Totally free! Tax and everything included!
It seems like the entire world can be broken into two camps these days. Those who read books and those who listen to books. I never really understood those who listen to books until I drove from north county San Diego all the way to Jackson, Wyoming and back over the holidays. I began with music but then transitioned to podcasts and then audio books. Music is great for a few hours but it becomes like wallpaper after a while. Podcasts are great for more hours but listening to a new subject every few hours can be slightly jarring. Audio books bring you in and allow you to luxuriate on the same topic for 8 to 15 hours.
Having someone reading to you, in your ear, is very intimate and soothing. Time just melts away and irritation at others’ poor driving etc. stops registering when you are in the very middle of a nice, lengthy story.
And did you know Cocaine + Surfing is also an audio book? It’s true! And Audible Audio book read by a famous reader named Tom Pile. The people at Audible didn’t ever ask me to read, when the book sold, and I assume it is because they heard my Muppet voice on the Grit! podcast. Maybe they heard it say, “I’m warning you Ashton…” and realized that it carried no weight.
Tom Pile’s voice carries much weight. It sounds like it has experienced many mafia sorts of things all noir and serious. I wish I could trade my voice for his. I probably would not have to try and choke people out anymore because my voice would signal how dangerous I am.
I can’t trade my voice, anyhow, but maybe it doesn’t even matter because you get to hear my thoughts through Tom Pile’s very tough baritone.
And guess what?
I have a free Audible version of Cocaine + Surfing to give away! Who wants? Simply tell the world which famous celebrity you would want to read the Audible version of your memoir in the comments below and I’ll chose one and gift you!
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Turtle
Lisa Anderson, Chas Smith and Oprah Winfrey collab.
Meat Loaf
CHARLIE SHEEN – TIGER BLOOD
when I first saw a picture of you, you looked like you had a british accent. So it is a tie between:
Anthony Hopkins
Arnold Schwarzenegger
And Paul Reubens (pee-wee herman)
Steve Buscemi
Sean Connery…..but when high on wHite lines…Gilbert Godfrey!
Stu Kennedy
The audible version is hilarious! I don’t think anyone checked it. The narrator obviously doesn’t surf. It’s crazy how he pronounces, OP, poke, da kine, etc…
Just so you know in the most remote shark infested western civilisation in the world I received an email today saying that amazon is now shipping my copy I so diligently preordered with with the equally remote expectation of receiving a copy before PERTH airport, ho Hum..
makes sense now.
You think he played for it?
I want Ron Jeremy to read my memoirs while on cocaine
I dunno about my my memoir, but if I wanted to pretend I had JJF narrating something I’d use this guy.
Listen to it without watching it, he sounds exactly the same!
http://channel.nationalgeog…
Dame Edna
Chas,
Prince Phillip at 97 shares my birthday could read my memoir – be pretty short and he swears a lot so prob be perfect. Aw fuck he’s not really a celeb, but a grumpy old cunt apparently, but just has same birthday as me!!
Eddie Murphy
Tony Montana
owen wright
I’d go for Joe Turpel, and market it as a Soporific
Kevin Spacey. The character and voice of Lester from American Beauty. The recent allegations etc about him just make less ordinary… “I don’t think that there is anything worse than being ordinary.”