Kelly Slater. Great.
Kelly Slater. Great.

Petition circulates demanding “saint” Kelly Slater be allowed to surf the Olympics

"I encourage you to find other things you care about within change.org once you’ve signed this."

Kelly Slater’s twenty-seventh annual retirement tour is only just getting underway and it has already been one of the greatest in recent memory. From the outpouring of affection for the 11 x surf champion to the wildcards he has been gifted which will allow him to retire next year again, the mise-en-scene has been nothing short of spectacular.

Well, when it rains it pours and things are getting better. Overnight, a petition began circulating demanding that the greatest to ever wear a professional surfing singlet be allowed to compete in this summer’s Olympiad. Righting a wrong.

New Zealander Paul Whitaker, taking to change.org, writes:

Kia ora/hi

First up, this isn’t about addressing injustice or anything like and death. This is about making this year’s Olympics as interesting and enjoyable as possible from a surfer’s perspective and about giving something back to the G.O.A.T. I encourage you to find other things you care about within change.org once you’ve signed this.

Kelly Slater is the greatest competitive surfer of all time. You can find a brief bio about him on the Olympics website. The vast majority of surfers and surfing fans would love to see Kelly Slater surfing @ Teahupoo in this year’s Olympic games. This includes other competitors – they’d either love to compete against him because doing so, in Tahiti is likely to be the highlight of their competitive surfing career…or, if they don’t want to surf against him it’s probably because they know he could beat them.

Kelly hasn’t qualified via standard processes but it might not be too late for the International Olympics Committee to adjust entry criteria to accommodate him. Some may feel this wouldn’t be fair to others. On the flipside – if the Olympics exist in order to showcase the best talent in any given arena I feel allowing Slater to surf in this year’s games would allow the committee to show they know how to achieve their goal. Please sign if you agree.

Well, do you?

Please sign anyhow.

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Gadoot
Gadoot
2 years ago

He could surf for Syria like Kanoa surfs for Japan

Shredy Kruger
Shredy Kruger
2 years ago

Special Olympics for sure!….

Ron
Ron
2 years ago

How much lower can beach grit really go, I catch these wannabe overly verbose yet poor excuses for anything journalistic pleas as click bait surmounted taskings to enthrall poorly a dying venue. See I too can command the language at will, idiots. This is insulting, even posting such arbitrary nonsense is demeaning and I truly hope the real … real world surf community disavows such rhetoric. Suggesting that a petition would or could grant someone entry into an Olympics unqualified is rather disturbing, publishing such to fill an astoundingly absurd ego is moreso. Apparently a couple years of Logans antics has stripped this site of any worthwhile pursuits of journalistic integrity, hell it’s pretty much just collapsed any hopes of just actually… interesting, or relevant material associated with the world of surfing.

deeks
deeks
2 years ago
Reply to  Ron

Word

Dim Sim
Dim Sim
2 years ago
Reply to  Ron

You could try increasing your fibre intake.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
2 years ago
Reply to  Ron

No way,
Beach grit is pythonesque!!

k55
k55
2 years ago

Dirk may pull some strings for him.

7dollarsurfboard
7dollarsurfboard
2 years ago

If signing this petition means Kelly will achieve his dream of surfing in the Olympics and officially retire from the limelight then its worth it but knowing Kelly, he can’t be trusted.

Top Cunt
Top Cunt
2 years ago

Why don’t we just give him the gold medal now so everyone can shut up about it.
If he doesn’t go through the process the way everybody else does. It’s just not fair, if you want to see Kelly surf…go see him Surf, but for some reason if he got in and if he won, there’d be a huge Asterix by his name.
The point of difference between the ISA and the WSL is Kelly IS the WSL. WSL is in bed with Kelly and they bend and break the rules for Kelly all the time to gain more eyeballs. What’s refreshing about the ISA is they stick to their guns and it’s a lovely… because there’s no Kelly.

astro
astro
2 years ago

Time for an oldie but a goodie.
A gift for all Slater fanbois…. Print it. Hang on your mantelpiece.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Cr: Jordy’s Pout iirc

notsurfingtoday
notsurfingtoday
2 years ago
Reply to  astro

Possibly influenced by his pregnancy

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…

Headhighandfuckemall
Headhighandfuckemall
2 years ago
k55
k55
2 years ago

Won’t be signing it, but could we please get a petition banning him from social media…

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
2 years ago

Jesus. This Pauly guy really has a hard on for the goat.

7dollarsurfboard
7dollarsurfboard
2 years ago
Reply to  Sean Connery

He could be arabic.

Mapski
Mapski
2 years ago

Bags of cash gets things done with the Olympic commitee. Petitions are for amatuers.

7dollarsurfboard
7dollarsurfboard
2 years ago
Reply to  Mapski

… gofundme for pros

Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
Derek Hynd's Missing Fins
2 years ago

So you’re saying we needed a change.org petition for DSS and Negs would have reinstated him?

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
2 years ago

…or that Brazilian surfers need change.org petitions to reverse WSL judging decisions?

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
2 years ago

Tossin’ out a non-sequitar…re: Olympic drug testing. “Just say no says the Nancy’s, Karen’s, Sasha’s…et al.” Let’s hum a spritual tune together kids ’cause We cannot petition the lord with prayer. Let’s let the WSL judges piss in a cup for proof of sobriety while the surfer’s are gettin’ off on ayayusca, steroids, thai stick and CBD and going ‘freestyle…’

ValiantScorn
ValiantScorn
2 years ago

If this guy wants to REALLy make a name for himself on the way out the door, then he and EVERYBODY else won’t surf Chopes during a “contest format”. You sob’s have danced around the World the last 20 years talking about climate, and all that psycho Earth talk. I think he shouldn’t be offered a microphone any more if he surfs there in competition. Come on you virtue signaling, twatwads. Prove all that lip service about “Earth/climate” is real.

#boycottChopescomps

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
2 years ago
Reply to  ValiantScorn

He knows its bullshit and that weed loves carbon, and he loves cbd dik balm

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
2 years ago

heroes are becoming hard to find…

deeks
deeks
2 years ago
Abscessed Llama
Abscessed Llama
2 years ago

His Chinese girlfriend needs him at home..

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago

The only place he will never be.

No Feelings
No Feelings
2 years ago

It might not be too late to declare Slater to be a country and let him compete under its flag.

I’m a bit surprised that Slater himself hasn’t proposed this to the IOC.

Noncompetitor
Noncompetitor
2 years ago
Reply to  No Feelings

He could surf for Typhoon Lagoon

justiceminister
justiceminister
2 years ago

KS would pull off the biggest most radical manoeuvre in his never ending career if he can blag a wildcard from the Olympic movers and shakers.


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