Sad day.
Almost one month ago, surf fans were delighted to learn that Anthony Kiedis was out and about, surfing, with a much younger Brazilian model-girlfriend. In photographs obtained by the Daily Mail, the Red Hot Chili Pepper was lauded for his “taut torso and tattooed torso” while carrying enough foam for him, his much younger Brazilian model-girlfriend and a 350 lbs adult male.
Alas, the whole business was, apparently, a ruse. The pictorials were actually from over a decade ago and featured much younger Australian model-girlfriend Helena Vestergaard who, to be honest, doesn’t sound Australian at all. In any case, the mess up has spiked interest in the Californicator’s surfing and love lives, though the two seem to mix from time to time.
Y! Entertainment is openly declaring that the last much younger model-girlfriend Anthony Kiedis was with came from Ukraine and named Marina Mazepa. The two were spotted surfing, canoodling and otherwise carrying on but that was all the way back in 2022. Vesergaard preceded Mazepa who was, in turn preceded by Heidi Klum, who needs no introduction.
The reason for all the confusion is the specific lack of public love-surf interest in the even as his biopic theoretically shoots. Based on the memoir Scar Tissue, and being produced by Brian Grazer, the film will certainly bring a bevy of surf hungry much younger model-girlfriends to Kiedis’ door but did I ever tell you about the time I had lunch with Brian Grazer?
The Hollywood heavy had read some action-adventure Middle East articles by me and my best friend, a few decades ago, and invited us to his office where his assistant proceeded to order fancy salads while Grazer asked us questions. He was nice enough, curious, energetic. After lunch ended, my best friend and I were leaving when he stopped us. Holding up a pair of brand new G-Unit jeans he had just received, Grazer asked, “Are these cool?”
My best friend and I both answered, “Not for you.”
And that was the end of that.