Kiel Russ on tying leashes.
Surf expert Kiel Russ and the short video that drove core lords mad.

Reaction to viral legrope tying tutorial reveals deep schism in surf culture

"Thanks for showing people this, now we know who to drop in on before they paddle out."

It was the most innocuous of Instagram posts and in a normal sorta world a brother would stroll right on by with only the slightest raise of an eyebrow.

Kiel Russ is a surf coach from Alberta, Canada, who has collected almost half-a-million Instagram followers drawn by his easy-to-understand reels. In short catchy numbers, Russ explaining how to repair a faulty duck dive, the correct technique for the turtle roll, secret techniques that only pro’s know, the ubiquitous pop-up tutorials and, recently, the dangers of coiling your leash around your fins.

And it is here where the deep schism that is roiling surf culture, or what might roughly be called a culture, has been laid bare.

Russ warns surfers not to coil your leash around your fins post-surf because it will damage the cord as it rubs against the blunt leading edge of your front fins and when you do use it, well, it gonna tangle around your hooves and interfere with your pop-up.

Kiel Russ on how to tie a lerope around board.
Kiel Russ explains the dangers of wrapping your leash around the fins, an innocuous enough post except it squares core lords, sea dogs, whatever you wanna call lifetime surfers, against the modern VAL.

A quick aside: When did the obsession with pop-ups begin? When the over-forties bankers starting getting into surf? Did The Inertia birth the obsession?

Russ then recommends and demonstrates a method popular in the nineteen-seventies where the leash is stretched and tied around the nose and then hoiked up until it’s tight like a recalcitrant pair of pants.

And it’s this that drew the ol sea dogs into a shootout with the modern VAL.

Old school:

From the Greenroom Times, Thanks for showing people this, now we know who to drop in on before they paddle out

40 plus years and always wrapped the leash around the board, never took it off, and never had a problem

Best of luck to you buddy but leave advice/ surf content to real surfers

VAL:

This puts a kink in it as well. The best thing is to just take it off every time you surf and put it in a bin with the rest of your leashes when you get home. Make sure to rinse them off. Carry it in your hand until you get to the water edge, put it on the board and your leash will last a long time.

That’s how I tie my leash so I can carry my longboard over my shoulder using it. Short arms and all.

Just remove it and rinse out the swivels too, leash will last much longer.

Been surfing for 3 years and I didnt know this, now I understand why Im not taking waves. Hope I start taking waves after changing the fins!

There’s a whole thread on reddit about Kiel Russ, master surf coach, although very expensive to employ!

I booked a consultation with him (I’m a beginner and trying to progress as much as possible).
I had to fill in a form when booking my initial call, the last question stated “are you willing to invest $500 – $1000 in your surfing at the end of the call?”. Naturally, I answered “no”, as I wanted to have the initial meeting first so I could decide whether or not the fee was justified. I received several emails since submitting the form stating my consultation was confirmed etc. only to receive an email one day in advance cancelling it, due to the fact that I wasn’t willing to commit to an investment at the end of the call. Strange business strategy on their behalf. Plenty of other surf/conditioning coaches online that I’m sure will be happy to take my money.

I wasn’t able to find any videos of Kiel Russ, the founder of Hydromind, surfing on Youtube. I followed up with his support team and they stated “The prices of the programs vary depending on your needs. We’ll determine your goals and what program suits you best. It ranges from $500 to $1000, with Free Bands sent to your delivery address.

I read the knocks on him not being a great surfer, I ignored that because I think the best players dont always make the best coaches, and with a month-by-month membership on offer I didnt have too much to lose. The program is more about surfing fitness which is where I’m lacking at the moment. Having not really surfed for about 15 years but looking to get back into it my surf fitness is down, and having two kids, running a business etc I dont have the time to surf multiple times a week. I know the only way you are going to get good at surfing is by surfing, so this program is defintely aimed at people like him (Kiel) who seem to have irregular access to surf and want to maintain fitness/flexibility when not in the water. If you can surf multiple times a week you wouldn’t need his program. Early red flags, I did sign up to a month-by-month membership with some free bands (he uses for his paddle exercises and have made an improvement in my paddle endurance and effectiveness so far) but there is no way I can see where it shows how to cancel the membership. It’s easy enough to block a credit card from future payments which is always the failsafe but making it hard for people to cancel is always a bad sign. From seeing comments I think I have to DM him somehow, and I dont know what roadblocks they will put in my way to cancel.

Have you ever considered shelling over cash so a man from Instagram can make you shred?

And with the legrope tying matter, who ties? And if you do, are you a surf-hat and poncho wearer?

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"Gnarly" Charley Hajek. Brave. Photo: Hajek.
"Gnarly" Charley Hajek. Brave. Photo: Hajek.

Nasty bull shark nearly chews foot off 18-time East Coast surfing champ

“I went to stand up. When I put the pressure on my leg: boom. All the blood was just pouring out of my leg."

Sharks, man. If it is not Topangry locals causing maximum physical damage, out in the surf lineup, then it’s sharks and especially in Florida. The Sunshine State, which has become a haven for all manner of the criminally-minded, has been in the news, recently, for Diddy’s “freak-offs” but up the coast near New Smyrna a different sort of freak slithers beneath the Atlantic’s surface.

Not just regular ol’ sharks but bull sharks.

These mean bastards are known for actually enjoying the taste of human flesh, as opposed to merely tolerating it, and, over the weekend, one nearly feasted upon a royal hoof.

The foot of 18-time East Coast surfing champion “Gnarly” Charley Hajek. Now, the 62-year-old was in the midst of a 148 days of surfing ironman streak when disaster struck. “Nobody’s out, the waves are firing, it’s pumping, I’m surfing for two hours, having the best time of my life,” the feisty blonde explained to the local news.

It was around 11 am on a warm Sunday morning and Hajek was finishing up, taking a wave to the send. In knee deep water, he hopped off and, as he continues, “I could tell I was on top of something. That split second I go ‘Oh (expletive) I bet I’m on a shark.’ By the time I even thought of that, it bit me so fast. It was so quick and the thrust was so powerful that when I was in his mouth for that split second, it bit down on me and let me go. And then I said ‘Oh (expletive)’ so I jumped up on my board and the shark must have hauled ass cause he was scared.”

Initially, the highly decorated champ didn’t want to look down… “But I gotta look at it. So I looked at it, and I didn’t see nothing like, ‘Oh my God, I got lucky. Just bumped into me or something.’”

The fortunate feeling did not last.

“I went to stand up. When I put the pressure on my leg: boom. All the blood was just pouring out of my leg,” he said with a chuckle.

After fashioning a leash tourniquet, Hajek drove himself to the hospital where he learned the nasty bull missed his Achilles tendon by inches. Yet while ending the ironman streak, the encounter has not dampened a profound love of surfing.

“I’m not mad. I’m not pissed off. I stepped on a shark. What’s gonna happen?” he philosophized. “That was Henry. Henry don’t like me because I don’t give him enough attention.”

And as soon as the stitches come out… “I’m going to surf harder than ever.”

Freak on, dear friend. Freak on.

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Sprawling beach house overlooking “long, fast, exquisitely tapered righthand point” lists for $167k

Wait, gotta be a catch? No? Well, kinda…

The gorgeous holiday hamlet of Jeffreys Bay on South Africa’s eastern cape, very famous for its “long, fast, exquisitely tapered right-breaking point surf”, has long gripped the hearts of local and visiting surfers.

As Warshaw describes in his lovingly maintained historical showcase, the Encyclopedia of Surfing. 

Jeffreys Bay was a showcase wave from the beginning. Gavin Rudolph, Jonathan Paarman, Peers Pittard, and Bunker Spreckels were among the early standouts. Terry Fitzgerald, the 1971 Australian champion and aptly nicknamed “Sultan of Speed,” was magnificent at Jeffreys Bay throughout the ’70s, linking one blistering turn to the next. 1977 world champion Shaun Tomson was for years the standout Jeffreys rider, placing himself deep inside the tube almost at will and driving his board into a wide range of turns. Mark Occhilupo of Australia, during his world tour debut in 1984, was one of the first goofy-foot surfers to match the regularfooters at Jeffreys Bay.

Downside, of course, are the husky Great Whites that patrol the area and, Fanning aside, death by shark attack isn’t an abstract concept, although its been a decade Burgert van der Westhuizen was killed there. 

Living in South Africa is real cheap, the consequence of a few things: a fragile currency, a crime scene that has to be experienced to be believed, although J-Bay defs ain’t the worst, low wages and therefore low operating costs, political instability, a lack of foreign investment ’cause the place feels like it can be a bit of a tinderbox and then there’s the lingering hate for Whitey that ain’t going awaydddd. 

But, what’s all that matter when you’re living in a mansion a five-minute walk from Super Tubes via a direct track to the beach and you get a hunk of change back from 200k? 

The joint ain’t pretty but it’s pretty damn big. 

Retire and hone your glide, as the old men call it.

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Topanga assault (pictured) and complete lack of remorse by the perp (insert). Photo: Instagram
Topanga assault (pictured) and complete lack of remorse by the perp (insert). Photo: Instagram

Police on high alert after vicious surf assault in Topanga lineup!

"Talk about Topangry!'"

Southern California, as mentioned, is in the middle of a flat spell so brutal, so altogether miserable as to have surfers either terminally depressed or filled with uncomfortable feelings. There are no waves nor any hope of waves, Surfline’s week forecast calling for 0 -1 ft and fair from San Diego to all the way to Ventura.

Bleak.

Bleak, and sad or sad-mad, which might explain the absolutely brutal surf brawl that broke out at Los Angeles’ Topanga Beach yesterday afternoon.

Video footage has leaked of one longboarder, riding a 0 – 1 ft wave, coming up behind another longboarder, this one a local favorite, on the same wave, and pushing him with such force, such vicious power as to send ripples of fear up and down the coast.

Topanga Lou, the wave’s “official photographer,” captured the moment and described exactly what happened.

This barney grabbed and threw Mitt off his board on Friday, 9-20-24. Then barney screamed and cussed at Mitt trying to get him to go on the beach to fight him. Barney was yelled at to go home! This barney was dropping in and snaking everybody stealing waves right and left. he had no respect for the line-up! this is clearly Assault!

Mitt did speak to him prior to this , telling him to slow down & to stop dropping in on surfers. Barney just screamed & cussed Mitt out. Mitt, did what any surfer with as many yrs experience would do…he showed him not to do it. Barney’s response was to grab Mitt & throw him off his board. Followed with screaming & cussing at Mitt.

This barney did these exact same things the week before this at the bu. barney is a repeat offender!

Last year, there was a radio show about “Topangry”. That the locals are all “Topangry”. I’ve never seen this barney surf at Topanga Beach before. Talk about “Topangry”!?!

Mitt is a local who has been surfing at Topanga Beach for many, many years. He’s also very well respected and loved.

Police, no doubt, on high alert.

If you were in Mitt’s place, how would you react?

Know before you go.

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Florida surfer (pictured) getting knocked out underwater.
Florida surfer (pictured) getting knocked out underwater.

Surfers scramble to identify inspiration for “Floridian daredevil knocked unconscious in water” on Rescue: HI-Surf premier!

“The most dangerous wave in the world, cresting in shallow water over a bed of rocks."

American surfers were giddy with anticipation, last night, for the last football game to end. Usually, American surfers spend their Sunday evenings being sad about Jacksonville Jaguar, Los Angeles Charger, San Francisco 49er losses and carry Modelo hangovers with them to an early bedtime. Last night was the same, save the Jags not playing. They will lose later this eve. No, last night thrill percolated for a new surf drama was set to premier on Fox.

Rescue: HI-Surf.

The program follows a group of intrepid lifeguards patrolling Oahu’s North Shore which, of course, includes “the most dangerous wave in the world, cresting in shallow water over a bed of rocks.”

Must see TV.

Now, I somehow missed the opener, but the tepid review this morning gave me much to consider. Variety declared it to be an “average workplace drama, but with an exceptional tropical location” though praised the restraint in storyline. Namely, a baby did not get stuck in a pipe, either real or metaphysical, the action of the pilot instead centering around “a Floridian daredevil knocked unconscious in the water.”

Surf fans immediately attempted to guess who the surfer was based upon.

Caroline Marks is from Florida but not a daredevil.

Filipe Toledo is not from Florida nor a daredevil.

Ben Gravy is from New Jersey, Cory Lopez has hung up the singlet, Kelly Slater doesn’t get knocked unconscious.

Did anyone watch?

Help would be appreciated.

Enjoy the trailer, in any case, here.

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