Machine Gun Kelly Slater. Photo: Instagram
Machine Gun Kelly Slater. Photo: Instagram

Surf great Kelly Slater offers sage advice after undergoing special forces weapons training

"When your brain is in the way, it slows you down."

Kelly Slater’s surf bonafides need not one bit of burnishing. Seven-time Pipe Master, one-time Pro Pipeline, eleven world championships, one Eddie and this is not to mention multiple “Surfer of the Year” nominations plus magazine covers. His legion fans are also well aware that the almost 53-year-old is a golf whizz, guitar master and sings like an angel.

Kelly Slater Sings One Love

Not yet witnessed is Slater’s skill with a gun. Rootin’, tootin’, shootin’. Thankfully, the Special Forces Charitable Foundation put a pistol in his hand and let him rip the range.

Watch here.

Afterward, the father of two opened up about the experience, sharing “(Shooting) is not familial to me, shot when I was a kid but haven’t shot in decades. Have to make it your natural environment in order to compete at 100 percent. When I surf I don’t think, my brains not in the way. With anything else, your brain is in the way and it slows you down.”

Wise words.

But how would you rate your own skills with lock, stock and barrel? Would you beat Kelly Slater in a shoot-off?

Would you gloat?

Rude.

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Cuntry Singer
Cuntry Singer
1 year ago
Scott J Anderson
Scott J Anderson
1 year ago

Not bad for a single day’s training.

Offhand grip got a floaty finger, and locked-out elbows are the stinkbug stance of shooting.

The freak-outs in the comments are well worth the time

SaltyHB
SaltyHB
1 year ago

Prepping for the Armageddon they seem to want.

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago

*Dork of the Year.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
1 year ago

Someone please get that falling down pic and photoshop Kelly’s head on it.

pipspuss
pipspuss
1 year ago

That’s it, I’ve got it. The kids name is gonna be Shooter.

Rocks local
Rocks local
1 year ago

knew a guy a few years ago who took me out to Xe’s base, hit their range with some automatic weapons … was pretty entertaining. But the civilian stuff less so.

tim_nelsen
tim_nelsen
1 year ago

Janie got kelly a gun; machine gun kelly; kelly’s heroes; to the dubai prince ‘pull’~ Kelly’s skeet kills birds (and the occasional photog); Kelly issues statement: “I’m joining Tulsi’s war…”

my kid is named after Matt…Warchild!

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago
Reply to  tim_nelsen

Kell ‘Em All!

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
1 year ago
Reply to  Stick man

Johnny Rico!

Paul Cunningham
Paul Cunningham
1 year ago

He keeps digging himself a deeper hole every day it seems.

Beef & Beer
Beef & Beer
1 year ago

In his old book he says he used to shoot ‘gators whenever there was no surf in Florida

He musta shotta lotta ‘gators…

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago
Reply to  Beef & Beer

ahh man you didn’t see that episode of Swamp People?

Mapski
Mapski
1 year ago

He looks more like Curren every day.

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago
Reply to  Mapski

How dare you…

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
1 year ago

Last time I went shooting was with my father in law and brother in law. Passionate, responsible gun owners. When we were done I said… wow…. we sure went through a lot of ammo! Brother in law goes yeah that was probably $500 worth. Ammo isn’t cheap! That’s when I sat there, looking off into the distance at the sand hills, beer cans, make shift targets, burned out vehicles and thought to myself… That wasn’t $500 worth of fun.

JSC
JSC
1 year ago

He’s from Florida. No other explanation needed.

Florida Man don’t need no damn brain. Just gets in the way of being Florida Man.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
1 year ago

I’d love to take Kelly to the gun range and we could go through the usual pistols, the AR(Colt of course) while finishing with my favorite:
https://youtu.be/UoFikuoIwLw?si=S6d1EzDvvfal0m0u

c4
c4
1 year ago
Reply to  Picard Madeoff

Shooting is as boring as bowling. Kinda fun for about ten minutes and that’s it.

Picard Madeoff
Picard Madeoff
1 year ago
Reply to  c4

Let me add, I suspect there are similarly unathletic types at the bowling alley as there are at the range. But I haven’t been in a bowling alley in 3 plus decades.

pipspuss
pipspuss
1 year ago
Reply to  c4

You can add shooting pool to that last and might as well throw in darts too.

Low wide stinkbug stance
Low wide stinkbug stance
1 year ago
Reply to  pipspuss

The more drunk you get, the more fun it gets?

Brutus
Brutus
1 year ago
Reply to  c4

depends who you are hunting….where’s otto when we need him?

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago
Reply to  Brutus

we don’t need him.

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
1 year ago

Can you imagine the colliloquy that takes place in the mirror?
Kelly: “Dad, what do I get for Christmas?”
Kelly: “Anything you want, son”

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
1 year ago
Reply to  Occ Topus

“I’d like a name please Dad”
“how does Turtle sound kid? Turtle Slater, I like it, you?”

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago

“Nobody listens to Turtle”

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
1 year ago

Hey! Kelly’s the best Dad he could ever have. He’s the apple of his eye. He spares himself nothing!

Dogsnuts
Dogsnuts
1 year ago

Magnum Satoshi Slater it is!
Xox

deeks
deeks
1 year ago

Rabbit at 16meters with a shitty slug gun. It’s brain got in the way

Shredy Kruger
Shredy Kruger
1 year ago

My son needs a name, but my brain is in the way. Time to surf, shoot, go to UFC, golf, hang with friends, build a new wave pool, endorse candidates, buy some more real estate….

Sean Connery
Sean Connery
1 year ago
Reply to  Shredy Kruger

He needs to drop the price on the real estate he already has.

Stick man
Stick man
1 year ago
Reply to  Sean Connery

sell the baby!

SeverelyLtd
SeverelyLtd
1 year ago

It’s a pleasant place, at least the red areas. Much caterwauling elsewhere.

“An armed society is a polite society.” Heilein

c4
c4
1 year ago
Reply to  SeverelyLtd

Sick, hopefully you’ll all stay there and don’t come to Nor Cal. Have fun with your tornadoes and rodeos.

SeverelyLtd
SeverelyLtd
1 year ago
Reply to  c4

And don’t you be sneaking into the red looking for bio women. Stick to your conviction that Transwomen are real women.

Ahi
Ahi
1 year ago
Reply to  SeverelyLtd

Best comment… spit out the coffee laughing


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