Without a foil we will wither on the vine!
Yesterday’s story Rumour: TV Salesman to buy SurfStitch was as enjoyable as it was informative. In case you were too busy to see it featured a very rich, Australian man who thought the failing online surfwear retailer/Stab magazine publisher was worth a flip.
Before we go on, quickly, does it annoy you that when I write a rumor it is a “rumor” and when Derek writes a rumor it is a “rumour?” Should we settle on one and stay consistent or are these little nuances part of BeachGrit’s charm?
But let’s head back to the very rich Australian man. In the picture he looked… like a person who likes computers etc. Our Nik Karol wrote:
This is classic Revenge of the Nerds hey? I hope he fucking hates surfers and snaps up SurfStich so he can show those fuckwits the door. Double the shares from seven cents to 14 then flip it to the Chinese. Poetry.
And it made me chuckle but also wonder who, in today’s social stratification, is the surfer’s natural enemy? I think we are all closer to nerds these days, see Kenny Powers, and don’t think they are necessarily our enemy. But who? It is important to have, I think, for our shared sense of self worth.
So is our enemy:
a) the po po
b) jocks
c) dweebs
d) poor people
e) greasers
f) inner city youth
g) anitfa
h) posers
i) poseurs
j) education
k) other
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The interweb – floaters used to feel good.
Actually they’re SUC/Kers on SUC/K’s
(Stand Up Canoers/Kayakers)
Thank you for the compliment.
Death really frees up head-space from all that worry about one’s mortality.
Rumour mate
Mental health
I hate myself more than anything on that list
Evolutionarily speaking, it would make more sense for me to progress to That Dead Hippopotamus at Trestles. Bears are basically decendents of loner seals that walked away from the seal rookery because they hated being social creatures. Hence why bears are such grumpy loner sorts. Now cetaceans, we love being social. Fucking hell, took us generations to learn that whalers didn’t want to hang out and be buddies. We’re related more to hippos. Fat fucks that love hanging out with other fat fucks in water. That bear got his card pulled cause he thought he could unnaturally progress to a seal. He had to go. Keep natural order. I got a good laugh from some bear loving loner fuck thinking “I’ll show that Whaley guy and get that new name before him.”
WSL?
The WSL is like that one friend of yours you hate but can’t be enemies with cause you grew up across the street from one another.
And his sister is hot.
In this case, would be Rosie.
Republicans and the American Dream.
They’re just trying to make America grate again.
Same enemy it’s always been: work.
chaffing
jungle fungus
trump
ego
self reflection
Think of commas as your friend, not your enemy.
SUPs
Oh and Laird
Oooh and Joel!
I love ‘rumour’ and ‘colour’ and ‘favourite’.
Damn Seppo dumbing-down bullshit. (I also belong to the Seppo race but cringe at it frequently)
To be someone or something’s enemy, you must offer some sort of threat. Surfers have, what, a belief they are somehow superior to non surfers and an obsessive preoccupation with the weather?
regarding the rumour / rumor issue, please maintain diversity. I appreciate it. and I buy everything you advertise.
Wasting your id on 300 word posts, when you should be working on your screenplay of about an elite team of meth-fuelled North Shore heavies cum ex Navy Seals who storm Ridyah and get the king to withdraw soldiers from Yemen, whilst, at the same time, teaching his harem to surf, the resulting exuberance of which convinces him to let women drive a car without a man present.
Oh I’m busily scribbling Yemen right now and also turning Welcome to Paradise into a musical.
West Side Story meets Laramie Project.
…meets Hairspray.
North Side Story:
The most beautiful sound I ever heard: Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie . . .
All the beautiful sounds of the world in a single word . .
Eddie, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie . . . Eddie!
I’ve just met an enforcer named Eddie,
And suddenly I’ve got, the cred to shred at Pipe
No longer will they burn,
No longer will they turn me out of their parties!
I’ve just got a scoop with a man named Eddie, And suddenly I’ve found How wonderful a ground and pound,
Can be!
Particularly when its Mick and not meeeee!
Eddie!
Say it loud and teeth go flying,
Say it soft and it’s almost like crying.
Eddie, I’ll never stop saying Eddie!