Breaking: “World’s lamest surf assault” challenged by “aggressive leash pull incident” in Venice!

"We are filing a police report now that we have more footage from another vantage point."

The Inertia has the best story in all of surf today and I’m not going to pretend otherwise. I’m not going to sit here and pretend there is anything that even comes close to Venice Beach-Based Surf School Owner Under Fire After Aggressive Leash Pull Incident and I’m not going to pretend that it doesn’t challenge Derek Rielly’s crack reporting on Watch: The world’s lamest surf assault!

I’ll give you the rough details here. It was a day like any other in Venice Beach, California. The waves were horrible and dumb. A Brazilian man, Wagner Lima, who owns Brazilian Surf Club, was out amongst it as was a Senegalese Olympic hopeful, on whom NBC was shooting a profile, and her host Danielle Lyons. Also shooting photos from the pier was Rhonda Harper, the owner of Black Girls Surf.

Ms. Lyons paddled for a wave, Mr. Wagner dropped in, faded behind her and pulled her leash, Ms. Harper captured every motion in crystal clear frame by detail.

Ms. Lyons went to Yelp and wrote:

I was surfing at Venice Beach pier with a friend for over an hour, all the locals were super chill and friendly sharing waves all morning until Wagner showed up and decided to be a bully.

I was up and riding on the peak and he decides to try to block me, so I turned around him, then he drops in behind me and pulls my leash causing me to fall. Not only is what he did super dangerous, it’s assault. If I was a novice surfer I could have knocked my teeth out.

In all my years of surfing I’ve never been attacked unprovoked like this. I gave this guy every opportunity not to be a dick, hell I even gave him room to share if he was that hard up for a two foot wave.

I’m not sure if this was localism, racism or sexism there were two black women in the line up and he targeted me for whatever reason.

Then Black Girls Surf went to Instagram and added:

https://www.instagram.com/p/BrBP5denU1m/

There is absolutely NO EXCUSE for this. His name is Wagner Lima. He’s a Brazilian surf instructor in Venice, CA. He owns @braziliansurfclub. We are filing a police report now that we have more footage from another vantage point. He knew this was a filmed surf session prior to this incident. I watched him from the pier and took a sequence of photos. We’re going after him. His yelp reviews are as horrible as he is…this kind of behavior in the water needs to end. Surfing is about fun. This situation was pure hate.

And, seriously, I haven’t chuckled this much sinc…..

Damn it. I just spit coffee on my computer. The Inertia strikes back.

In all seriousness, I get that we live in aggrieved times, outrageous times, and that the women involved here felt there could be a racial or sexist component to the aggressive leash pulling incident but… do you think it was completely necessary for them to mention Wagner Lima’s Brazilian nationality at each and every turn? I mean, doesn’t that further perpetuate the stereotype that all Brazilian surfers are snakey li’l bastards? That it was in Mr. Lima’s Brazilian DNA to do something like this?

Just kidding, that wasn’t in all seriousness. I am going to write a three-act play titled Venice Beach-Based Surf School Owner Under Fire After Aggressive Leash Pull Incident though and expect to win many Tony Awards, though.

One last thing. Between Stab magazine’s Ashton Goggans, the former World’s Lamest Surf Assault and the new “aggressive leash pull” what do you think police around this great nation think when their phones ring and a surfer is on the other line with a complaint?

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Techamaki
Techamaki
7 years ago

https://uploads.disquscdn.c…
Who is up first? Falling near the pier could’ve been dangerous.

Thetruth
Thetruth
7 years ago

The leggie tug is a discrete heads up that you are being a pain in the arse in the line up , without actual physical contact or verbal conflict.

Stringer Bell
Stringer Bell
7 years ago

Two foot? Haha turn it up charger. There’s no way that’s bigger than 1.5

SOA fan
SOA fan
7 years ago

I think it makes YOU sound like a sexist racist asshat.

Techamaki
Techamaki
7 years ago

Wow! You’re just an asshole, aren’t you?

Peter Germann
Peter Germann
7 years ago

I got my leash tangled on kelp and I fell about 10 years ago. After I lost my law suit against the world, I took my vengeance. If you have noticed less kelp in the lineup lately, you can blame or thank me . . . or nature. 2 decades earlier I cut myself on a coral reef. I mean, I was assaulted by a coral reef, but my legal team told me not to incriminate myself. See my Etsy account for coral trinkets of all sizes and please contribute to my “it’s not me it’s global warming” godfundme page to help pay my legal fees. Hope you all find a safe space out of the lineup.

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago

Pull on this boy’s leash:

https://www.theguardian.com…

Jordy's pout
Jordy's pout
7 years ago

I tend to gloss over a lot of the underlying racist and/or sexist comments on BG due to my own cognitive dissonance and hypocrisy.

But comments like this really cross a line. You’re making a ‘joke’ about tracking down a woman you don’t know so that you can be violent towards her. There’s nothing remotely humorous about that.

Pepper me with rotten tomatoes and unwashed dildos for saying this, but when it comes to my position on race, class and gender I’m 100% Inertia. But my DNA is made up entirely of self-effacing-high-low-brow-shit-talk so I’ll be burdened by the siren song of the grit forever…

SOA fan
SOA fan
7 years ago
Reply to  Jordy's pout

Thank you for voicing this. I AGREE.

channelbottom
channelbottom
7 years ago

Blow Job Job?

Lorlac
Lorlac
7 years ago

I’ve only read the Instagram caption and I already have a smile from ear to ear. What a gift to BG

Lorlac
Lorlac
7 years ago
Reply to  Lorlac

Back after reading this in full. Many chuckles

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago

Don’t forget hate crime.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago

Oh, this gives me the shakes. Eerie.

The Bitchy Crab
The Bitchy Crab
7 years ago

Did you know Kennedy was shot while sitting in a Lincoln? Eerie too.

janeausten
janeausten
7 years ago

?Hinded. Got photos of a good Hinding you had lately.

Paul Taublieb
Paul Taublieb
7 years ago

ugh, makes me feel a little dirty

REALLY
REALLY
7 years ago

The new deal will be surfing police in the lineup, whenever there is a swell, cops will be out in force like the 4th of July…. shaking us all down in the lineup.

Just love that we all need to be policed

Techamaki
Techamaki
7 years ago
Reply to  REALLY

I hate the thought of the “wave police”.

Paulo De Tarso Duarte
Paulo De Tarso Duarte
7 years ago

Let tell you Scott
Reptile is one of the most, if not the best, fantastic twin harmony guitar solos, by Wilson Piper on the Rickenbacker and Peter Koppes on the Fender…
Just sublime, lyrics and music!

PacificNorthPest
PacificNorthPest
7 years ago

All the SJW silliness aside, from what I read this guy was chaffed even before he got in the water that these women were in the line up and was generally acting the aggro dick. The leash pull whatever. But that he felt that he had some legitimate greivance because this lady was in the water and so generally bullied her? I don’t like that sort of man.

Let me ask a question about the relative merits of two things. If he feels that it’s okay for him, a grown ass man, to act like that in the water, why shouldn’t she sue him? Suing him is excessive and self-righteous. As was bullying her in the first place. Why should she have to be better than him, particularly since she was minding her own business and he started it?

Lorlac
Lorlac
7 years ago

Because suing people for stuff sucks

Techamaki
Techamaki
7 years ago

I agree, but I’m against bringing in the “wave police”. You would be surprised how many times women get bullied out in the lineup by blocking, snaking and pulling on leashes. It was newsworthy because she had high quality photographs that captured him trying to snake her and then pulling her down by the leash causing her to fall. If he respected priority, he shouldn’t have dropped in on her in the first place and his leash wouldn’t have gotten tangled underneath her board. If her leash did get caught underneath his surfboard, he could’ve just pushed the nose of his surfboard down to untangled it. He didn’t have to pull on it.

Owen's Outgoing Tide
Owen's Outgoing Tide
7 years ago
Derrick Hind
Derrick Hind
7 years ago

We could employ a LyoTardian deconstructivist meta-narrative and ask whether he is persecuting a Black Surfer, a Female Surfer or a Black Female Surfer. She would have quite an array of choices at her disposal if this was the Oppression Olympics.

surfmom
surfmom
7 years ago

We need more representation in one simple and specific thing for an unrelated, complex, and vague thing.

Brutus
Brutus
7 years ago
Reply to  surfmom

so you are a she as in we ?


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