Disgraced WSL: Equal pay for equal work!

Worldwide outrage grows!

It is time, friends, to break out the pitchforks and begin our march to a town that is very near Venice, California. Oh, I am not speaking of Gardena or Hawthorne, the respective homes of twin incel + surf lifestyle blogs Stab and The Inertia. No. I’m speaking of Santa Monica and the official headquarters of the World Surf League.

Rage is swelling globably over the very clearly sexist snafu that occurred earlier this week in South Africa. You recall? That a man and a woman both won a surf competition and the World Surf League decided it was a good idea to take their picture with the man holding his winnings of 8000 rand and the woman holding her winnings of 4000 rand?

Criticism was swift with your own humble surf journalist declaring that the WSL’s equal pay schtick was a corrupt lie based upon a silly algorithm and that they should all burn in the hottest fires of hell but only after I write a Pulitzer prize winning expose in the vein of Rogers and Hammerstein.

A more important journalist, The Sydney Morning Herald’s Clementine Ford, declared very much more eloquently:

The impact of sexism on women’s careers is about so much more than legislation and formalised pay grades. By repeatedly sending the message that certain pursuits are masculine and that women trying to involve themselves are just obnoxious interlopers, society enables the continued disadvantage of those not privileged by gender. It’s not good enough for large corporations such as Billabong to need the public to point out these obvious inequalities, nor does it reflect well on the general make-up of those institutions that discrimination like this is seen as so standard that literally no-one thinks to challenge it.

And a group in South Africa has taken it upon themselves to right the World Surf League’s horribly sexist wrong. Let us learn about the WLS.

The Women Love Sport (WLS) campaign is a collaborative movement of ordinary people seeking to respond to the incident in which a young teenage girl won half the prize money of her male counterpart in a surfing competition in South Africa.

The question is: Can public outcry lead to positive change?

We think it can.

Let’s do more than just criticize, and show the world that women, and men, are willing to show up for women in sport.

This Women Love Sport (WLS) campaign specifically aims to contribute funds to women’s surfing in South Africa.

If you stand with us please make a donation to this movement.

We will ensure that the money is used in one of or all of the following ways:

1. Make a donation towards the female winners at the Ballito Pro 2018.

2. Make a fund available to supplement women’s contest winnings in other local surfing contests.

3. Make a donation to SurfingSA to further their existing work in women’s surfing development.

This is a community initiative showing SUPPORT for all existing investment in women’s surfing – from sponsors to event organisers – and is an act of solidarity with female athletes who battle to voice their frustrations in their competitive fields.

Please note: We pledge to make all financial contributions and dissemination of funds available to public.

I support fully, especially the public outcry part, and think we should still march to Santa Monica. Will you join?

Donate here!

Champions ride DHD!

Get rich: Invest in DHD Surfboards via equity crowdfunding!

Warning: "You may lose your entire investment, and you should be in a position to bear this risk without undue hardship."

Are you good at picking winners in the stock market, Fantasy Surfer and so on? I’m fabulously terrible. Loss after loss after loss.

I would’ve had far more fun pulverising hundreds of thousands of dollars with a rock or drinking expensive martinis made with ancient gin and eating stale salted peanuts in some famous hotel bar.

Recently, the phenomenally successful surfboard company Darren Handley Designs launched a crowdfunding campaign via the website Equitise.

If you didn’t know, Stephanie Gilmore, Mick Fanning and Matt Wilkinson all ride DHDs. Do they work? Does a Pope shit in the woods?

Wanna hang on my shoulder and read the prospectus?

In the last four years, the company has achieved considerable growth and attracted talented management that are focused on brand positioning and amplifying distribution channels. International sales represent 35% of revenue and with the introduction of EPS surfboards, DHD is well placed to increase this share. The company has also acquired the iconic Modom brand. As an established and innovative brand with existing offshore production relationships, work practices and product ranges, Modom is the key to expanding the product range of DHD and tapping into the surf accessory industry. Modom also has a loyal customer base and its own impressive riders Craig Anderson and Taj Burrow.

DHD is raising capital to increase inventory, invest in product innovation and marketing. Alongside and in addition to these plans, the company also has major growth opportunities in the EPS and soft surfboard market as well as accessories and fashion.

If you’re new to the speculative game or don’t have much cash to throw around, Equitise will relieve you of up to ten thousand Australian dollars.

If you’re a sophisticated investor (click here to see if you qualify) oowee… ain’t no limit to how much you can toss into the pot.

Are you in?


Before you invest your lifesavings, please be aware that,

  • Crowd-sourced funding is risky. Issuers using this facility include new or rapidly growing ventures. Investment in these types of ventures is speculative and carries high risks.
  • You may lose your entire investment, and you should be in a position to bear this risk without undue hardship.
  • Even if the company is successful, the value of your investment and any return on the investment could be reduced if the company issues more shares.
  • Your investment is unlikely to be liquid. This means you are unlikely to be able to sell your shares quickly or at all if you need the money or decide that this investment is not right for you.
  • Even though you have remedies for misleading statements in the offer document or misconduct by the company, you may have difficulty recovering your money.
  • There are rules for handling your money. However, if your money is handled inappropriately or the person operating this platform on which this offer is published becomes insolvent, you may have difficulty recovering your money.

Still excited?

Click here to invest. 


Buy: Craig Anderson’s prized HS surfboards!

Five hundred dollars apiece! Plus free Japanese beer…

If you’re kicking around Sydney’s northside and you’ve got a few c-notes in your billfold, I can’t think of a better way to liberate that cash than with the purchase of one of Craig Anderson’s old-ish surfboards.

Craig, you might remember, was the star of Slow Dance and Cluster, the participant in one of the great moments in surf history, helped popularise one of the most significant board designs in recent history, quit Quiksilver despite being offered a million bucks a year and the company’s blessing to start his own label, and a couple of years back did start his own label, called Former, with Dane Reynolds and a skateboarding man.

Several Februarys ago, I watched as a Jew supplicated himself before Craig at the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem; the day before at the Jaffa Gate, American girls had swooned as Craig roared past on a Segway, your reporter in the hottest pursuit!

Craig, who turns thirty this year, is a surfer whose surfboards matter, I think. And if you go to the Hayden Shapes headquarters, in Sydney’s Mona Vale, today and tomorrow, you can buy one and examine a few others.

Still left (a Holy Grail just sold for $A600), are three 5’7 1/2″ White Noiz’s, hand shaped by Hayden Cox, with Futures fin boxes (the best in the biz and the choice of champions from John John to Ando and so on), Former, Electric and Huff stickers and in a condition that ain’t pristine but ain’t beat-up either.

The price? Five hundred Australian dollars. Three-eight or so Americano.

Come and Hayden will even give you a Kirin beer for free!

Click here for more details. 

WSL*: “Confirmed: Women’s WCT trophy to be same as men’s!”

*World Sharkfeed League confuses and exhausts surf fans!

Do you like satire spooned onto your morning gruel? I do, and this is a bonanza.

Although it is unclear how long this one-day old Instagram account will exist given its use of the WSL logo and initials etc, we must enjoy while we can, especially since it’s driving surf fans nuts.

Twelve hours ago, the IG account @worldsurfleagues appeared. Shortly after, it had 4712 fans.

The first post went after the prizemoney thing. 

And the fans went bananas.

sophiemhickey@brianneworth !!! one small step towards equality…one very small step.
colgcThe size of the trophy? So thats equality? 🤔😂😂
harpy_harvey@colgc 🤯 don’t worry about equal prize money just give them the same trophy 🤣
neeskapetaWas the trophy the only thing of even footing? Prize money? Air time?
lukeweinertI thought size doesn’t matter #joking
chanymullinsYay, well done @wsl 🙂
lillypollardGood start WSL. Now prizemoney.
artesurfIt was half the trophy before? Thought it was just a diferent disign…

A post that announces “the acquisition of soul surfing” was met with similar confusion.

From rabid, but stupid, surf fans.

mdennu98Money money money. That’s what it’s all about ey
therealferbersacYou must be kidding right surfing is not about money at least it wasn’t until you took over 🤑
worldsurfleagues@therealferbersac it’s all about money now, it used to be drugs, but now it’s just hard cash 💰
mdennu98@worldsurfleagues Soul? Arsehole!

A third post festoons a photo of Chiba with a Slater/WSL pool.

Now, the standard cure for depression is drugs, exercise and so forth. But isn’t this an all-size-fits beatitude for gloom in general?

And how long y’think before this account gets yanked?

Click here, by the way. 

Teach me everything about your surfing...
Teach me everything about your surfing...

how-to-surf: “Like sliding across the kitchen floor in socks!”

Magazine for future engineers and serial killers breaks down the Sport of Kings!

It is summer in North America and time for the annual roll out of surf-related stories and articles in non-surf magazines. I generally like to peruse and giggle, rudely, about a misused term or misapplied lesson but enjoy the different perspective from, say, the Seventeen gal or Esquire guy. It’s like reading The Inertia except good and this morning I stumbled upon a gem Popular Mechanics’ How to Start Surfing.

When I was in high school, it was the future engineers and serial killers who loved their Popular Mechanics and so I wondered what sort of tips these sorts are being given today. The first few paragraphs not only didn’t disappoint, they mesmerized!

For all the great mystique surrounding surfing, it’s actually not that hard to ride a wave. On a huge board, in the right conditions, with a decent instructor, most people will get to their feet the first day. And it feels amazing—like sliding across the kitchen floor in your socks, only the floor is the ocean, and you’re walking on water.

The hard part comes when you love that feeling. When you decide you want to surf for real, and on your own. There’s equipment to master. Rules. Lingo. Tides. Swells. The sea is always changing, and you have to learn how and when it’s willing to play. You’ll go out in slop. You’ll get turned back by waves that are too big. You’ll get tossed around underwater and cut your feet on rocks and get smacked with your board. It’s humbling.

But it’s also worth it. One day, maybe in a year, or two years, or even three, you’ll paddle like mad into a glassy, green, unbroken wave, slide down its slope and dig your board’s edge (the rail) into its face, sailing right across its heft in a low crouch. When the wave breaks around you, you’ll skid out in front of the foam, letting it carry you farther in toward the beach, until you finally sink into the sea, face to the sky in exaltation, while your board pops out from under you like a champagne cork.

“Look!” a mom will say, towing her small child toward the beach, plastic bucket in hand. “A surfer!”

Bravo and well done, but it is the rest of the piece that truly amazed. Popular Mechanics broke down exactly what ocean temperatures require what wetsuit, questions from a non-surfer which includes, “How do I take off a wetsuit?”

A visual guide.

And the most simple/helpful lineup etiquette guide ever.

The rider has the right of way.

Don’t ditch your board.

Don’t drop in.

Face the horizon.

Again, bravo. The Inertia… are you taking notes?