Dylan Graves (left) and Jed Smith (right) down in the dreggs.
Dylan Graves (left) and Jed Smith lookalikes down in the dreggs.

Byron Bay surfers in mourning after beloved music festival Splendour in the Grass cancelled without warning

Heartbreaking.

Tears in modern Australian utopia Byron Bay, this morning. A big sad energy. The bucolic costal enclave’s surfers woke up from lavender dreams to the worst news imaginable. Racing to breakfast nooks, sun dappling great grandma’s obviously vintage tablecloth, the impossibly beautiful volume enthusiasts found it almost impossible to enjoy toasted artisan sourdough yum yum, poached free range eggs, sprinkled with pink Himalayan sea salt, even tree-ripened avocados from Chris Hemsworth’s backyard.

Splendour in the Grass, you see, had been cancelled.

The yearly music festival that allowed the region’s blessed to micro dose mushrooms while swaying to the majestic chord progressions of Tame Impala has been a staple of paradise since 2001. The three day festival has drawn the likes of Negatron’s cousin Lorde and Vance Joy with former BeachGrit writer Longtom’s goats once wandering over from neighboring Lennox Heads.

Per the Australian Broadcasting Corporation:

In a statement on its Instagram page, the festival said it would be “taking the year off”, and that ticket holders would be refunded “automatically” by ticket retailer Moshtix.

The co-CEOs of Splendour organiser Secret Sounds, Jessica Ducrou and Paul Piticco, said in a statement to media they were “heartbroken” to share the news, and added they “hope to be back in the future”.

The line up, which had featured Australian music legend Kylie Minogue and obviously vintage Canadian indie band Arcade Fire, had only been announced earlier this month.

Splendour is the latest festival to call it quits in 2024, with regional touring event Groovin the Moo pulling the pin in February. Several smaller festivals have also been cancelled.

Australian folk duo The Dreggs, who were due to play on Splendour’s main stage for the first time, told Hack they only learned of the cancellation minutes before the news became public.

Unmentioned was The Goons of Doom.

Which, speaking of, yesterday, I was watching the Rip Curl Pro Bells Beach. Vaughan Deadly, the Goons lead bassist, was in the booth alongside Joe Turpel and Felicity Palmateer and had me properly LOLing which, in turn, made me even more angry at the World Surf League. Keep Joe. Whatever. But mixing Jesse Mendes in as “color?”

What sort of WSL dippity-doos are in charge of casting there in the veterinarian office? I’m certain Vaughan was a Rip Curl addition.

Should Rip Curl just take over the tour entirely?

More as that story develops.

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Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
2 years ago

Which one was sleeping with the women he was judging?

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
2 years ago

Oh dear Jen, I’m embarrassed that I have submitted you to this level of Tomfoolery. You are too sweet and simultaneously a raucous hoot.
Xox

justiceminister
justiceminister
2 years ago

These intrepid bands could relocate to Laurel Canyon I suppose. I hear they’re still doing the hippy hippy shake 24/7 over there.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
2 years ago

That’s classic!

Nego Padaratz
Nego Padaratz
2 years ago

Exhaustedly exploited, and ‘the spiritual home’ (or claimed home) of every Australian musician since the advent of social media platforms. Byron’s tired, and everyone’s tired of Byron. Splendour started losing the room when they started booking zoomer centric line ups, add post covid apathy, and then choosing to run a few months after once in 500 year floods with the added spice of a east coast low on the weekend of the festival. Running against the advice of the state emergency service. Not to mention the now foreign ownership (live nation). They can’t even be honest about the cancelation… poor ticket sales. RIP Splendour.

Ando
Ando
2 years ago
Reply to  Nego Padaratz

Byron is done for all but the most basic people.

Too expensive, too crowded, too dumb, too fake.

A ghetto for wankers.

Truth
Truth
2 years ago
Reply to  Ando

Been like this for a long time.

Brutus
Brutus
2 years ago

ah , what’s a lead bassist?

Should Rip Curl start trying to make a special division for sasha for their market?

Truth
Truth
2 years ago
Reply to  Brutus

No. This fads gunna die down

Blokes will wish they kept their cocks

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
2 years ago
Reply to  Truth

Derek will correct me but the trans crowd all stand up to piss, i think?

Save Don Hearn's Cabins
Save Don Hearn's Cabins
2 years ago

Sorry to comment bomb… any of you from NSW would know of Green Island and the iconic Don Hearn’s Cabins that were built by Don using 2nd and 3rd hand materials between bongs and waves. It was not only a place for surfers but also, at the time, for draft dodgers of the Vietnam War. The NSW Govt. wants to take a wrecking ball to them, and we’re fighting to stop them. If you’re from NSW, please sign the e-petition. There are very few old-school joints like this left!

https://www.parliament.nsw.gov.au/la/Pages/ePetition-details.aspx?q=xNJEUL8-dzkpDf3rshIhXA

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
2 years ago

When the singing budgie from tha 80s is headliner , ya fuked.

Ando
Ando
2 years ago

Exactly, it was a sad sad lineup

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
2 years ago

Australian’s have never seen a thrift store they haven’t liked.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
2 years ago

The no comeback comeback post. 👍🏻

@surfads
@surfads
2 years ago

If you ever get a good wave at The Pass this is the view looking back at you from the shoulder https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

astro
astro
2 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Har, 6/metre. That’s about right.

Rich Marx
Rich Marx
2 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

“hey man when you yell at us when we’re about to take off in front of you it really ruins the vibe of the lineup”

RQ.
RQ.
2 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Or buy a coffee in Raglan.

Cuntry Singer
Cuntry Singer
2 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

West Hollywood bogans?

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago

Developing my Aussie slang vocabulary has never made me smarter, but it’s sure made me laugh a lot over the years.

I had an Aussie roommate for a while in Solana Beach. We would take him to bars and within minutes, he would have an audience hanging on his every word. 😆

astro
astro
2 years ago

Dognuts v may be a new fanciful take on an old expression.
It just means “looks like a mess” in its common usage.

Rocks local
Rocks local
2 years ago
Reply to  astro

definitely an old expression. Been hearing it since at least the 80s, ‘just a mess’ is the proper interpretation, at least pre Dognuts spin

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago

At least they’re not wearing purple Hokas when they’re not running a 10k. Douchey as they are, I’ll give them that. 🤣

Barrelled
Barrelled
2 years ago
Reply to  No Feelings

You gotta admit Hoka’s are comfortable as all get up.

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

Bare feet are better.

Reminds me of the time a bunch of us sat in the back of the Carl’s Junior above Trestles and passed around a single shirt and some flip flops to whoever went up front to order.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
2 years ago
Reply to  No Feelings

barefoot is best for walking around in the supermarket (especially the refrigerated area) and freaking out all the foreigners.

Barefoot running was huge until everyone realised it fucking hurts.

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
2 years ago

Been kicked out of two French supermarkets and a fucken poser surf shop barefoot.
15 minutes after surfing nude!
Xox

deeks
deeks
2 years ago
Reply to  Dogsnuts

We used to steal trolley loads from the hossegor supermache barefoot no probs. But when the Marseilles boys did a runner from the surf shop they were wishing they had shoes on that day

Rocks local
Rocks local
2 years ago
Reply to  No Feelings

hard to beat Hoka comfort. Definitely better than bare feet for me these days.

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago
Reply to  Rocks local

Yeah, my feet got so messed up by shoes that I would go barefoot everywhere if I could.

I had extremely painful plantar fasciitis and if you ran a finger down the sole of my foot, the scar tissue felt like a rope. The surgery isn’t great, as it’s painful and often the problem returns soon.

So I ran barefoot or in barefoot shoes just for protection against sharp shit on the ground. It was painful AF and when I would break through a new bit of scar tissue, I sometimes had to thumb a ride back.

But it worked. I haven’t had the problem since. My feet are stronger and I broke up all the scar tissue but by bit.

I even got custom flat hiking boots that let my feet flex and feel the ground.

I hear really great things about Hokas, but I never want to go through all that shit again, so structured shoes scare me. I tend to go barefoot when possible, wear classic flat no-cushion Vans otherwise, or my boots. I do use running shoes for training, lifting shoes for lifting, etc. but they come off as soon as I’m not doing the activity, like they’re snowboard boots or something. 🙂

Rocks local
Rocks local
2 years ago
Reply to  No Feelings

you’ve probably seen it, but ‘Born to Run’ is a great book on the barefoot running stuff, makes a lot of your points

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
2 years ago
Reply to  No Feelings

There’s a whole generation of guys with foot problems due to wearing nike or reebok running shoes as daily walking shoes for like 20 years, myself included.

Im talking 90s era and onwards. If you weren’t wearing vans, its what you wore.

Problem is, the cushioning in the heel meant you were effectively walking in high heels every day and that gives you weak calves over time.

I tried some zero drop (no difference in height from toe to heel) and immediately started getting torn calves. This is the main problem with barefoot running and vibrams. If your body isnt ready for it (as a runner), you can injure yourself. Probably not so much of an issue if youve been wearing vans day in day out.

Hokkas are great for people getting in to (or back into) running, they are extremely comfortable. Only brand that comes close is asics.

I run in different shoes but im a marathoner amd putting huge miles in squishy shoes like hokka wears them out too quick.

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago

Yeah, stretching out my calves was a part of the process. Painful sometimes. Probably got some tears.

I’ve never been a runner, really. I just did it to fix things.

I wore nothing but Vans and huaraches from Northern Baja for a long time. Never had any foot issues. Then I got older, made some money, and bought more expensive athletic shoes. Big mistake.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
2 years ago

Its official. I am hanging up the bags and opening up a string of Super Cuts and Fantastic Sams down there. I will start in the Byron area and from there spider web my way through the lucky country. Once the money starts rolling in I will fly you all out to Dubai for a wave tank take over. Stay tuned.

Happy Camper
Happy Camper
2 years ago
Reply to  Sean Connery

business is all about supply and demand.

now as far as locks of hair go, plenty of the long unwashed uncombed scraggle in Byron.
as far as demand goes to cut unwashed uncombed scraggle; minimal, although if you specialize in dreading hair, it may work

that said, now that the Splendour is no longer, maybe the foul ones will be getting off their asses, dusting off their CV’s and flocking to Indeed, and thus would need civilized haircuts.

either way, best wishes….and don’t forget to stock up on Fabreeze. the body order hangs heavy over Byron.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
2 years ago
Reply to  Happy Camper

I will be teaming up with Febreze and they will be available in store.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
2 years ago

That’s a cartoon so not you. You’d be way greyer and saggy.

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
2 years ago

Are there literally no barbershops in Oz?

Barrelled
Barrelled
2 years ago
Reply to  Sean Connery

Graves ain’t from Oz, he’s Puerto Rican.

Rocks local
Rocks local
2 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

true fact

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
2 years ago

Post up a photo of yourself Grandpa.

Barrelled
Barrelled
2 years ago

Why the hell does anyone think a moustache looks good on them? All it does is make you look like a shady 80’s pornstar (or a firefighter).

Happy Camper
Happy Camper
2 years ago
Reply to  Barrelled

…or Hitler

Barrelled
Barrelled
2 years ago
Reply to  Happy Camper

Only if you keep the width within the nostrils.

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago

They look like every hipster musician in the world. Douchy and boring. Chas and you nailed it.

If I were not an anarchist, I would want banjos outlawed.


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