Welcome to 2019, the #yearofnopaddle!
It is Friday, January 4th and The World Surf League’s President of Content, Media and WSL Studios has officially been on the job for three days, assuming he didn’t head into Santa Monica’s High Tower on New Year’s Day.
I have so many burning questions. What was his first order of business? Is he getting along with everyone? Does he miss his old office in the Oprah Winfrey Network?
But I have even more burning questions about his first Instagram post as our official President. Let’s really study.
First, he writes:
Cruising into 2019. Mission for this year – MORE FUN. Back into the morning routine, up early to catch a few waves start the day, then off to the office! #bestwaytostarteveryday // What’s your routine? #liveandloveyourpassion #longboarding #surf #yearofnopaddle?
Oh, of course I don’t care what your #bestwaytostarteveryday is but is he really losing the paddle? Like really really?
More importantly, though, the picture. The number of possibilities held herein is virtually uncountable and what do you think our president did?
A) Backdoor the section and come out with the spit.
B) Hit the lip, blowing out the fins.
C) Hit the lip and soar into the sky, air reverse.
D) Hit the lip and soar into the sky, full rotation.
E) Drawn out bottom turn around the first barrel before tucking into a long runner.
F) Midface 360.
G) Other.
I don’t offer “walk the nose” “drop knee bottom turn” classical anything because ain’t no way Elo goes that way.
He is progressive.
But what do you think he did on this little gem?
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Yeah, I don’t SUP either. But being about the same age as you, or maybe a couple years younger, I have been riding some boards sometimes that have more volume than I used to ride. And sometimes longboards are fun. What can I say? Guilty as charged.
It takes a lot of balls Scott, for you to say this on Beach Grit, the home of E-Lo bashing and anti longboarding sentiment. (Actually anti-any kind of waveriding besides high performance shortboarding).
But I will boldly stand beside you SSD, and concur that yes, he is surfing everyday and that is more than me or probably most of his haters that comment on this site every day surf. If he surfs everyday, that is a good thing and I salute him for that. I do admit that he is kinda goofy and overzealous which makes him an easy target for self centered, stuck up surfers who think they are the coolest thing to walk the beach since the shortboard revolution. So let’s see E-Lo and Chas have a surf off!
That’s a good way to settle this constant criticism. Oh yeah, but if Chas loses, he will still criticize E-Lo, because he rides a longboard. And Chas thinks all longboarders are kooks and any type of surfcraft besides a 5’10” thruster is grounds for ridicule.
But that is part of why I keep coming back to Beach Grit, because it is funny and entertaining. Even if I don’t agree with everything published here, Chas is a humorous writer who makes me laugh often.
I just hope he doesn’t see what kind of boards I sometimes ride, or I would never be able to escape his relentless, attack- dog ridicule plastered all over the internet next to my name. I tell you, I wouldn’t want to be in Chas’s sights like E-Lo is, that would be embarrassing!
Should’ve gone left.
Herr Professor Doctor Todd ( tricky dicky ) Richards will be discussing the importance of Urethane ,Ball Bearings , Wood, Concrete , Ramps and Skate shoes in his seminal study on Hydrodynamics and Surfing “ I Skate , Therefore I Am “ ( An Expert on Everything ) ? ………..Next week CB and myself will be discussing Buddha and the importance of his work in the hot dog industry and cocktail bars in the latest series of “ Make Me One with EVERYTHING “ ?
ok just listened to the grit and bullfuckingshit David hasnt seen a starwars movie. either he deliberately avoids syfy or he’s full of shit.
fuck’n calf leash?
The scoop of 2019 is going to be an interview with Elo’s chief photographer. If he is too busy you could get one of his assistants.
Wonder if Elo knows what a paddle out is
Rode out in front of close out section then dolphin dive onto whitewater/out the back then quick stand up on sandbar and long hand over hand leash pull and back out there !
It still looks like a SUP board he’s riding, just minus the paddle (the club). Maybe he ditched the paddle after using it to catch the wave.
Apparently pondering the age old question “what do i do with my hands?” made famous by non other than Ricky Bobby in Talladega Nights, Elo is really struggling for something to hold onto. Now that his sacred dagger of the sea is no longer in his grasp!!!
Pumped down the line awkwardly, then proceeded to fall and dislocate his shoulder.
He did whatever the fuck he want cuz he President! Vivo El Presidente! Speaker knew this shit would blow up bigger than NFL and he was right!
I love sarcasm.
“What my routine” paddle out solo, burn anyone that attempts to surf any wave that’s I see as mine. Knee boards and SUP are yelled at from a distance to stay the fuck away!
Oh, and NO CAMERAS are aloud on beach.
So ytou’re a bit like Tara Ruttenberg then.
What if they are very quiet cameras?
Elo’s style is way better than mine. I want to see a bit of backhand action sometime though…
The only way to settle this blood feus is a Chaz vs, ELO surf off.
A shark ate him
Hell be replaced by some guy from Ellen’s show
This fucking guy. Anyone who posts shit like that on IG is a complete poser.
What are the chances that we see Elo get real aggressive and step down to a mid-length board before the end of the year?
Real aggressive like Wardo on the LOST 5’5” ?
Given Wardo’s history out of the water, I’d classify his work on a 5’5” as mildly aggressive.
I do most of my surfing hungover these days…these happy people annoy me.
We need to see the before picture where he whistles the guy on the inside off, and we need to see the after picture where this lip smacks him in face.Actually..a video would give the real truth of this wave.