Amazing and pensive all slow-motion film to promote Villager Goods…
One month ago, Chas Smith revealed the nature of Taj Burrow, Jack Freestone, Koa Smith and pals’ new brand, Villager Goods.
Beer? No. Coconut water, yes!
Chas wrote: “Remember St. Archer? The extreme sport craft beer financed by action sport stars that took the world by storm, eventually selling to MillerCoors for multiple tens of millions of dollars?
“I remember when I first heard the concept that I almost spit vodka out my nose. “Another craft beer in San Diego?” I chortled. “Ha!” The market here, for those who don’t know, is gagged with a bazillion tons of hops and barley and mostly hops since IPA is trending hard. And distribution is controlled by very few. How would a dang extreme sport craft beer even begin to compete. “HA!”
“Boy, was I wrong.
“And now the same team is entering another choked market. Coconut water! That’s right, you’ve seen Laura Enever’s post, the word VILLAGER in black on a simple white background. You’ve maybe even followed @villagergoods and seen that same logo tiled across the page.
“But what is?
“Extreme sport Coconut water as financed by action sport stars! I’m sure there is some sort of ecological/giving-back angle. I’m sure it will have electrolytes. I’m sure it will taste good and be branded well. I’m sure they will steal market share and be scooped up.
“Investors include Jack Freestone and Taj Burrow, Taylor Knox, Pat, Dane and Tanner Gudauskas, Laura Enever, and best skateboarder in the world Paul Rodriguez.”
A few moments ago, the gang dropped their first promo film. It features skateboarding, long boarding, a man with a Hasselblad and a Fugazi hat (credibility overload!), a little of JF’s small-wave sorcery, a fine long shot of Laura’s ass, a close-up of Koa’s plum-like tits (double sexism!) and much RED-captured slow-mo.
(Thanks to Ned Sweet for the link…)
Thanks for the amazing content! It is really inspiring to see that you can cut and paste, Derek! Such skill! Maybe you can write a tutorial…
…guilty as charged, guilty as hell. But let me add something. It was two-thirts. I’d spent an hour writing a piece about coconut waters, St Archer, everything. Wrote it straight into the browser which is always a dumb idea. Hit publish. Page error. Story lost. Had to pick up a kid from school. Threw that cut and paste thing together in 90 seconds. Figured, the video was kinda interesting and a re-run of Chas’ words ain’t always a bad thing. Just about to cut and paste another story straight from the Daily Mail! It’s precious!
It’s your website! I’m just messing with y’all, all in fun… though, really, when are you going to post that tutorial?
…which tutorial? Oh! Takes a goddamn while to master but try this: Command A, Command C, Command V. Think: All, Cut, Victory! I can post complete story, as previously mentioned, in ninety seconds!
Thanks! The Command A is a little tricky, but I think, with practice, I’ll eventually get the hang of it.
If anyone’s actually gonna get paid, they’re gonna have to sell a lot of coconut water with that many pros involved…
“Hey, you’re approaching retirement, you wanna start a business with 35 other aging athletes whose images are waning?”
How is Kelly not involved?
let’s all drink it from our shoes! then squirt lime in our eyes!
I would love to go back 16 years to his Piss Drunx days and tell Andrew Reynolds that he will, in time, be investing in coconut water.
is the aim to make you puke in your mouth and then buy the coconut water to get rid of the taste? because if that is the aim then the advertisement is perfect!
Oh that was horrible!
Don’t get me wrong, I love me some coconut water (works wonders on hangovers). That said, I smell a heaping pile of overpriced bullshit coming.
The name makes me think of inbreeding.
Taj on the left, Freestone on the right?
Sometimes (quite regularly) when I have a hangover, where nothing is enjoyable and a dense black cloud of dread follows my head (that feels like it’s cracked) and my heart (that feels paper thin and about to rupture) around the city as I try in vain to walk it off, my mouth is filled with a disgusting thirst only amplified by water. Here I drink coconut water.
Is that you Morgan? You know if you drink another beer you’re not hungover anymore. Case closed.
Hasslblad/Fugazi guy is the illustrious and wonderful photographer Atiba Jefferson, a man not lacking in credibility!
Or was it Ako? Who the fuck knows!
Fair point!
I thought Fugazi didn’t produce any merchandise…
They didn’t. Bootlegs only.
Distill this junk to eighty proof and I’m in.
The link is broken 🙁