Or the case for a real-life big-wave event on a tour that studiously avoids size…
Oh I’m sure you can remember the events of 2012 when, despite being altered to the arrival of a large swell, the then ASP called off the Volcom Fiji Pro in glassy fifteen-foot waves, which were then subsequently paddled into by a coterie of big-wavers.
“We’re not a big-wave tour,” then ASP chairman Richie Grellman, who’d previously worked with an accounting firm for 32 years, said. “If the surf happens to be big, that’s of interest to some people. A lot of people like to see the skill and ability of surfers in small-medium conditions.”
The head judge, Rich Porta, said, “We (the ASP) have taken a hit, obviously, for the (World Tour) boys not going in the water. It was a loss for us.”
Nothing has changed.
“If the surf happens to be big, that’s of interest to some people. A lot of people like to see the skill and ability of surfers in small-medium conditions.”
Some years Teahupoo is eight foot for the CT, sometimes Pipe is ten for a day. It ain’t twenty-five foot Jaws or Mavs.
I doubt there would be a finer spectacle than watching WCT surfers, whose ability on a surfboard is beyond reproach, learning the mechanics of Jaws; of their shapers having to learn the craft of building a blunderbuss and their charges having to decode the mysteries contained within ten-feet-and-six-inches of fibreglass and foam.
I wonder:
Would there be an alignment of ratings if one, or two, big-wave events appeared on a schedule dominated by easy points, beachbreaks and an inland lake?
Would a big-wave event be the colourful lure that convinced John John to put his white knee-highs back on and dig out his lipstick?
Or would it end in too much sobbing, feigned injuries and days called off for being too big?
Big wave and competition don’t gel together, like facebook and trustworthy, or WSL and transparent. As soon as surfers need to be brave for points – they just end up making rash choices.
That video just highlighted how much all paddlers were on the wrong equipment, because of some shortsighted rule set by some shortsighted contest. Surfers should be allowed to choose their logs (tow, paddle, fart-powered…) and let the hardest charger get the prize of buying everyone else a drink.
First off, how many people actually can sit back and watch a BWT event as is that is not Jaws. The waiting periods would need to be massive, and the lulls between sets are painstakingly long and the action is slow. 6 man heats barely prove to keep any sane mans interest due to a serious lack of action. Let the big wave guys have their specialty. What’s next? Adding in a longboard stop and a groovy retro comp to see who is the best all around surfer? I would rather see Lowers and Cloudbreak back, and a proper waiting period Chopes.
in all fairness, there is a cunt hair of interest in one event, so maybe all the Brazzo’s can drown and order will be restored on the WCT.
no doubt, but as the public face of both the company and a big player in WSL/pro surfing it was still strange that he was never asked the question.
It would be strange were we not talking about professional surfing.
Remember when the ASP’s Top 44 took on big Wiamea in the ’88 Billabong Pro? It was amazing and only 2 guys didnt step up.
I don’t wanna go all Ben Marcus on ya but it was 1986 and there wasn’t a top 44 back then, it was 16 seeds and 16 trialists. And yeah! it was amazing.
I don’t mind being corrected by one of our sports great Wordsmiths. I have a VHS tape of it, but no VCR to watch it on anymore.
QUESTION
IS BEACHGRIT THE HAPPIEST GAYEST PLACE IN TOWN.?
Hell yes.
Our rallying cry could be:
“Up yer Gritter!”
THANK YOU
SEE YOU AT THE MARDI GRAS😄
I love the days called off when the waves get too good!
Social Justice Surf Warrior tour, sponsored by Dirk Marx.
Everyone is equal, so totally super!
Of course, some are more equal than others….but that’s for us to decide.
When is the WSL’s Circus not a Circus ?
When it’s an Animal Farm and the Pigs have control of the coffers while Shepherd ELo searches for aquatically challenged adult lambs , with his crook , in an attempt to augment the size of the flock ?
Not bad good try, I was thinking more along the lines of:
World Surfing Tour to Inspire Adult Learners and Rinse Kit Users Worldwide – AKA Jerks Tour for Jerks the good old JTJ.
If it’s 10ft plus points should be increased for making the finals.
They should also have a comp at Puerto
or Kelly’s wave pool?
How about a 10% bonus on all points? That’d get Jordy’s attention.
They need a cold water spot. Throw em in at Ocean Beach SF before the triple crown.
first things first: get Robert K. Slater to do another informal vetting of the Ziffs’ and honour his contract for a 3 year sponno of Fiji.
Imagine if he had to stump up and pay for it !
Like a normal investor would be made to.
I honestly think it would send him spinning out of control and into full depression.
I hope Kelly lets me get near him at Snapper this year.
That will be the first thing I ask him: What happened to the 3 year sponno of Fiji you put your name to?
Don’t rub up against kalani and don’t approach him
For realz??
I’m seeing the real picture now
Some sad shit.
That’s not what you said Bex… and besides, you know I have a hard on for you.
Yeah I can feel it from here
Was pretty fucken tame.
Did Slats call Charlie?
This site has a rep for the plucking of low hanging fruit but Derek and Chas are witty enough to pull it off.
No offence, but you’ve got abit of work to do…
So Wives, Mothers and Girlfriends? it’s gotta be hilariously original to stay.
No offence or advice taken.
It was hilarious and original and not at all smutty, unlike your laurel and hardy mates
Too late for Wilko and Connor O who finished 1st and 2nd at Cloudbreak in 2017 and may be still on tour had the Goat honoured the contract .
Yes yes and yeah
One death wave contest per year.
You’re on top of your shit today dreks
I haven’t slept a wink since yesterday! First you threw the sleaze rug over me and then Oz said I had the surf tools of a donkey.
Both charges painfully true, howevs.
Being talked about is what matters.
Noone talks about whoevers killing stab.
I could have given you a great little pulp non-fiction story yesterday but noone took the bait.
I’ll take the bait now.
Lay on McDuff.
You and SSD were only ones who liked it.
Too late now, I save the dancing monkey routine
For mrs videos.
God, you tease!
Is Stab being killed? I thought it flourishing.
I just tried to read what should have been a good story on who was the hardest shredder last year and it was unreadable.
7hour old story with 12 comments.
Its gonna be 13 in a sec.
You got better things to do than being some weirdo who rips.
It’s more than a bit unfair of someone like that being critical of others’ lack of natural ability in their (the pro’s) skill set.
I mean… it’s like a falcon teasing a chicken for not flying so good.
Ozzie, on behalf of Dezza: Fuck you.
I certainly won’t be buying one of your novelty tail pads again.
“A falcon teasing a chicken for not flying so good.” Is the gulf the same as a falcon and a chicken? Yes, yes, I guess it is! Now that I’ve given up the sport, any similarly pointless activities I should pursue, IYHO?
Analogy was a bit extreme as differing species, but the point stands that it was a dick-move. What a bully.
You just keep surfing, donkey or not.
Pretty much anything can be seen as a pointless activity, depending on your vantage point.
Can we be sure, D ?
He may have been trying to be complimentary saying, “You have the tool of a donkey.”
In Israel, he did write a song called “Derek is having phone sex.”
“with a donkey”?
the most photogenic surf style though, of any surf journalist since Nick Carroll lost his hair.
It’s all in the wings. Very Blades of Glory. (Something JP might appreciate.)
thats the second time I got to upvote oz calling you a donkey. keep it coming.