, surfers are generally not well-read nor particularly discerning. Used to passing disinformation onto fellow surfers under the guise of hiding “secret spots.” Fairly vacant.

And Australian surfers, let’s be honest, a touch dumber than all others save American surfers, Brazilian surfers, French surfers, and definitely South African surfers. Portuguese surfers and Chilean surfers too. Canadian surfers. Etc.

Well, as it turns out the aforementioned Australian surfers are caught up spewing alleged lies over a planned wind farm that is to be built off the New South Welsh coast. While ecologists hail the proposal as exceedingly green, the surfers have joined with fishermen, tourism operators and politicians to oppose the business over citing “whale death” as the major concern.

Signs featuring beached whales in foreground, wind turbine in background now ubiquitous around the region.

Australian Surfers Push “Wind Kills Whales” Agenda

Though, apparently, the science does not support mass whale die-off due “Puff Power.”

Quentin Hanich, the editor-in-chief of the academic journal Marine Policy and professorial fellow at the University of Wollongong, has, according to The Guardian, “spent this week debunking a fake article shared on social media that purported to be from his publication which claimed offshore wind projects in the Illawarra and Hunter would kill 400 whales a year.”

“There’s been a whole bunch of continuing dialogue that suggests that windfarms kill whales without any actual evidence to demonstrate that that’s the case,” Hanich declared.

Australian surfers, apparently, don’t care and have planned paddle-outs to call attention to all the whales probably dying.

A very powerful tool though maybe they should have considered a billboard?

Something extra funny, cheap and character-revealing?

Whatever the case, those in favor of the turbines declare that surfers are in the pockets of “Big Mine” and are stupid.

Are they?

Do you have a position vis a vis wind?

Let’s hear it!

Vans and Walmart reach settlement over retail titan “shamelessly selling copycat (Vans) shoes”

Walmart argued that Vans’ trademark rights are “weak.”

Two years ago, Vans threw their lawyers at Walmart for allegedly, well, look for yourself and you can see how allegedly it is, knocking off its famous designs. 

Vans told the US District Court the Arkansas-based retailer was “shamelessly selling copycat shoes in a direct effort to confuse consumers, unlawfully siphon sales from Vans, and intentionally damage its valuable intellectual property rights.” 

And, was “flood[ing] the market with cheap, low-quality, and confusingly similar shoes” that are little more than “blatant knockoff versions.”

Vans said the shoes were causing actual confusion among consumers “and set out claims of direct and contributory trademark infringement, unfair competition, and false designation of origin under the Lanham Act and California state law, and sought injunctive relief and monetary damages.”

Walmart argued that Vans’ trademark rights are “weak” and that consumers ain’t that dumb; that you don’t have to be real smart to tell the diff between a Walmart version of Vans’ kicks and the real thing. 

The judge sided with the OGs, saying its designs, the side-stripe logo, the checkerboard slip-on etc, were “distinctive” and were “valid and protectable.” 

Judge also said that a “reasonably prudent consumer” is probs gonna be confused. 

The settlement was undisclosed but after two years of fighting, Vans wouldn’t have let go of that bone cheap.

Even if it ain’t owned by the late, great Pauly Van Doren anymore, the brand is as authentic as it comes. 

Van Doren, a high-school drop-out, whose nickname was Dutch the Clutch, created the Van Doren Rubber Co in 1966 with his little brother, James, who died in 2011, and their pals Gordon, Ryan Emmert and Serge D’Elia. 

The first store, in Anaheim, California, sold American-made shoes direct to the public with the slogan, “Canvas Shoes for the Entire Family” at prices between two and four dollars a pair. 

Y’don’t have to trawl too deep into a surfer or skater’s wardrobe to find a dirty ol pair of Off the Walls or Authentics, shoes mercifully unchanged in almost fifty years.

As Stacy Peralta said: “Vans is one of the greatest legacy companies not only in skateboarding, but in the worldwide community of action sports.”

Final words go, as they must, to Sean Penn, who used his own pair of  OTW  slip-ons in the movie Fast Times at Ridgemont High, a decision that would propel sales of the show into the stratosphere.

Surf fight in Brazil goes viral
Surfers in Brazil are famous for using all sorts of weaponry, surfboards, fists, tears, surprise, in surf fights.

Brutal surf fight goes viral, “One surfer broke his board, the other lost his teeth!”

Wild melee at Brazil beach rivals even the famous Smith-Goggans showdowns of yore!

How many surf fights y’seen live? As in, punches thrown, landed, carotid arteries squeezed, arms hyperextended and so on.

One of the better I’ve seen was at Burleigh Heads, a “gleaming right-breaking Australian point wave located on the subtropical Gold Coast of Queensland, set against a picturesque lava rock headland.”

A local surfer dropped in on an out-of-towner, not so much a Val, more the Emerging Intermediate. 

The Gold Coast points will forgive a multitude of sins, technique wise, and even a surfer who has yet to master rudimentary turns can appear competent on the easy long walls.

The EI didn’t say a word. The local did a roundhouse cutback off the guy and they disappeared. A few seconds later the local surfaced holding a clump of the shrieking man’s bristly yellow hair in his fist.

Across the Pacific and up the west coast at Silver Strand, a mile-long hit of sand with waves powered by an open water trench, locals created a fight club to avoid the indignity of trying to fight in the ocean. 

Punchy waves and punchy locals.

Fighting might be fun as hell, but it has its drawbacks.

Cops, litigation, prison etc.

Less so in Brazil, of course, where we find the protagonists of this surf fight.

A surfer is approached after his session by a man intent on violence, a surf fight where the advantage goes to the man who isn’t encumbered by a surfboard.

The surfer with the surfboard uses his encumbrance as his advantage in the surf fight. He  leads with a left jab and swings an effective right hook, his surfboard an extension of his fist.

Relative chaos ensues.

Comments swing both ways on the rights and wrongs of the case.

Bravo in surfing. That post surf vibe.

Skate culture=cool, friendly, inclusive
Surf culture=super duper gay

What a shame! These ain’t even surfers… a surfer is the one who sits on his board, he travels imagining how many nautical miles the wave he will take until it breaks on the stand!

It ain’t as bloody or as brutal as either of the Goggans-Smith showdowns, surf fights in all but medium, but it is equally pleasing to watch.

Guy Kawasaki (insert) and former boss Steve Jobs as envisioned by Ashton Kutcher. Photo: Jobs
Guy Kawasaki (insert) and former boss Steve Jobs as envisioned by Ashton Kutcher. Photo: Jobs

Marketing guru who put Apple on map transitions to super VAL!

“I almost called you up today to postpone this interview to go surf...”

It is no secret that the VAL, or Vulnerable Adult Learner, has wildly spiked in these the days of our surfing lives. The 30, 40, even 50-plus set discovering what was once a youthful game and giving it a go. Old dogs learning new tricks like “how to get in the way” and “poo stance.” It is inspirational in many ways and Guy Kawasaki must certainly be the most inspirational of all.

The handsome 69-year-old was born in beautiful Honolulu to a fireman father and stay-at-home mother. After graduating from ‘Iolani School, where royalty once went, he matriculated at Stanford. In 1983, Kawasaki got a job at a fledgling personal computer company called Apple as “chief evangelist.” And it was his marketing savvy that launched the “Macintosh” into hearts and minds the world over.

He has since gone on to sit on many important boards like Google, Motorola, Canva and, most importantly to him, surfboard. Yes, Mr. Guy Kawasaki discovered the “Sport of Kings” at the ripe age of 60 and now is ruled by “the tides.”

The brains behind “marketing evangelism,” now lives in Santa Cruz, owns twenty surfboards and has “now surfed almost three continents” according to a new interview in The Information. The whole thing almost got blown off, though.

“I almost called you up today to postpone this interview to go surf,” he laughed during a recent call with the interviewer. “All my meetings, interviews, podcast recordings— everything is scheduled around the tide.”

“His mind is usually half on work, and half on the Pacific Ocean, where he rarely misses an opportunity to surf the low tide,” Margaux MacColl writes before the story disappears behind the paywall.

Enough here for us to discuss though.

Firstly, is the “almost three continents” bit. How “almost?” Also how many continents have you surfed? I’ve got almost five because I thought about surfing in Brazil, when there recently, but didn’t.

Secondly, why is Kawasaki so fixated on tides? I mean, the tide is certainly important.More important depending on where one is surfing, but I consider swell more critical. Am I wrong here? Is this why my progression has stalled?

Well, that’s all I have for you.

Hope it was informative.