World champ ain't real thrilled about coming second last to average surfer…
Let’s be real honest. Glenn Hall, an engaging falsetto from Australia’s Central Coast (forget that dubious Irish ancestry that got him into the world amateurs years ago), ain’t the kinda surfer you’d spend money on a webcast to see. (It’s coming!)
And, yet, here, at Snapper Rocks, in miserable little waves the WSL has waited 10 days to surf, and were forced to surf because of the unwieldy nature of having concurrent men’s and women’s events with a total of 45 surfers, he just beat the reigning world champion, the 21-year-old Brazilian Gabriel Medina. By an interference.
The interference was plain enough. Micro had priority. Gabriel pushed it too far; Micro milked it and got it through. Y’could see Micro lighting up on Gabs but you could also sense he pulled his words, just a little, because as every surfer knows, you don’t smack talk a Brazilian, not when his countrymen are “passionate” and whom also enjoy practising a lethal form of jiujitsu.
In his post-heat interview, Micro, who looked like he’d been outfitted by a stylist from Back to the Future with his giant plastic watch and plastic sunglasses housing reflective blue lenses, was smart enough to talk up Gabriel.
“He’s a really good dude, passionate in the water and a legend out of the water.”
What was Gabriel saying to you? the interviewer asked.
“He was telling me to calm down…”
Soon, Gabriel appeared. He was very sad. He said, “You know, the waves are pretty bad. Ten days for waves like this? KP didn’t do a good job… I hope he can do better.”
Gabriel said he was confused by the rule that sunk him and then… unexpectedly… although perhaps it shouldn’t be unexpected given Gabriel’s sulky form, he said, “Next time Glen Hall say fuck you to me, I will teach him…”
Peter Mel, who has never panicked in his life, even at 20-foot Mavs, stole the air and sputtered:
“Uh… uh… uh… not a happy man…”
Ironically, it’s the best thing to happen in this contest. Will the WSL recognise it as such?
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GABS: NEXT TIME MICRO SAYS FUCK OFF I WILL TEACH HIM HOW TO SAY BAD WORDS IN BRAZILIAN! I don’t care for Medina but don’t trade journalism for page clicks.
I spent $10 betting on this event and Fanning is now my only hope of getting any money back.
if that would of been adriano failing to stand up on a 1ft wave and parko getting the interference, all of oz would of fallen off the map. micro sure looked like his sole intention was to draw an interference, rather than surf the wave.
NEwSBREAK. which country, what group of live video watchers, surfers, kids, parents, or general public, in exactly what part of the the world, has not heard, and or is offended by, a mundane mention of the word fuck.??
as mr hynd says, “the most conservative sport in the world“….
.
great article great insight as always.
silly stuff. watch the heat. decide who surfed better. maybe that person should win? soccer tactics by a barely above average surfer. no contact, no wave to be ridden, and gabs clearly says ,next time ill teach him some bad words in portuguese. thats a threat? this is th best we got from the comp? jeez. oh and nice new grey yellow circle thing that keep popping up on screen….
Is this THE David Carson?
To be honest if a jockey looking helium voiced dude told me to fuck off I’d be a bit fired up as well.
Or you could; ignore it, look at your world title trophy, bang any Brazilian chick you wanted, feel happy, and not give a fuck about Glen because he won’t be back on tour next year……….. But, lets face it, It’s way more fun to start shit on a live webcast.
Woah there. He’s a Christian. The good lord states that thou shalt not bang ye chicks until thou is married. Fact.
Were I ever to find myself in that situation, I’d probably rip out a smart phone and ask him to say it again so I could film it.
Gabby + Noa star in the next Neville film! We all win! WSL is fucked!
Maybe one day once all of the major sponsorship $$$ is gone, the powers at be will realize what their target market truly desires… This shit.
Highlight. I was hoping it continued into a BOBBY MARTINEZ ALL CAPS THROWDOWN THOUGH!
I’m hoping this episode results in a new nickname for Micro. How about Fighting Irishmen or something useful?
“And Surfline can go fuck itself.” ha! Perfect.
Glenn may not a Fashionista like yourself yourself Derek, but he just beat the champ. I hope to see you out box soon in your Uber cool 1995 Rip Curl Steamer.
…even worse, tiny BeachGrit branded surf trunks. But free shipping! Even to Umina!
crazy, same results on this – http://www.worldsurfleague….