Tyler Wright
What's the secret to Tyler's magic rhythm? | Photo: WSL

Parker: “Tyler Wright is Pure Surf Porn!”

Those turns! How can a man not fall in love?

Margs is almost over! Just a couple more days, a few more heats, and we can move on to the magic! Rio! Who will win? Who will lose? Who will contract Hep C? Only time will tell.

Pretty damn stoked the Tyler Wright took the women’s win. Gotta be my favorite female surfer. Finally surpassed Coco, though it’s a close thing. So much power behind those turns. Little bit of a crush going on. I have a thing for athletic women. The finely tuned female form does wonders for me. Way better than the waif deal.

It’s about time someone drops another all ladies surf vid. And I mean pure surf porn. Can the cutesy bikini poses, cut the soulful stares into the distance. Just surf. That’s it.

Or drop the best on a boat trip somewhere, do some unvarnished coverage. Get an all female crew, lady filmers, leave the guys on shore. If there’s one thing I’ve learned in my thirty five years on earth, when it’s a same sex trip girls are just as foul and funny as boys.

I am a man, so I could be wrong, but there’s gotta be a demand. So many little girls learning these days, finally moving towards equality in the lineup. Not too long ago women weren’t supposed to surf. A stupidly sexist attitude that shouldn’t have existed in my lifetime, but did. Definitely part of the reason their performance angle suffered as long as it did. Shallow talent pool, less to draw from.

The lack of females in background roles is a problem too. So many stories I’d love to write but can’t. No matter how hard I try the male angle creeps in. Not really fair to tackle issues I don’t understand on any real level. Couldn’t, no matter how hard I try. The dick and chest hair and socialization run too strong.

Cori Schumacher’s a voice I miss. Outspoken, intelligent, amazing writer. Killer surfer too. But she’s moved on to bigger and better. Can’t blame her. In the larger scheme surf is totally unimportant.

But it’d be great if she passed the torch, or someone just picked it up. I’d kill to see stories written by women that didn’t include health or yoga or beauty tips.

Am I missing someone? Could be, it’s a big world, I don’t know everything in it.

Watch Tyler Wright win Margaret River here.

Courtney Conlogue vs. Tyler Wright - Drug Aware Margaret River Pro Final

Drug Aware Margaret River Pro Women’s Final Results:

1 – Tyler Wright (AUS) 18.67
2 – Courtney Conlogue (USA) 14.70

Drug Aware Margaret River Pro Women’s Semifinal Results:
SF 1: Courtney Conlogue (USA) 17.44 def. Tatiana Weston-Webb (HAW) 12.17
SF 2: Tyler Wright (AUS) 15.07 def. Carissa Moore (HAW) 14.07

Drug Aware Margaret River Pro Women’s Quarterfinal Results:
QF 1: Tatiana Weston-Webb (HAW) 15.00 def. Sally Fitzgibbons (AUS) 7.20
QF 2: Courtney Conlogue (USA) 17.33 def. Laura Enever (AUS) 6.67
QF 3: Carissa Moore (HAW) 14.57 def. Bianca Buitendag (ZAF) 6.40
QF 4: Tyler Wright (AUS) 16.53 def. Stephanie Gilmore (AUS) 8.74

2016 Samsung Galaxy WSL Top 5 (After Drug Aware Margaret River Pro):
1. Courtney Conlogue (USA) 26,000 pts
2. Tyler Wright (AUS) 25,200 pts
3. Carissa Moore (HAW) 19,500 pts
4. Tatiana Weston-Webb (HAW) 18,200 pts
5. Stephanie Gilmore (AUS) 15,600

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