Ecologically catastrophic. Or is it?

Now, in a conundrum not seen since medieval scholastics debated how many angels could fit on the head of a pin, we have What Would Greta Thunberg Do? An reductio ad absurdum so thickly layered, so powerfully fraught that the most intelligent minds of our day will be driven utterly mad.

To wit, researchers in Newcastle, England just discovered a biofuel cleaner, better, more cost-effective, powerful and theoretically more renewable than old french fry grease. The holy grail? Shangri-la? Let us go ourselves to that Jolly Pendulum and learn.

A new paper by a team of researchers from Newcastle University in England describes a cheaper, if controversial, alternative source for biodiesel: shark livers.

Livers can make up to 30 percent of a shark’s body mass and sharks are a large fraction of by-catch in many fisheries. Since livers are often a waste product of fisheries—and are sometimes even dumped at sea because of their low value—they have potential as an inexpensive source material for biodiesel. As well, extracting the oil is relatively simple. When placed in the sun, the livers melt, releasing the fatty oil that can be mixed with a catalyst and alcohol to make a commercial grade of biodiesel.

While it sounds like a plausible way to use an often-discarded waste product, there are potential problems with the idea. Of primary concern is the difficulty determining the source species for the oil and whether the livers were a byproduct of a legal fishery or the target of an illegal one.

“I would hate to incentivize killing sharks for fuel,” says Adam Harvey, a coauthor of the paper, adding that “if the sharks are already dead, it’s best to get as much a value out of them as possible.”

From an economic standpoint, if a market develops for another use of shark livers, it could contribute to collapsing shark populations, making the potential shark liver biodiesel industry short-lived, cautions Simpfendorfer. From an ecological standpoint, it would be catastrophic. He adds, “the next step is to make sure we don’t dive into this without thinking very critically about it.”

Now, back to dear Greta. I don’t know that she has any great love for sharks and might well sacrifice them for a cooler climate but… if the shark’s decimation could contribute to a catastrophic ecology then I can’t imagine she’d be pleased.

So?

WWGTD?

Word of caution, Elon Musk has already been driven utterly mad pondering this enigma.

Blue Crushing the man!

Have you ever stopped to consider what our professional surfing world, this professional surfing life, would be without Pipeline? The crown jewel of Oahu’s North Shore gives the professional surf fan our meaning, in many ways. Our raison d’etre and imagine if the World Surf League Championship Tour ended in… Brazil, say. Or Lemoore. Very sad.

Well, as you know, the women do not get to end their season in Pipeline and don’t have any contests there but would like for this harsh Pipe-less reality to be shattered on the shoals of equality. Shall we turn to the sporting website FanSided for more?

Yes?

Ok.

Known as the mecca of surfing, the little stretch on the beach on the North Shore of Oahu aka Pipeline has been the home of the last contest on the men’s championship tour (CT) for years. In 2010 women were barred from competing there, having to finish their seasons in other Hawaiian locations such as Honolulu Bay.

Now the women are no longer willing to stand by while the men get to catch the greatest waves in the world. The Committee for Equity in Women’s Surfing along with representative Heidi Tsuneyoshithe are now lobbying for a resolution that will allow women inclusion in the North Shore contests.

Any women’s surfing fan will probably remember the last scene in Blue Crush where Kate Bosworth’s character goes out and secures a monster ride on the legendary surf. The sight has been the motivation for women and girls since the early 2000s, however, in 2010 the ladies of the CT were sent away in order to make more room for the men’s competition.

Do you have any opinions on this one way or the other? Who would you like to see, most, in those Pipeline barrels? Who least? May I offer a suggestion? Overlapping overlapping mixed heats. Tell me that wouldn’t set your heart on fire.

More as the story develops.

Post-apocalyptic yoga.

Now that the end is officially nigh, the lights turned out, young surfers once brimming with hope, visions of robust contracts dancing in their heads, sent outside penniless to join their snowboard brethren we can/must continue to talk about the post-apocalyptic future. Our own surf ads kicked it off so right yesterday, pointing at an aggressive bicyclist as a potential way forward. I would have liked Jen See’s take there, as she has many toes in that bike world, but will also say that Red Bull’s Rampage, a mountain bike event, is the most exciting extreme sport thing around.

In any case, some out there imagine now that funky, weird surf brands are out of the way big blue chips will come swooping in, checkbooks open wide. Lululemons pouring out millions. Banana Republics just gagging to sponsor Michel Bourez. G-Star Raw. Etc.

I think there is an assumption that these companies (save Banana Republic and G-Star Raw) are successful, have much more money than our funky, weird little surf brands and spend much more when given the opportunity.

Well, I have had the fortune of looking over a few shoulders into the business side of our surf, skate, snow game over the last decade and can say, without exception, non-endemic companies pay pennies on the dollar for professional athletes.

For all the wacky things the surf industry got wrong, it poured money back into the community. The “community” may have meant rococo surf events and parties, bloated magazines, super surf dads and their bratty little air-revo bastard kids but it was still the community. Our community. Non-endemic brands don’t care about the space. They’ll lock a talent up for as short as they possibly can for as little as they possibly can. Every single time.

So when you start seeing Lululemons and Banana Republics, Maui Jims and Men’s Warehouses affixed to boards feel very bad for the surfer riding. Not only is s/he forced into poor fashions but also quite literally poor.

Very quickly, though, who should BeachGrit sponsor in this post-apocalypse?

Who would wave our banner most wonderfully?