Aging core surfers demand: “Give us Laird Hamilton, Bruce Irons, James Duncan O’Brien for Paris 2024 Summer Olympics!”

OMG.

But now that the Aquatic Guillotine has officially been declared the site of the surfing discipline for the Paris 2024 Summer Olympic Games the fun can really begin. As you well know, surfing is making its grand Olympic debut this year in Tokyo though it is very difficult to care because Japan has small waves in the summer and whether Filipe Toledo is dancing down waist high lines or the other short Japanese surfer who won Huntington Beach’s U.S. Open of Surfing not named Kanoa Igarashi it will feel stale and/or lightly funny.

But Teahupoo. The Place of Severed Necks. Much fun and many opportunities to dust off some of our favorite surfers.

The Olympic surfing qualifying process is straight-ish forward. Each nation gets two male, two female slots which shall be earned via World Surf League standings and participation in the ISA World Surfing Games and the Pan American Games. Now, normal surfing nations like Australia, France, These United States, South Africa will fill their slots via the WSL ranks but there are hundreds of other normal-adjacent non-surfing countries like Bulgaria, Qatar, Bolivia, Iceland with not one professional behind that Wall of Positive Noise.

Again, who cares about Japan.

But Teahupoo.

And how much fun would it be for Laird Hamilton to strapped in one more time and Oh My God the world for proud little Latvia (citizenship sold for 60k Euro)?

How wonderful would it be for the great Bruce Irons to take one more swing for mighty Grenada (150k U.S.)?

Can’t you see Jamie O’Brien burning the Olympic rule book then the competition all while draped in Cambodia’s red, white and blue ($245k U.S.)?

Who else would you like to see?

Worth a crowd fun, no?

More as the story develops.