You’ve already seen this gem on StabStitch and
Surfing-Er and, if you are 43 and drive a Toyota Corolla
and dream of moving out of mother’s house, The Inertia.
But it is worth seeing it here because I love Damien Hobgood.
Damien Hobgood is possibly the greatest man on earth and tied as
my favorite surfer with CJ Hobgood. I saw him at Souplantation just
the other day because my 2¼ year old daughter thinks it is heaven
even though it is, quite possibly hell.
Souplantation, if you don’t know, is a buffet of salad and soup
and pretend pizza. My 2¼ year old daughter loves the peas and the
noodles from the chicken soup. I like none of it. But I take her at
least twice a week because she is souper cute. And just the other
day I walked in and there was Damo and his three children and his
wife. He and his wife looked very tired but they were such grand
parents to the children and we all laughed about many things and
they made me happy to be at Souplantation.
The moral of this story is kids make you tired, don’t go to
Souplantation if you can help it, but if you do go pray that Damien
and family are there. And get barreled.
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SurfStitch Buys Stab and Magic Seaweed for
$20 mill!
By Derek Rielly
In a split of $13.8 million in cash and 4.8 million
shares…
Ain’t biz just a lottery? One minute you’re on
the bones of your ass, sitting at the back of planes, driving
sputtering Japanese cars, the next you’re kicking down the door of
a new beachfront mansion, multiples of teens plucking at your
strange fruit.
Just, like, then, the online surf store SurfStitch
bought Stab, a little print mag and online portal your ol
pal DR started in 2004 and sold six years later (Duh!), and
Magic Seaweed, the second-biggest surf site in the
world after Surfline, in a deal worth $13.98
million cash and 4.8 million SurfStitch shares.
According to the Australian Financial Review,
“SurfStitch chief executive and co-founder Justin
Cameron is hopeful that in addition to reducing the
company’s reliance on external marketing channels, the two
acquisitions will deliver revenue synergies as content on both
sites will drive sales to SurfStitch and
promote repeat visitation across all platforms.
“SurfStitch’s demonstrated global leadership in action
sports and youth culture apparel is greatly enhanced with the
addition of Magicseaweed and Stab Magazine,” he
said.
“These highly complementary acquisitions represent the voice of
SurfStitch‘s core audience, connecting us with our
customers and providing us greater insight into their preferences,
influences and purchasing behaviour.”
“Mr Cameron added that SurfStitch’s mission is to
become the global destination for action sports and youth lifestyle
content and online retail.
“Combined with our recent launch of ‘The Lens’, the acquisitions
will further SurfStitch‘s global content driven strategy
to provide relevant and engaging content to our growing active
customer base,” he said.
“A fully-underwritten institutional placement of 25 million
shares – representing 11.7 per cent of issued capital
and priced at $1.50 per share – will raise the needed $37.5
million cash to pay for Stab and Magicseaweed.
This represents a 3.2 per cent discount to
SurfStich last close of $1.55 per share.”
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Afro-Studs Rule Day One at Brazil Pro!
By Derek Rielly
Gabriel, Filipe (natch), Italo, Wiggoly, Adriano
and Jadson cuckold world tour!
Rio de Janeiro is a famous place. A bay of the
sea, almost a perfect semi-circle. A megalopolis of six-million
people. A city in a country built on the back of slaving so
energetic it makes the US’s own past look quaintly dull.
Hot, too, mostly, but not today, not when the temperature
hovered at 71 degrees all day, all night. A place of stimulus and
excitement. Where inquisitive mouths will kiss every inch of your
body if only you allow yourself the physical freedom Brazil
demands. The body in Brazil is tropical! Fire! The blood is hot,
the body luscious to the kiss.
It’s the country where male tourists, sometimes attached pro
surfers, are invariably cuckolded by the splendid physical
specimens prancing along the beach in gaily coloured trunks that
make even BeachGrit swoon with jealous.
And therefore, what a fitting place for Brazil’s afro-studs to
assert the heroic underdog narrative. The Brazilian can’t afford to
put things off. He must stop the whole show… NOW… and grasp the
reins of this historic opportunity.
Let’s investigate the non-surprising results from yesterday’s
opening gambit, Oi Rio Pro, event number four in the Men’s Samsung
Galaxy Championship Tour.
Wiggoly Dantas beat John John,
Gabriel beat Freddy P, Italo beat
Mick Fanning, Adriano beat Kai Otton,
Jadson beat Josh Kerr and Dusty Payne,
Filipe beat Kolohe and Melling.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lF57960UyYI
And Kelly Slater? For the first real time this year he kicked
his motor over and was aroused to heat. Two high nines while Ace
Buchan and Ricardo Christie waited til he’d finished before
gobbling up his cream pie.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBIMs7R-vMo
Oi Rio Men’s Pro Round 1 Results:Heat
1: Jeremy Flores (FRA) 12.17, Brett Simpson (USA) 12.07,
Taj Burrow (AUS) 6.30Heat 2: Kelly Slater (USA)
19.27, Adrian Buchan (AUS) 12.06, Ricardo Christie (NZL) 11.76
Heat 3: Wiggolly Dantas (BRA) 15.97, John John
Florence (HAW) 10.66, C.J. Hobgood (USA) 9.94
Heat 4: Gabriel Medina (BRA) 12.33, Freddy
Patacchia Jr. (HAW) 7.77, Alejo Muniz (BRA) 4.90
Heat 8: Sebastian Zietz (HAW) 12.06, Jordy
Smith (ZAF) 10.67, Keanu Asing (HAW) 10.60
Heat 9: Bede Durbidge (AUS) 14.84, Glenn Hall
(IRL) 11.94, Nat Young (USA) 6.17
Heat 10: Filipe Toledo (BRA) 16.27, Kolohe
Andino (USA) 11.93, Adam Melling (AUS) 8.40
Heat 11: Matt Banting (AUS) 9.76, Miguel Pupo
(BRA) 9.26, Julian Wilson (AUS) 9.10
Heat 12: Matt Wilkinson (AUS) 14.96, Joel
Parkinson (AUS) 13.47, Owen Wright (AUS) 10.34
Oi Rio Men’s Pro Round 2 Match-Ups:
Heat 1: Mick Fanning (AUS) vs. David do Carmo
(BRA)
Heat 2: John John Florence (HAW) vs. Alex
Ribeiro (BRA)
Heat 3: Taj Burrow (AUS) vs. Alejo Muniz
(BRA)
Heat 4: Josh Kerr (AUS) vs. C.J. Hobgood
(USA)
Heat 5: Jordy Smith (ZAF) vs. Ricardo Christie
(NZL)
Heat 6: Nat Young (USA) vs. Brett Simpson
(USA)
Heat 7: Julian Wilson (AUS) vs. Dusty Payne
(HAW)
Heat 8: Joel Parkinson (AUS) vs. Keanu Asing
(HAW)
Heat 9: Owen Wright (AUS) vs. Glenn Hall
(IRL)
Heat 10: Miguel Pupo (BRA) vs. Adam Melling
(AUS)
Heat 11: Kolohe Andino (USA) vs. Kai Otton
(AUS)
Heat 12: Adrian Buchan (AUS) vs. Fredrick
Patacchia (HAW)
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Why You Should Watch “Brother” The
Movie
By Derek Rielly
An interview with its co-creator, What Youth's
Travis Ferré…
…well, yeah, I get it. Kolohe ain’t the
hotter-than-everything Filipe Toledo. Yeah, I get he’s a child
prodigy destined for great-ish things his entire life and so he
isn’t an entirely sympathetic character in the surf culture
narrative. An Instagram account that would seem ironic if it
wasn’t, doesn’t help either.
But then there’s plenty that makes me like Brother. The
cuckolding, attempted or otherwise, of a chubby little TV hotshot
with a mouth invented for devouring hot fudge sundaes, for example.
Didn’t you roar your approval when the pudgy Cinderella barked at
Brother during a live-cross interview?
This June, Brother is going to be available as a
free download on What Youth. Should you evaporate your
bandwidth on the movie Kai Neville describes as a “short, fast ampy
shred flick”?
Let’s ask Travis Ferré , the co-founder of What Youth,
whose mid-surf conversations resulted in the collaboration tween
his mag and the current world number 26…
BeachGrit: Can you describe the film to
moviegoers?
Travis: It’s quite simple. Kolohe surfing with his friends,
spliced together with some really good music, all over the world.
It’s not a bio pic by any means. More of a snapshot of his year.
But I’d say the unique thing is watching Kolohe surfing in long
form, which is really impressive. There are some really wild banger
clips, but it’s Kolohe’s style and form that shines to me.
BeachGrit: How long is this film, how many sections, and
where was it filmed?
Travis: It’s about 25 minutes long, there are six full sections
and a few other little interludes, and it was filmed in California,
Europe, Western Australia, Hawaii and Indo. Pretty classic
choices.
BeachGrit: What was the purpose of
Brother?
Travis Kolohe has had a filmer (Noah Alani) traveling with him
for most of his life, and he’s had a few projects not come to
fruition, so we simplified the concept: Kolohe shredding with his
friends. And we really wanted to make sure the friend aspect came
across as he spends so much time surfing with them, but it rarely
gets shown to the world. Kolohe wanted to put something out that
was more impactful than a greatest hits web clip too, so we worked
closely with him and I think he hit the nail on the head with what
he was after.
BeachGrit: Where does it fit on the cultural ladder?
Travis: Well, it’s more of a snapshot than a profile film or
anything, but I think in the grand scheme of things at the moment,
with very little in between the mega blockbuster helicopter freak
show films, and the over saturated web clip and the few instances
to see Kolohe surf loose and full of smiles with his friends. This
is what I’d say is the perfectly balanced film for the modern
condition. And Kolohe’s surfing is really pleasing to the eye.
BeachGrit: How can we buy, see?
Travis: Brother will stream for 24 hours at What Youth on May
26th, and then it will be available on Red Bull TV on Demand May
27th for a week, and then June 2nd it will available for free
download.
BeachGrit: What do you love about
Brother?
Travis: Well, if we’re talking about the man, I love his hair.
And if it’s the movie, I love that I can rematch it and rematch it.
I haven’t rewatched a surf film more than this one since the old
Taylor Steele vids.
You should probably get involved too if you like
money and/or want more money.
Deciding to take my own advice, late Friday
night, I bought GoPro. I cracked into my piggy bank, opened a
Fidelity.com account, transferred money and then placed my order. 5
shares for $50.04 each. Fidelity.com warned me, with a red popup
screen, that this was a bad idea. The markets were, of course,
closed for the weekend and who knows what weirdness Nicholas “Nick”
Woodman could get up to between Saturday and Sunday and who knows
how his self-described “mad” behavior would crash the stock
price.
But I am as bold as I am handsome and overrode my digital
broker’s concern and placed it anyway. “What kind of investor
should I be?” I wondered whilst sipping a Moscow Mule. “Should I be
quiet and let my money do the talking or should I model myself off
famed activist shareholder T. Boone Pickens and bark orders up the
chain?”
By the time Monday’s opening bell clanged, I was decided. I
would be like T. Boone Pickens and make very many demands. I know
people who work at GoPro, you see, and some are as smart as they
are beautiful but most are dull. They need me to guide them into a
financially rich future. Especially since my position, three hours
in to the trading day, is already down 5.57%.
The first order of business, then, Nick Woodman is to fire
everyone who works out of your San Mateo office. I have never met
anyone from the Bay Area who knew a damned thing about style and we
are in the style biz. It’s how we are going to crush China. So that
also means no more overly washed True Religion jeans for you
either. Or way accessorized “action sports” kits.
Yes it’s time to buckle up and make some real money. By the time
I’m done you will officially be able to change your business cards
from “Mad Billionaire” to “Mad Millionaire.” The “Touched
Trillionaire.” Alliteration has a ring.
P.S. I also own Quiksilver. 40 shares at $1.62 each. As is, for
now, boys. The suit wetsuit is a work of art.
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Jon Pyzel and Matt Biolos by
@theneedforshutterspeed/Step Bros