A Christmas promotion straight from the heart…
CHRISTMAS GIFT THE SURFBOARD BAG THAT CHANGES LIVES!
Pro-Lite Rhino Surfboard Travel Bag
$US178

I spent a majority of my life quietly hating surfboard bags. As a much younger man, right before heading to Yemen on a three-month long quest, my friends and I purchased two nine-foot coffins to carry our boards and gear. Our boards were normal sized, 5’11” whatever, but I think we felt the extra space would come in handy. It did not. Every day was a sweaty war, duct taping the bag over on itself so we could manage. It was bulky, uncomfortable hell and I cursed them every day, while cursing all surfboard bags.
Last year, I went on a surf trip to southern Mexico and the thought of struggling with another new nine-foot coffin that had somehow come into my life filled me with rage and so I marched down to Hansen’s Surf Shop and and asked the attendee which surfboard bag I should buy.
I chose the Rhino Surfboard Travel Bag and kid you not, it changed my life. My boards, a 5’8″ Mayhem Short Round and a 5’11” Super Brand Siamese Twin slid right in with no wrestling and no sticking to each other, there was ample slots for fins, wax, boardies etc. but the revelation was its padded strap that crossed the bag in a kitty-corner fashion.
“There’s only one choice…” he said, almost snorting that I didn’t know “… Pro-Lite.”
I chose the Rhino Surfboard Travel Bag and kid you not, it changed my life. My boards, a 5’8″ Mayhem Short Round and a 5’11” Super Brand Siamese Twin slid right in with no wrestling and no sticking to each other, there was ample slots for fins, wax, boardies etc. but the revelation was its padded strap that crossed the bag in a kitty-corner fashion.
A modern miracle, I realized when I picked it up at the airport and it didn’t swing across my body, clipping passersby with its aggressive torque. You know that awful reality, no? When your boardbag, held over shoulder, swings back and forth as you walk and you must spend an inordinate amount of energy keeping it straight?
The Pro-Lite bag stayed straight all by itself and was no more difficult to manage than a briefcase. Oh how I then cursed all those years of wandering in the uncomfortable hell. The experience was such a revelation that I also took the bag to Kelly Slater’s Surf Ranch even though it was unnecessary because there was plenty of room in Derek Rielly’s rental for stray boards.
Pro-Lite describes the Rhino bag thusly:
Weighing in at much less than a wheeled bag but packing in the same body foam and material the Rhino surfboard travel bag is perfect to have in your corner as you step into the ring with the airline check in attendant. This bag has 10mm foam protection designed for airline travel. Large exterior pockets with drainage will keep the crust off your boardshorts and the smile on your face. A sewn in divider provides the perfect separation to keep wax from switching boards. Need a place for your stash? Throw it in the secret pull out “storage” pocket. Don’t worry about salted zips on this bag; heavy duty molded non-corrosive zippers will keep the movement smooth for the life of the bag.
All fine and true and wonderful but it does not go far enough. This bag will change your loved one’s life and your loved one will be extremely grateful.
GIFT THE SURFBOARD THAT BRINGS FAMILIES TOGETHER!
Softlite 8’0″ Chop Stick
$A489.95

You are well aware that we are in the midst of a soft surfboard revolution. What were once tools of adult learners have become a dynamic component of high performance surf life. Jamie O’Brien, Chippa Wilson, Julian Wilson, Mason Ho, Mick Fanning, Steph Gilmore, etc. are all the proof of this pudding’s quality and a soft surfboard is now a necessary part of every quiver.
But which?
Oh of course that is a personal decision. You might enjoy a fun little 5’0″ thing or maybe a 7’0-er for those summer days when the ocean is almost flat but who doesn’t want to splash and play in the warm?
At first I put my daughter on a crusty 4’8″ thruster that I stole from Andrew Doheny many years ago. He had shaped it, if I recall, and I stole it from his house or maybe he gave it to me after an interview but it is terrible and I felt sorry for her so I acquired the Chop Stick.
For me and my house, I have Softlite’s 8’0″ Chop Stick in pink and let me explain.
My daughter, who had just turned four, was begging to surf, dying to surf. At first I put her on a crusty 4’8″ thruster that I stole from Andrew Doheny many years ago. He had shaped it, if I recall, and I stole it from his house or maybe he gave it to me after an interview but it is terrible and I felt sorry for her so I acquired the Chop Stick.
It was fantastic. There was all sorts of buoyancy, as you may expect, and I plopped her on the nose and paddled out to the lineup. We chatted and laughed, while waiting for a wave and when one came it was almost too easy to swing the board around and get in. She gingerly got to her feet while I angled down the line and it was worth anything, worth everything.
After she tired, I paddled back into the lineup alone and couldn’t stop smiling. Soft surfboards make surfing fun again, simply and purely fun, and if you get one for any one of your family members or friends you will be the one to enjoy.
It will be the gift you give yourself.
A HAT THAT BRANDS ITS WEARER AS A SURFER IN THE BEST SENSE OF THE WORD!
Dark Seas Division Roycraft Hat
$US29
Surfwear gets a bad rap and, let’s be honest for a moment here, it’s Billabong and Rip Curl’s fault. All surf brands used to ooze cool, exclusive, in-crowd but then Billabong and Rip Curl erected hideous stores everywhere, mostly in outlet malls, selling ghastly things that found their way onto the backs of fat inland uncles and even fatter inland aunts.
While you were wrinkling up your nose in disgust, though, brave young designers have been quietly remaking the game. Quietly reinventing what surfwear means. Taking the power back, as it were.
It’s no less than a revolution and Dark Seas Division is another perfect example of what you should be in/gifting.
Let us examine the Roycraft Hat in black and white. It may appear simple, neat and clean but it is no less than a radical declaration.
“I surf.”
And we all know that surfing beats all. It does so why not brand the ones you love as surfers? The days of running and hiding from your destiny is over. The upcoming 2019 has been declared by publication after publication to be the Year of the Surfer.
CHRISTMAS GIFT SKIN THAT GLOWS WITH HAPPINESS EACH DAY!
Sun Bum sun cream
$10 upwards

I had a cancer cut out of my chest earlier this year. It was no secret nor will it ever be a secret because a) I will never stray from scoop neck’d t-shirts and/or very unbuttoned button-ups b) the unsightly gash hovers above even the highest of my low-neck’d tees, even above a semi-appropriately unbuttoned button-up.
Could have it been avoided?
Yes.
By wearing sunscreen but it always felt so… uncool. So… mommy-ish or sporty or Coppertone not-for-me sexy until Sun Bum came into my life.
I don’t have to sell Sun Bum to you. It sells itself with chic packaging, quality ingredients, eye toward sustainability (it’s reef friendly on top of everything else) and most of all effectiveness. It works exactly as it should.
And seriously, is there a better stocking stuffer? Is there a better thing besides sweet satsuma tangerines to slip into a stocking than a cute bottle of SPF 30 sunscreen? What about a tube of mineral SPF 30 sunscreen lip balm?
Do you have a hardcore surfer in your life? Oh, there’s the entire signature line, in black, fragrance free so it won’t sting eyes and will stay on during the longest boat session.
There’s hair care, tanning amplifiers, baby shampoo… everything. Everything and there is no better stocking stuffer. I’m telling you as a father and husband who has stuffed stockings with Sun Bum to peels of happy laughter and genuine hugs. Genuine hugs that irritated my unsightly gash.
GIFT THE WETSUIT, TRUNKS, THAT ARE AS CORE AS IT GETS!
7 Seas 3/2 Wetsuit, $A329

Coral Reefer trunks, $A80

Did you know the story BeachGrit launched on four short years ago was Focus Group Creates Surf Brand. Names it Vissla? This was before our use of colons in the headers, exclamation marks or From the ______ Department. If the story was written today it would be either Breaking: Focus group creates surf brand, names it Vissla! or From the too-much-to-drink Department: Focus group creates surf brand, names it Vissla!
But neither would be accurate because fucking hell, neither are true.
Vissla is as core as it gets. Paul Naude, the brand’s founder, lives, eat, drinks, sleeps surf like no other and wants to recapture the magic in the septic demise of the “big three.” The feeling of being a surfer and being proud and being able to enjoy every bit of this damned life.
I make mistakes and I admit them.
Vissla is as core as it gets. Paul Naude, the brand’s founder, lives, eat, drinks, sleeps surf like no other and wants to recapture the magic in the septic demise of the “big three.” The feeling of being a surfer and being proud and being able to enjoy every bit of this damned life.
Need proof? They are here and happy, able to laugh, able to take a bad joke, able to carry on because it is a brand by surfers for surfers and if that ain’t refreshing in our Era of Outrage than i don’t know what is.
You should buy a wetsuit. A wetsuit that brands your best friend/wife/brother/adult child as knowledgeable, sophisticated, discerning. You know it already. You see the baby teal Vissla logo in the water and think, “That person knows what they’re doing.” I have a Vissla wetsuit (even though I don’t really know what I’m doing). it fits like a dream and don’t cost an arm or a leg. Watch it in action in our Jersey Wetsuit Fairytale.
You don’t love your best friend/wife/brother/adult child that much? Throw ’em a t-shirt, sweatshirt, hat, pair of boardies, jacket, beanie…. something.
Anything!
Vissla makes me smile. The brand understands what makes surfing great and I’m deadly serious just like I am for all of these gift suggestions. BeachGrit was founded on the principle of telling it like it is, or at least like it feels. Those who don’t get it can get bent.
Vissla gets it.
Buy and examine the trunks, here, and the 3/2 full suit here.
GIFT THE FINS THAT JOHN JOHN FLORENCE AND JORDY SMITH RIDE ON!
John John Florence Alpha Fins
$US75 (Made in the USA)

You don’t need me to tell you how wonderful Futures Fins are. You don’t need me to tell you how overjoyed your old man will be when he reaches down past the Satsuma tangerine into the deep recesses of his stocking and pulls out a brand-new pair of John John Alphas.
You don’t need me to tell you how easy it will be to steal them later when the wrapping paper is strewn about the living room and the little ones are alternately crying because they didn’t get an X-Box with Mortal Kombat.
Fins are very much fun and who could have ever guessed that? In, like, 1988 who would have imagined that fins would basically be as fun as boards and as sexy too. And let’s be honest, John John knows the sexiest fin are Futures.
In truth they are just better and I’ve never met a man, woman or child who disagrees with that sentiment. Never had a man, woman or child tell me they like surfing most when their fins fall out and their board transforms, as if by magic, into an alaia.
Your old man will be thrilled, anyhow, or any of your loved ones or you yourself when you “borrow” them.
Nobody doesn’t like Futures.

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sunbum is crap
Chas, I’m with you for sure on your sentiments regarding Vissla, and I meet my silly surf consumer “needs”(and wants, because humans can survive after all without a pair of Sofa Surfers) by giving up the bank account on Vissla goods (at the best surf shop in New Jersey by the way, Gordon’s Surf Shop)… but I love the fact most comments here have next to nothing to do with surf commercialism (my comment in its attempt to cross-promote at the local mom-and-pop shop level, being the most egregious of course)… more and more and more, “I come to Beach Grit to read the comments” is climbing the charts for “why Beach Grit is my FIRST daily stop for the globally pivotal and humanely necessary world of Surf Journalism…
Futures, yes! But Blackstix? God I love Blackstix.
A mausoleum to Di for ……
like all but the hat. it screams brody jenner. and nobody wants that label.
Those fins are plastic Chas.
I see the baby teal Vissla logo in the water and think, “That person must be cold.”
Didn’t see Erik Logan name anywhere…. don’t these guys know where their Butter comes from?
Is there a cheeseburger cat meme that says “Too Much Advertorial”?
Ha ha, there should be, but god, have you seen the rest of the internet? This is aggressively tame, relatively speaking. And they aren’t even slummin’ for that oh-so-tempting Amazon affiliate cash!
Oh how do you get some of that?
That’s the thing where if people shop on Amazon through your affiliate portal you get something like 1% of what they spend? Set it up Derek, I’d do it, fuck my kid’s school, and the food bank Beach Grit must survive!
You have mail, my dude
I only look at Beach Grit, some swell and snow forecasts (something rare and very special might happen up here middle of next week!), and play Sudoku on my phone. So no, I haven’t seen the rest of the internet. It sounds scary though. Thank you for protecting me, high jumping beach lady!
You are very wise! I would avoid it too, if I could!
Damn, and I thought Stabs advertorials were the best in the business. Way to step it up!
Sun Bum is garbage. Do not buy for blocking sun. It might work for batin’ in a pinch.
We’re number 1 across categories!
I survived two weeks at the Modern in Honolulu dressed only in Sun Bum!
I got sunburnt in Portugal in December! You’re probably a finely Bronzed Aussie and not a pasty NW Americano like myself. It’s like 240 days of gray here and I burn by moonlight. My skin sparkles #teamedward.
I think sloppy application on your part. I was lavish. Many hands were used to butter me in Sun Bum.
Which, incidentally, is the official suntan lotion of The Modern, as well as BeachGrit.
I’m soon headed to Bali and beyond where small oiled hands are cheap and plentiful. I’ll try your technique there! Otherwise it’s a burkini for me.
what part of pac nor-west. I love that part of the world.
An endearing little white trash fishing village full of meth, trailer parks, and “grumpy locals” in Washington state. It’s about 3 hours from two major cities and Canada comes here too so there’s no shortage of foam boards, GoPros and visitors who paddle straight to the peak, miss set waves and paddle for the next one, and/or don’t wait their turn. Current water temp: 48f/9c
You need protection?
Can confirm it works. Living in a ski town in BC and can survive Mexico and currently oz on that stuff. it still blows my mind that oz sun is gnarlier than mexico…
“Surfing beats all,” and professional skateboarder Adrian Lopez laughs all the way to the bank when we buy his hats!
Shit that’s Adrian Lopez’s company? I’m gonna start buying their shit now.
Used to watch thrill of it all every day before school.
Let’s be honest, Mystery kinda sucked (sucks?) though.
in an attempt to totally avoid christmas for good i snagged a hindu with jewish extended family. it didn’t work, they all love fucking christmas. it makes me sick.
Do you have a wild Makar Sankranti?
nah, they’re all about diwali
Who isn’t! All those pretty lights!
And the food!
She or he must be cute ? Two of the most beautiful women I ever met came from Israel and India .
Yeah, I got lucky. Aging well too! Haha.
Mate she got lucky and you ain’t dead yet !
My daughter wants the soft board because “DAD IT IS PiNk” !
Pink is an easy sell.
i have an MF soft board that fucking rips.. I go out in the shitbags and paddle in early and drop and focus on trying to throw buckets… so fun!!! probably got an extra 30 sessions this year because of it. you can hide behind that its your kids
MMM. The very generous Publicly funded Surf Club ( with its own surf school and 2 storey clubhouse ) in the little village I lived in, in France gave free access to the soft boards since the late 80s . Had so much fun over 20 years, sometimes nude , on the so called flat days with perfect little point type runners in the ankle to shin high range . The only problem I had , is when I finally got a knee high one , I wished that I had actually brought out the high performance short board .
I was ripping on one little stretch on it this past fall, surfing circles on a point break with the 1200$ art projects that were buoying around.. I really think it helps your surfing.. it makes you lay turns using your back foot.. and when you swing one it feels so nice.. plus the floaters on closeouts are like pillows on the landing. someones said to me one day.. I don’t think anyone was having as much fun as you were that day.. LOL.. it was classic.
1. A meshback cap will grace my head when Hell freezes over.
2. I once came back from Hawaii and had to cross London via the tube at rush hour with a over-stuffed boardbag and large suitcase. Man oh man, you think Hawaiian stink-eye is bad…. sheeeesh.
You sure they weren’t stares of envy? You, man of ocean, they, moles of the underground?
In a perfect World ! I had a heated diplomatic discussion for nearly 45 minutes with a Troglodyte bus driver of an inter airport service between Heathrow and Gatwick before he let me gently place 5kg of fragile fiberglass encased in a travel bag onto Golf Bags and Luggage designed to survive a Nuclear f’in Holocaust .
Meanwhile, women and sissies melted into their seats…
…And men grumped at their own lack of relative machismo.
Saying things like, “I bet he doesn’t even…read.”
hey, how you feeling about your adopted home land (the EU), good article on the troubles may, macron and the chancellor are trying to negotiate right now and all the populist crap coming out in Hungary and other spots. check it out. ..https://http://www.axios.com/angela-merkel...
oh and nice stabvatorial Chas.. I like that you are straight on this one.. no pussy footing around and making it look like you “really” are a user of any of these items.
I actually use everything here!
I know. I was being serial. I hope u are getting paid in all honesty. U guys deserve to get paid. My point was that in the other dark web places they hide behind editorial web bs for adverts. Surfline and the stuff. Sorry that quotes was for stab not you. bad writing on my part. I don’t get paid
I hate advertorial so so so bad and swore, when Derek and I sat at my kitchen counter and pressed “publish” for the very first time, that we would only push product we actually believed in. I know commerce is nasty but…. these are all honest suggestions. From me to you!
I’ve been chickening out on getting my skin cancer cut out because I didn’t want to miss surf.
Going under the knife next week.
Does it hurt?
Mine also on chest.
So surprisingly bad! Mine was pretty huge but son of a gun they cut it and fry it and sew it. Ouch!
Jesus, too late to cash I suppose
All you feel is the tugging as the knife slices through the skin. Deeper the cancer, deeper the blade.
Well I hope they paid u. Free ain’t free besides for “thoughts and prayers”
Strange times around the world . The New World blames poor immigrants for all its woes while the Old World blames the people in charge ? Go figure ?
u read that? great website
Thanks 3Ms . Interesting reading . Just disappointed that everyone loves Billionaires and blames homeless refugees for all the world’s ills .
Oh fo shizzle!
There I was; young, handsome, bronzed and obviously just back from doing something inordinately fun while they sucked it up in the grey gloom.
But also because I’m also a huge kook and kept banging into people!
A bit of reverse colonialism just to show ‘em how it feels ?
I claim this train carriage for the Kingdom of ChannelBottom and declare it Terra Nullis !
This for sending over Capt Cook, you bastards!!!
Word up !
You really have to question someone who made the life choice to live in London, England. Where dreams go to die. How did the girls end up so bad when surrounded by nations with such purity?
…I’m guessing you’re an ex-pat? If not, you ain’t got a river-surfing leg to stand on.
I sure as shit didn’t live in London!
Bah humbug. I can’t afford xmas anyway.
Live it up. You’ll be gone before you know it.
Will I need to suffer anymore BG direct marketing before then?
Hopefully many many more times!