Water safety meeting.
Water safety meeting.

Help, Doc! I’ve got the rage!

A New Zealand psychologist seeks to discover cure for surf rage. Come be surprised by his (wrong) analysis!

Do you get surf raged? When you are out in the lineup and about to take off of a beaut but there is someone there, taking off too and in front of you but not looking back? Do you ride up behind him and scream…

…FUCK YOU!

In to his ear? And shoot your board at the back of his head? Or do you let it go because there is always another?

If you are the former then a New Zealand PhD is going to solve your problems! Let’s read about him?

An academic study into surf rage will likely find it’s motivated by water safety than bad blood, one of New Zealand’s top surfers says.

Raglan resident and former national champ Daniel Kereopa said fist fights weren’t a big problem here and most local surfers were  out to inform rather than fight.

“Seventy per cent of the surfers out there don’t really know how to surf that well and they’re actually putting themselves in danger. They surf waves beyond their ability or get themselves into bad positions,” he said.

“The locals are the ones who surf here most often so they understand the dangers, so what it boils down to in the end is water safety.

And do you agree that the cause of surf rage is likely water safety? I am no PhD but think that the cause is that surfers are buttheads. And selfishness. And too many people too few waves. Etc.

0 0 votes
Article Rating
Subscribe
Notify of
guest
29 Comments
Newest
Oldest Most Voted
Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

I jest, I jest, and I only jest.

omlete
omlete
9 years ago

I was up in Indo last year and there was a Kiws guy there who shall be nameless. He was doing turtle research for his Masters Degree at Otago. it seemed to involve a huge amount of surfing, and very little time doing anything turtle related.

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

I’ll have you know that surf tourism saved the Balinese from extinction.

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

It’s a more honest scam than, say, saving souls through surfing.

Bleach'd Git
Bleach'd Git
9 years ago

Another delightful caption. That sort of attention to detail will get you noticed by powerful readers/Speakers.

omlete
omlete
9 years ago

Sort of, Daniel Kereopa isn’t the PhD guy, he was just asked to comment – wrongly as it turned out. But something else the article said was that the research dude was going to test whether learning about Maori carving and culture would help cure surf rage. This is an excellent idea, Maoris being renowned for their peacefulness.

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  omlete

I’m told that the revised project suggests “learning about Maori carving and culture after joining the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.”

omlete
omlete
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

Have you ever been to a Christian Surfers event? It always pumps. So maybe not such a bad idea.

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  omlete

Dude: “I surf for Jesus. It’s like being sponsored.”

[Skulls a beer, puts arm around chick’s waist]

Dude: “Did you know that Genesis 2:25 states that “man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed…”

Chick [cites John 15:7-8]: “If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.”

[Dude takes chick back to his ute, Luke 2:16 “and they went with haste”]

[Chick emerges from Ute only to enact Samuel 1:10]: “She was deeply distressed and prayed to the Lord and wept bitterly.”

omlete
omlete
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

I like that they have a ute. Every surfer should have one.

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  omlete

Absolutely.

haroldbethyname
haroldbethyname
9 years ago
Reply to  omlete
Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

More bogan, less Brooklyn!

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago

An academic study of surfing is almost as paradoxical as a surfing study of academia.

DrunkenAngel
DrunkenAngel
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

i like the latter

ricmatic
ricmatic
9 years ago

It’s really kind of heroic… Thank You for saving us (from lowering your wave count)!

Karl Von Fanningstadt
Karl Von Fanningstadt
9 years ago

Since I would want the person who cut me off to drown, be maimed by a rabid seal, or get decapitated by the lip or my surfboard, I would say my surf rage has absolutely nothing to do with concerns over water safety. That’s just a guess, though…

huuor
huuor
9 years ago
Chas Smith
Chas Smith
9 years ago
Reply to  huuor

Oh I think I’m going to get this….

Otto
Otto
9 years ago

Seems like this PhD is opening a Pandora’s box. There’s a lot of different rages out there these days. Perhaps its always about safety. Or, that’s what they’ll start telling the judge.

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  Otto

The shit you can get a PhD for in NZ and Australia is pretty ridiculous.

Anyone want to propose a doctoral project studying the effects of mental retardation in WSL leadership? I think Waikato or Otago will have us.

The MHL Buoy
The MHL Buoy
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

Otago was so amazing that I don’t really remember my 4 years there.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
9 years ago
Reply to  The MHL Buoy

Burn any couches?

The MHL Buoy
The MHL Buoy
9 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

yes – many thanks for the drunken flashback!

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  The MHL Buoy

I wasn’t hating the player, just the game.

Tom
Tom
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

Just wait till Kelly gets his honorary PhD in something – will happen – prob from a NZ uni now for sure

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  Tom

Shit, after Bob Dylan got the Nobel Prize for literature, I’d imagine Kelly is already shortlisted for next year’s Nobes in econ for single-handedly keeping the WSL afloat.

DavidC
DavidC
9 years ago
Reply to  Mariano Landa

Slag Kelly but don’t slag Bob!

Mariano Landa
Mariano Landa
9 years ago
Reply to  DavidC

Yeah, cuz he’s the Petrarch of our times…


29
0
Would love your thoughts, please comment.x
()
x