Which is Surfer and which The Inertia?

Blood Feud: Surfer vs. The Inertia!

Fists almost flew on the North Shore. Well, not fists probably but whatever.

It is the holiday season when families gather together in peaceful harmony and celebrate each other. Oh come all ye faithful, joyful and triumphant…

Unless!

Those families happen to have the surname Surfer or The Inertia then it’s blood feud time, baby!

This story came to be by way of an employee who is no longer engaged and I will re-tell as I heard because it is just too good.

In December, when the surf world gathers on Oahu’s North Shore, Surfer and The Inertia gathered there too at the Turtle Bay Resort. Zach Weisberg, founder of The Inertia, was once an editor at Surfer and felt a little miffed at the way he was let go and with some still in the Surfer family. “They’re all kooks…” he told his charges as he buttoned up his fresh Hawaiian shirt. “Yeah kooks…” his main lieutenant responded as he also buttoned up his fresh Hawaiian shirt.

The Inertia crew then made their way to Turtle Bay’s ballroom for Surfer Poll. They were, in fact, all wearing Hawaiian shirts (true) and as they walked shoulder to shoulder the main lieutenant grabbed one of the new hires by the Hawaiian shirt collar and said, “See here, if anything goes down in there tonight with those Surfer kooks we need to know whose side your on.”

The new hire, as it happened, had many friends in the Surfer camp. He had grown up with some of them in Orange County and had worked with some of them also. But there ain’t no atheists in foxholes and there certainly ain’t no brotherly love in a blood feud so The Inertia lieutenant had to know who he could count on in there if things went pear shaped.

The new hire looked at him, laughed, and said, “No.”

Thankfully nothing did go pear shaped. The Inertia staff stayed in tight formation and so did the Surfer staff, eyeing each other but no limp-wristed slaps were dished.

Just think, though, if there had been a rumble at Turtle Bay! Just picture the look on Hawaiian faces if the staffs of Surfer and The Inertia had exploded into a full physical altercation!

It would have been the greatest day in surf history. Well, there’s always next year.

 

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Chazz Michael Michaels
Chazz Michael Michaels
10 years ago

Some mildly humourous imagery, but the biggest non-blood feud story ever.

Brutus
Brutus
10 years ago

what’s Inertia? any relation to the Law?

Wiggolly's Paddling Style
Wiggolly's Paddling Style
10 years ago

BLOOD FEUD: BEACHGRIT VS STABMAG! Morgan Williamson gets schooled on how to pay homage (horribly) to the works of the late Hunter S. Thompson in a surf magazine. Hemingway and Bukowski will be fucking spewing they missed this tutorial!

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
10 years ago

Chas has really come back swinging from that whole ethics shit, thank God!

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
10 years ago

Z-Dubs shoulda joined the family business: http://www.easternvirginiad…

blumpkin mung
blumpkin mung
10 years ago

This is amazing. I once blatantly burned Inertiaberg on a fairly decent day at the local and he nearly cried while trying to put together some overly wordy argument about his integral part in the patchwork of the surfing community that his internship at Surfer had afforded him. He was promptly burned again.

srfmstr
srfmstr
10 years ago

I hate the Inertia. There is no comparison. Although Surfer lost its elan when Severson left, its legacy alone makes it way way cooler. I can see why they dumped that Weisberg kook.

bitter guy
bitter guy
10 years ago

so the new hire got his walking papers for not being down for the cause? this is the gayest blood feud i’ve heard of, fucking Surfers Journal sounds gangster by comparison.

Audit In Progress
Audit In Progress
10 years ago

So many Blood Feuds! It’s like candy! This one might be my favorite.

Jimmy the Saint
Jimmy the Saint
10 years ago

Kip would kick Napoleon’s ass, he didn’t waste his time in that dojo…. Kip is Surfer I’d say https://www.youtube.com/wat…

Chas Smith
Chas Smith
10 years ago

I totally agree on the Kip is Surfer, Nap is The Inertia dichotomy.

dickie toledo
dickie toledo
10 years ago

page six of surfing news


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