It's easy to master and a hell of a lot of fun!
We’ve all been caught up in Surf Ranch and BSR Waco and etc. fretting over how the creation of genetically modified waves, wondering how these genetically modified waves will poison or benefit our DNA. Losing sleep at night just wondering about how the future will look. How our children’s children will surf. How our children’s children’s children will surf. Etc.
But while we’re distracted by waves and their creation the intrepid reporters from international wealth magazine Forbes know that surfing requires effort, even surfing perfect artificial waves, and the march of technology always seeks to limit effort.
Have you not watched Wall-E?
And let us read now, together, from Forbes.
Surfing is without a doubt a very fun sport, but not only is it difficult to master, it’s pretty tiring, too. You can sometimes be paddling for what seems like forever before you’re ready to catch your next wave, and even then it might not be worth the effort.
So, what are the alternatives out there? Well, I got the chance to try out a brand new innovation that looks to catch the eye of those that either already love surfing and fancy a change, or can’t quite master it and want the thrill without the effort.
That innovation is the Lampuga Boost, and it’s essentially the birth child of a surfboard and a jet ski, or in other words, an electric surfboard.
I can hands down say it’s one of the most exhilarating things I’ve ever done out at sea and by far the best watersport that I’ve ever tried. Why? Well, from the video below you’ll see it doesn’t look like I’m going that fast, right? But in reality, when your feet and stood precariously on a board in the ocean and you have the addition of the natural movement of the sea under you; 32mph feels a lot faster. As a result, it can sometimes feel like you’re holding on for dear life. This fear, though, is easily translated into excitement because you’re in control of how fast you’re going at all times thanks the board’s speed-variable trigger, which at the flick of a thumb, can slow things down a bit, or equally speed them up.
After a few attempts, I found myself using this control to my advantage, skillfully releasing it to slow down slightly when I wanted to carve into the sea and turn direction. It’s the little things like this that instantly make you feel like a pro. This was my second time on the board, and my fourth time ever surfing, and already I felt like I knew what I was doing. It’s easy to master and a hell of a lot of fun.
And there we are. The future. You children’s children’s children’s children’s other favorite thing to do besides drinking calories.
Isn’t “the thrill of surfing without the effort” the same as what wanking is to sex? Asking for a friend.
You could segway to the beach- bag of Carls Jr. in one hand and the electric surfboard in the other. Probably won’t even make it to the water with all the chicks surrounding you.
No foil? What a ripoff!
Beam me up, Scotty.
Were SUPs just not lame enough for everyone else?
Cue Red Bull short wherein professional other-than-surfer buzzes crowd at Teahupoo, dodges barrel, speaks earnestly about “the next level.”
Wow. I can’t wait to see the Euro-carnage at Pe’ahi (or name your break) I’m sure the locals will be delighted with the company. Because, you know, I’m sure they’re lonely.
Jamie O’Brien might already be board transferring the Wedge on one of these as we speak.
He could glue an inflatable swan to one, and charge Chopes.
This may sound like heresy, I used to like Job and what he was doing and still respect the fuck out of him for his Pipe act, but the whole “yuck, yuck, yuck lookatme see how much fun I’m having” thing – is just … well, I’m over it !
Ah yeah. He’s getting older and tired too. You could see it in his face in the minor footage of him on the beach during that last pipe event. I mean surfing will always be fun, but the whole jackass schtick will be wearing in his soul. He ain’t 26 anymore.
Plus, the whole media industry is essentially predicated on making viewers feel discomforted with their own life, and driven to consume shit; clothes, travel, etc. Look at the rise of young suicides, with all signs pointing to the impossible confections displayed on instagram etc: hot bodies, endless youthful leisure, lack of worries.
Jamie must know he is feeding that machine.
If only something like this was developed for cruising around golf courses….
TAKE EVERY HOLE.
so like, a stand-up jet ski, only harder and less comfortable? ugh, nope nope nope.
SUP on steroids, Jen.
They will leave their stupid little paddles behind and will now be set free.
Free to roam and deliver Lairds dream of surfing waves unridden.
Distant far breaking reefs and bombies as yet unconquered.
Unless o’course they don’t and menace the fuck out of every decent spot on earth.
What about instead of paddles, the SUPers use a strimmer (weed-whacker) with a propeller stuck on?
What could possibly go wrong?
har – check this out. Scroll down and check the vid.
Fukkn hell, potential for disaster is massive.
Nice titty jiggle half way thru, tho
https://newatlas.com/lampug…
Fuck, how depressing.
Two things: the noise echoing up to that little town…which is probably entirely composed of rich lizards (and their sweating servants) instead of normal working humans.
I’d like to see the rich jousting on them, with sharpened scimitars. The sharks circling and awaiting a victory.
The rich wouldn’t joust each other though – they’d need a poor to play the most dangerous game with. Or better yet, two poors to watch battle each other.
It’s over. There is no future.
What a pussy.
Your 2022 World Champ!
With the help of the Cosa Nostra in Palermo he can’t fail ? Sophie we are goin’ to make you an offer you can’t refuse . ( or was that Facebook ) ?
One of the Four Horsemen has revealed himself. I wouldn’t be surprised if this craft is the base technology for Facebook’s Occulus VR Pro Surfer Program. Facebook will buy it, weaponize it and do fun nerd stuff.