“Joe Rogan and Laird Hamilton are little wimpy sissies!”
Derek Rielly has been on such a BeachGrit heater lately that last night I felt very bad. He’s posted story after story after story all while being shuttled around Australia giving interviews in the wake of the iconic Bob Hawke’s passing.
As you well know, Derek wrote the definitive biography of the beloved figure in his inimitable style. It is a gorgeous book. Profound, moving, original and illuminating. I have no doubt that it will win every important Australian award this year which made me feel even worse.
Derek is a literary juggernaut, a lion, and still posting story after story while I sit home, henpecking an indecipherable book about the Global War on Terror and failing you.
In order to rectify, I hurriedly googled “surf” then clicked “news” to find something.
And there sat Laird Hamilton across from Joe Rogan.
“Perfection!” I thought, poured myself yet another vodka soda and clicked play, ready to do the hard yards for you. For us. For Derek.
I hated every second and turned it off after 20 minutes.
I understand the concept of eating healthy and working out. What I don’t understand is talking about eating healthy and working out. Or, worse still, listening to someone else talk about eating healthy and working out.
For two plus hours.
In any case, Laird n Joe started talking about saunas near my capacity and how 225 degrees Fahrenheit is, like, crazy hot and difficult to handle.
“Sissies!” I thought. “Joe Rogan and Laird Hamilton are little wimpy sissies!”
Now, I’ve never had occasion to think this before but I could out sauna those two in my sleep. I’ve spent a good third of my life in the world’s largest sauna (the Middle East) and could sauna those two under the table with one arm tied behind my back.
I somehow need to make this happen. It could be for charity and maybe I’ll reach out to my pal Erik “ELo” Logan, the World Surf League’s President of Content, Media, Third Party Licensing Rights, Etc. for Laird’s contact info. Maybe it should be a WSL sanctioned sauna-off.
Speaking of ELo, I met with David Lee Scales at the Surf Heritage and Culture Center and we spoke of the Shellacking in Santa Monica, David Lee’s ripping, surfing with your partner and many other important things. Then David Lee’s computer died and the whole thing got erased so we started over and did it again.
It is our best show yet two times over!