Creaky joints call the day!
The Triple Crown of Professional Surfing is officially here and has been for at least seven days and son of a bitch, nobody knows it. Nobody knows it at all. Folk on the mainland are watching college football or taking afternoon naps. Folk in Australia are waking up and going to church (just kidding).
Nobody is watching but why? Because the first jewel in the crown, Haleiwa, is considered a strange wave and the World Surf League completely destroys any storyline.
Why?
Why don’t the powers in Santa Monica’s High Tower push the Triple Crown of Professional Surfing like a Connor McGregor fight? It makes no sense to me. Haleiwa, Sunset and Pipeline, the combination of the three, winning across all three, is beautiful poetry.
In today’s Hawaiian Pro final, at Haleiwa, we have J. Parkinson, R. Christie, M. Herdy and D. Silva.
“J. Parkinson?” You ask. “Do you mean Joel? Isn’t he dead?”
Apparently not. The 50-year-old spent his final absolutely shredding, claiming and barking into the ears of boys 1/4 of his age.
Unseemly?
Not if a man hopes to win the Triple Crown of Professional Surfing but wait… is that Ross Williams back in the booth?
Ross Williams is back in the booth! Oh how he was missed. Oh how his critical analysis of professional surfing was missed.
But anyhow bravo, Joel Parkinson. He just won. He just took down the youth, the airs, the speed. Next year he will be dead but this year he is leading the Triple Crown of Professional Surfing.
Bravo.
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“Ross Williams is intolerable” button
Well you can you can tell Nick works as a journalist and isn’t a businessman. 128 surfers x $350 = $44,800, the prize money for final alone was $63k, im not going to even waste my time adding up the rest of the prize money. All I can say is those licensing fees must be massive to pay for the logistics, wages and prize money for the event and still make millions!!! Serious get ya shit together boys and at least do the numbers because this lame ass dogma driven ‘Cathy Newman style’ journalism is pathetic.
https://www.youtube.com/wat…
If it could be ensured that no event is held in waves < 6 ft, then power surfing would naturally come to life, and the true better guys would flourish with no need for pesky harassing gimmicks and tactics that some pursue today.
Power surfing delivered with style and class won. Great way to end the event.
Well here is one of the paradoxes in pro surfing. People seem to think it is like no soul, corrupt, whatever. But most pro surfers do it because they are absolutely and completely smitten by surfing and they are looking for a way to extend that into their lives. It’s their way of accommodating that need to keep surfing no matter what. It’s as footloose and free as any other way.
Good point. But they aren’t as fun to surf with as the regular working stiffs.
I dig Parko. Stoked for him to cruise with the win. The Triple Crown, to me, has always seemed to have a prestige beyond the tangibles (points, trophies, cash, etc). A competition of the hungriest gladiators of the sport, in surfing’s premiere gladiator pit: Hawaii. I’m pissing myself just thinking about it.
How can joel be 50? no way he is older than slater?
…you dont get sarcasm much do ya?
That was me being sarcastic!
ah, the irony…
If by zen you mean losing in underwhelming ways, I’d say Julian’s learning a whole lot..
Naw Chas..in Australia we (me) are waking up and checking Ebay/Gumtree to see what boards we bid on.Anybody????
I’ve got 3-4 that no prick wanted!!! Because they all asked volume with no fucking idea!!
They must be young.Im old
Yep it’s like until 5 years ago we all just went to a shaper or shop and picked up a 7’6” x 18 80s Pipe Gun to surf 2ft mushy beachbreaks ?
Yup. Best by dates on beer is another one that pushes stock off the shelves.
I think I once had a case which lasted 4 days and was tempted to ring the Guinness Book of Records to see if it was an Australian Record ?
Tom , tickle them with truth . Turn up the Volume and shout at them :
“ I Tom , being of sound surfing ability , do here by swear ( ya f*n idiots ) that this surfboard for sale is a 3 dimensional object designed and crafted to float on water and thus has volume ! “
Next they’ll be asking how many atoms of each element have been utilized ?
It is truly a dog fight when you factor in sponsor deals etc.
As with most business arrangements – it’s not what you know but who you know that is the determining factor. The “leg up” that the offspring of former pros have is immense.
The best Ca example I can think of is Kolohe.
Yawn. I’m just waiting for the Beachwaver Co. Maui Pro. I just wish I had hair so I could try their signature rotating hair iron.
Depends on the deal. The majority of the surfers ranked on the QS (there’s well over 1000) aren’t making money. The minority who are making an effort to close the gap toward qualification are covering costs or better one way or another.
Parko’s retirement should free up some $$ for some younger guys or maybe Italo will get a well deserved pay rise?
shut the fuck up baldy balls…
Yes! A Triple Crown win would be an incredible way to retire.
Kelly must be furious. Another amazing retirement story…
Or full length jeans out at Sunset 🤷🏽♂️
Or standing up on his board dancing and spinning around out the back of sunset singing rick astleys ” never gonna give you up”
Viewer #s broke a little over 6k for me for the final.
Anyone else notice theirs ?
Wonder if Trev is having a few coldies on the bongs Tab this arvo ?
If he ain’t then he’s blowing it.
You know what is funny, I don’t think Joel even wants to be going in heats right now. He is hanging for all this to be over. Maybe he’s loosened up as a result.