…what would it be? It's a hypothetical that will tie you into knots!
As Bill Cosby said, perhaps while boiling a Quaalude broth, kids say the darnedest things. And ol’ fuck-everything Bill was right.
This morning, on a school run, one kid fiddling on the True Surf game, the other busy studying the lyrics to Eminem’s Killshot (“If I was three foot 11, you’d look up to me, and for the record, you would suck a dick to fuckin’ be me for a second, lick a ballsack to get on my channel…”), the gamer looked and me and asked:
“Dad, if you had to surf one wave for the rest of your life, what would it be?”
I’ve been mentally playing with a move to Hossegor, lately: cheaper than Bondi, a few less bankers throwing their SUPs around and all those photos from around the Quiksilver Pro haven’t hurt the dream.
I tell him, “Hossegor.”
“But what about winter?”
He got me.
Winter anywhere in France except the Alps sucks. The water halves in temperature. Big fronts hit the coast and it rains and blows without respite. In Hossegor, you hibernate in houses built for summer and ruin your teeth with red wine; your abdominal apron with cheese.
“So it’s gotta be tropical,” I say.
“Not necessarily,” he says. “Temperate works.”
Smart kid.
I tell him D-Bah. It ain’t my favourite wave in the world but it’s consistent, the water never gets cold and if life ain’t going the way I want it, I can always buy a package of ice and dream it away.
One wave for the rest of my life?
I move to D-Bah.
Where you gonna go?
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Steamer Lane! Its not an incredible wave but its situated so both swells from the south and north hit it! People dont realize most Cali spots only work on one direction swell, the Lane gets waves 300 days a year. The water is just cold enough that we dont get packs of brazilian surfers converging on it..
Wouldn’t the better question be ‘where’s the most consistent surf in the world?’. That’s where I want to be.
I mean, it;’s the best/worst part of surfing, being stuck in one place long enough to become a ‘local’, but then being condemned to surf it forever. I laugh at crew around here who only surf the stretch between the surf club and the creek, (about 400m), because it eliminates them from the best waves in the stretch north, (and south). Having a house within walking distance of the beach ties you to that section. Being a 5 minute drive away, opens up heaps more options and has lead me to much better waves on a consistent basis.
Lisbon? I’ve thought/dreamed about this a lot as well. Like some here, thinking wave zone (lifestyle and waves easily driveable) than single wave. Lisbon’s got on-land lifestyle in spades. It’s consistent throughout the year. It offers trunks weather part of the year. There are lots of options, styles of waves, orientations in a short drive. And sharks aren’t a consideration. Call me a P****, but if I had to settle on one wave I’d want one where didn’t have to block out the creeping fear of death while sitting alone at dusk.
I will take Angourie even though it is on my backhand, great wave and town. I am just a yank of moderate surf skill and was lucky enough to spend a year in the Lucky Country. I am sure the place is ruined now like everyplace else it seems.
i surf mud. i surf dirt. i surf adventure.
Well ur little set up at too shabby
Cactus
We’ll I’m obvs biased but good ol Newps ain’t bad. Year round, lots of variety, good work right up the hill.
https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Jakes in the ‘Barri. Fuck, if I was goofy I’d go out for a pack of darts, drive there and never return. Best wave in the world hands down. Best part? Never have to worry about kooks or SUPs. If the locals don’t sort them out the wave itself takes care of the nasty business. Show a bit of respect, be prepared to throw yourself into what would seem like certain death and be rewarded tubes deep enough you’ll nearly disappear up George Greenoughs bum hole. Plus I have a thing for the desert
How can Jbay not be the call on this.. even with sharks, cold and more.. when it is on, isn’t it the definition of beauty? I think I am aroused right now thinking about it.
Fuck that, walking up and down the cliff? What if it’s pumping and you wanna have 2 or 3 sessions?
There’s the right in a small town called Lemoore…
Not ballina with so many teeth, but any other north facing breakwall on the east coast of aus is guaranteed to provide for the rest of my days. https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Lakey Peak, Sumbawa… lefts, rights, back door barrels and high performance sections.
good call. short walk to big board heaven as well
It’s got to be a beachbreak! Never know if it’s going right or left, sometimes the banks dish up a pointbreaky wave, and when it’s super crap, the good days are gold!
Now, just think if you had to Surf one wave for the rest of your life. A perfect wave, but the exact same wave, for the rest of your life, like Kelly Slater’s wave, the exact same wave, over and over again, no variances, a perfect wave, the wave is always the same, perfect, you always know what it’s going to do, over and over and over again. Would it be paradise, or a nightmare?
Any one of several warm water Mexican beach breaks that I know of would work. Plenty of variety, swell, and lack of crowds.
Its good to see no-one has said Noisies
ruining your teeth with red wine; your abdominal apron with cheese. is better than any wave. Hossegor it is.
ballina
such a homer!
most consistent sub-tropical wave zone on Earth.
Nice gals, good food, best climate and tons of world class shapers.
Fly in ointment = white sharks.
Blacks is a solid call.