Florence brothers reveal “score of a lifetime” after chasing May 25 swell to remote Sumatra

Little Ivan Florence turns 28 and celebrates by slamming into big, empty Mentawai waves.

The two younger Florence brothers, Nathan and Ivan, have stuffed their burned-out rods into one of the best swells to slam into Indonesia since the last biggest-ever swell.

Although missing elder brother John John, who was busy marauding everyone but Italo Ferriera at Teahupoo, the pair flew to Arawa, at the northern tip of Sipura there in the famous Mentawai island chain, to chase an incoming swell, and to celebrate the twenty-eighth birthday of Ivan on May 25.

(The sell on Bilou Beach Villas, with its private boats, dreamy lil villas, self-serve kitchens etc is compelling. I’m booking!)

As you know, Prince Harry lookalike Nathan Florence is the alpha male of the squad now following his surfer of the year crown, narrowly surpassing older brother John John although a third world title in September would see the passing back of the title.

Ivan, meanwhile, who looks so much like daddy John Florence Snr, has emerged from the shadow of his overachieving oldest brother and hilariously absurdist middle bro in the past half a dozen Hawaiian seasons, proving magnetic in the water as well as the skate park, creative energies suddenly liberated.

The differing personalities Nathan describes thus, 

“Ivan is a serious little guy. Very serious little face. I’m more of the sarcastic one who’s making a joke out of everything and then John is just right in between. He can be super mature, just ’cause he has to deal with so many interviews and business-like stuff, but then at the same time he’s more immature than me and Ivan… especially when he gets drunk.”

The session contained in the video box below is the sort of thing that will have you propped up on your pillows and jiggling your hands in the air.

The moment the empty lineup swings into view. How big you wanna call those sets? Feel the staccato of your heart-beat!

Essential. 


Kourtney Kardashian’s Carpinteria surfer-neighbour Dane Reynolds releases hilarious wipeout reel

“If you eat shit on a good wave, that good wave becomes a shit wave.”

The rural idyll of former world number four surfer Dane Reynolds was broken two years ago when reality TV stars Travis Baker and Kourtney Kardashian moved in alongside his Martha Stewart inspired barn house. 

Travis Barker was the little drummer boy in Blink 182, a kinetic jack-in-the-box festooned with elaborate tattoos. The reality television series Meet the Barkers ran for two seasons in 2005 and 2006 and followed the travails of Travis, his then wife the former Miss New York and Playboy Playmate Shanna Moakler, and their two kids, Alabama and Landon.)

Kourtney Kardashian is the eldest daughter of Robert Kardashian, the legal gun who got OJ Simpson off an impossible to defend double-murder charge, and whose big sister is Kim Kardashian, a former POV porn star who was once married to the eccentric chanteur Kanye West.

In his latest instalment for Chapter 11 TV, which is woefully undersubscribed given the quality of the deliveries, we are gifted a wipeout reel from in and  around Carpinteria and starring Josiah Amico and Tommy Mckeown.

“If you eat shit on a good wave, that good wave becomes a shit wave,” writes Dane Reynolds. Midway through we put in a tribute clip to Harry Bryant’s film “Motel Hell Namibia Section” by Dave Fox,” adds Dane. “No milk involved.”

Unmissable.


Caity Simmers, best surfer in the world.
"Caity Simmers is mesmerizing to watch. A round of applause to Miss Caity Simmers!"

“Youth inferno” Caity Simmers lays fresh claim to title of best female surfer in the world with jaw-dropping B-sides edit

"Caity Simmers is the most talented woman surfer ever. Not many surfers, men or women, would pull half the barrels she did on this trip."

Only four months ago, the San Clemente (sharks!) teenager Caity Simmers and Australian Molly Picklum delivered the best performance ever by the gals at Pipe, with Caity beating hall-of-fame performer Picklum in perfect four-to-six-foot waves. 

“Pipeline for the fucking girls,” said Caity Simmers, in the immediate aftermath of her win. “I respect everyone who wants a part of it and I respect anyone who doesn’t want a part of it.”

Caity Simmers showed how quickly generational change was happening there previous year in Tahiti when she, and Caroline Marks, dominated the Tahiti Pro as Stephanie Gilmore “showed little interest in being there.” 

As Jen See reported,

If you watch nothing else from this finals day, watch this wave from Caity. It shows plainly her unique intuition. It’s as though Caity feels a rhythm on that wave that few others can perceive. 

Setting it up, Caity takes off from deep. The wave sections ahead of her, but she smoothly bottom turns around it. Remember now, she’s surfing backside. Caity throws a quick midface turn to line up the barrel. Then she grabs rail and pulls in.

Shooting through the crumbling lip, she makes a clean exit. She almost looks surprised that she made it. But she still remembers to throw in a quick down carve to finish it. The judges gave it a 9.23. I’m not sure what else they wanted there. Just give her the ten, you nerds!

Despite an early exit from this year’s Tahiti Pro due, mostly, to the WSL’s decision to run the gal’s elim heats in a slowing swell, Caity leads the women’s tour by a decent sorta margin. She is two k points or thereabouts, and is decent sorta bet to win the title, aged eighteen, at her home break, Lowers, in September.

A recent series of films by surf forecasting giant Surfline, and which feature Caity Simmers, demonstrate she ain’t just a contest machine.

And, this B-side edit, which you’ll wanna watch, below, has dragged male viewers’ jaws to the ground.

Caity is the most talented woman surfer ever. Not many surfers, men or women, would pull half the barrels she did on this trip. The fact that she gets more excited doing this than winning comps says a lot about her mindset. And her style is so naturally elegant and functional, sort of like Slater when he came up on the scene, nothing too flashy or hyper stylish(à la Ethan Ewing or Steph Gilmore) but just smooth and no hickups whatsoever. Mesmerizing to watch. A round of applause to miss Simmers!

You absolutely know that you had a great surf trip when the cutting room floor is covered in 9.5 to 10-point tube rides….

My appreciation for what Caity does here….. no words, just go do it some more! Fantastic stuff !

Can’t believe these are b sides. caity is a once in a generation talent.

Right now she is one of the best in the World, imagine this girl in 5 years. She improves each session, with each event… Crazy that Caity still has the potential to grow even more!

The Future is here.

Essential.

 


UFC BMF champ Max Holloway gives son Rush “greatest day of his life” at Kelly Slater’s Surf Ranch

"The daddest man on the planet!"

If you’re into cage fighting, and who ain’t now that pro surfing continues its path to self-annihilation although Tahiti may give a brief respite, you’ll have thrilled to the greatest knockout of all-time by the Hawaiian Max Holloway at UFC300 five weeks back.

Holloway has gone up a weight class and is expected to lose but instead dominates the thunder of BMF (Bad Motherfucker) belt holder Justin Gaethje.

Ten seconds on the clock. Fifth and last round. Holloway has already won the fight on points but risks everything to give his fans ten seconds of in-the-pocket stand and bang.

One second left and Gaethje is felled by a Holloway cleaver, falling with dope glazed eyes onto the canvas.

Joey Rogan describes it as the “greatest knocked out in UFC history”, which is fair, I think.

Real legend behaviour from Holloway.

Holloway, who is thirty-one, is the husband of Hawaiian surf star Alessa Quizon (once the gal of Caio Ibelli) and grew up on Oahu’s west side, famous for Sunny Garcia, Johnny Boy Gomes, Makaha and so on.

He surfs, too, enjoying sessions at the Perfect Swell tank in Japan and at the same tech in Waco, Texas, although he describes surfing as “crazier than fighting.”

Recently, Max, along with Alessa and his son Rush, were gifted a couple of days at Kelly Slater’s Surf Ranch, which included cameos from Benji Weatherley, Kalani Robb and Kelly Slater himself.

“I’m going to cry so bad because I’m so happy… my dream has come true!” says Rush, Holloway’s twelve-year-old son with his first wife Kaimana Pa’aluhi, whom he married in 2012 and divorced five years later.

Holloway looks pretty solid on the dreamy Surf Ranch walls, Alessa shreds, naturally, and lil Rush gets the tubes of his dreams.

UFC BMF champ Max Holloway treats son Rush to day at Kelly Slater’s Surf Ranch


Mixed-race Hawaiian surf star Mason Ho and Sheldon Paishon find perfect waves in “too white” Scotland

Hawaiian surfers visit cold-water destination inhabited by the most chilling demographic on earth! Da Whites!

As BeachGrit readers will already know, Scotland, that home of Braveheart, haggis, Hogmanay, bagpipes, JP Currie etc, was in the news recently over its demographics, ie, the shocking stat that ninety-five percent of the country was white.

A four-year-old speech made in the wake of the absurdity of the George Floyd imbroglio by then Scottish health minister Humza Yousaf where he argued that there were too many whites in positions of power and that Scott was “not immune to problems of structural racism” did the rounds recently, bringing joy to combatants in the press and on social media.

“In 20 years, there has not been a single black member of the Scottish Parliament, to our shame; there has not been a single woman MSP of colour, to our shame,” said Yousaf, “and the only four ethnic minority MSPs have all been Scots Asian males.”

Hawaii’s whip-slicked queen of taboo and BIPOC role model Mason Ho (seventy-five percent of his ancestry is Chinese-Hawaiian, a quarter white Americano) and his sparring partner Sheldon Paishon, who was homeless on Oahu’s westside for most of his life and whose documentary you simply must watch, experienced no problems with the local whites, however.

In this twenty-something minute long-form featurette by the great Rory Pringle, the pair frolic like pygmy whales in Scotland’s cold dark waters, so cold it’s difficult to scramble to your feet and where after your sessions you shake like a victim of Parkinson’s.

The waves are very good at times and the pair surf with courage, intelligence and absolute honesty.

Essential.