“My trauma manifested into a default mindset for me to be a runner - specifically, run away, escape, and protect myself.”
The former WSL chief Erik Logan, whose almost five-year tenure as pro surfing’s north star was cut short on a moody June day in 2023 with no reason given, has continued his run of confessionals on his wildly addictive Substack.
One week ago, Erik Logan posted a lengthy screed detailing his cataclysmic descent from 42-year-old beginner surfer, loving everything surf, to architect of the entire sport with all its ensuring baggage. Stroke, heart surgery, divorce, losing his WSL job and surprise pivot from surfing and into tennis!
“We’ve all been told, ‘Do what you love, and you’ll never work a day in your life.’ Or maybe, ‘Follow your passion; the money will follow you.’ There are countless variations on this theme,” wrote Erik Logan.
“Throughout my career, I let this idea guide my professional choices, and tried to make my job my passion. The reality was that I was passionate about my work, but it was never my burning passion. Four years ago, I took a passion that I had discovered and made it my job and I can now say I’m not 100% sure this cliche is the best advice, at least for me.”
In today’s confessional Erik Logan, who may look like a doll but who ain’t stupid, mines his childhood trauma.
“My childhood was complicated. All of us have different issues from childhood, so I’m not assuming mine was any more or less special than anyone else’s. Any abuse you experience as a child shapes you for decades to come. Whether it is verbal, emotional, or physical, it all takes a toll on you, primarily if you never deal with the trauma properly. My trauma manifested into a default mindset for me to be a runner – specifically, run away, escape, and protect myself. Run from everything: problems, unhappiness, whatever I didn’t like – shut down and run.”
And,
“My coping mechanism for trauma at a young age was using my feet to get running. The physical running also spilled over into emotional running, leading to avoidance, shutting down, and countless other not-so-great personality traits. My therapist, whom I will call Jennifer (in honor of Dr. Melfi from The Sopranos), now has lifetime employment and works with me weekly on this trauma. A lifetime of conditioned reactions to stress or trauma means that I react by running (physically) or emotionally (shutting down) at times still to this day.”
Clues to the disappearance of Erik Logan? Forced to run, escape and protect from WSL trauma?
