New York City, June 2020. | Photo: The Omega Man

Life and pro surfing in a post-COVID world: “Shit is bleak, bleak, bleak. The tour looks viable no more. Who will step in and take over the show once the WSL is buried in a Santa Monica ditch?”

Who gives a fuck about surfing, other than our globally dispersed splattering of non-conformists and authority-thumbers? The battle for middle America/Australia was never fought, let alone won.

So. This is where we find ourselves.

The 2020 WSL season wrapped in plastic and thrown in a ditch somewhere along Santa Monica Boulevard.

#homesurfchallenges and Russian surf bots assume its place, with E-Lo hoping nobody notices.

And nobody does, ‘cause they’re too busy tearing former comrades limb from limb, seething with incredulous rage over who should and shouldn’t be allowed to surf their shithouse local.

Meanwhile, Matt George fills the void of real surf news with stories of the time he didn’t do shrooms with Darrick Doerner and the bro from Poison on a beach in Bali.

Or was it Sam George with Jeff Hakman and the guy from Bros on a beach in Cabo?

I don’t even know anymore.

But I do know we’ve reached peak Covid, at least for this first wave.

It’s time, I think, to take a peek over the other side and wonder what professional surfing might look like in an A.C. world.

Shit is bleak.

Let’s start with the international aviation industry.

The carbon-pumping, border-opening lifeblood of the world tour.

Like a house built on the low tide mark, the WSL has benefited from decades of cost-cutting carrier companies making international travel the cheapest and most accessible it has ever been. The tour and its supporting infrastructure rely on that low water mark holding.

But the tide has turned.

Most countries have shut their borders for who knows how long. The ones that are open generally come with mandatory quarantine periods. Expect that to continue indefinitely for countries with poor health systems, i.e. the ones with all the good waves.

Carrier companies, especially the povvo cheap ones, are collapsing.

When things do come back online the price of a ticket will take a drastic hike as mandatory one seat spacings between passengers are enforced.

What will this mean for tour operating costs?

And what will the ROI be for Quey warriors flying year ‘round to chase points and meagre pay cheques?

The days of easy global travel are no more.

Then there’s the sponsor income streams.

Even before the virus industry brands were being decimated, Soviet style.

Now the cull’s looking more like a Pol Pot bloodbath.

What endemic and surf-adjacent companies will a) be left standing and b) in any position to throw the type of coin needed to rescue an already spluttering tour from its demise?

This is probably the biggest challenge the sport will face.

The Olympics and its supposed shot in the arm for surfing?

About as safe a bet as a Deivid Silva world title.

Then there’s the surfers themselves.

Across the board professional athletes are seeing their earnings cut, if they’re still lucky enough to have a sponsor.

And while the few elite ‘CT should be fine, anybody below, say, the top 16 is gonna feel the pinch.

(Is that a bad thing, though?)

Finally, who is gonna be there to help advocate for the tour when it is ready to navigate the post-Covid world?

In Australia, we’re seeing the national sports fast tracked back to competition. Thank fuck.

But that’s because they’re operating on home soil, with a large percentage of the population pushing for their return. They have solid support from corporate and government interests.

Getting them back online is a money spinner and a vote winner.

Who gives a fuck about surfing, other than our globally dispersed splattering of non-conformists and authority-thumbers?

The battle for middle America / Australia was never fought, let alone won.

Ergo, who is gonna champion surfing to the myriad of stakeholders, stretched across multiple continents, governments, jurisdictions etc, that are responsible for green lighting competition, while the effects of the worst economic crisis in over 100 years play out before them?

Shit is bleak, bleak, bleak.

The tour looks viable no more.

As laughable as it is, E-Lo’s pivot to the WSL as content farm is his only logical choice at this point. Expect the convolution of inanity and click chasing to intensify, to the point where the WSL as surfing’s peak competitive and administrative body is no longer recognisable.

It is a dead man walking.

Thing is though, I like competitive surfing.

I want it to continue.

And, I know you do too.

Who will step in and take over the show once the Woz is buried in that same Santa Monica ditch?

What is it it all gonna look like in a post covid world?

Spunky surf commenter seeking advice.

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J H
J H
6 years ago

Dane…OUTSTANDING choice, my friend. You have good taste.

J H
J H
6 years ago

True…Stevie has “Coke Nose” now which isn’t entirely attractive.

The THOT community these days is somewhat thin so I’m not sure where I’d like to go.

J H
J H
6 years ago

Can that be Stevie Nicks? Because I’d really like it to be Stevie Nicks.

J H
J H
6 years ago

Is that like the regular bus and the short bus? As someone who certainly belongs on the short bus I likely require the long pass.

J H
J H
6 years ago

What are the parameters of a hall pass?

J H
J H
6 years ago

Well excuuuuuse me, Mr. Essential Worker™️. I’m honored to have such important friends here on The Grit™️.

J H
J H
6 years ago

Yeah…but the what fuck else are you doing today??? We’re all stuck in quarantine!

J H
J H
6 years ago

Hmmmm…I’m not totally convinced. 😉

Tomas' silky smooth arms
Tomas' silky smooth arms
6 years ago

I just want what’s best for the very vulnerable VAL and SUP communities.

Nick Carroll
Nick Carroll
6 years ago

I truly really don’t think you need to worry surfads. Pretty sure the WSL will be ok. They’re saving a god damn fortune right now in contractor fees and I bet they’re busy planning the resurrection as we — well, not as we speak, but you get the drift.

Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
Greebnurt Hurkurmurgurt
6 years ago

You don’t need a camper. That’s a little excessive. #corollalife

J H
J H
6 years ago

Are you sure?

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

Yes it was a specific choice but not in the context you mean.

Hippy
Hippy
6 years ago

So I drank beer last night and while highly unusual for me, I searched for something to watch on the old desk toppy.

Taj V JF at Cloud break.

Watched it twice.

There is nothing like surfing in excellent waves. No sport can compare.

Chief Hot stuff
Chief Hot stuff
6 years ago
Reply to  Hippy

So pumping!!

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago

Hi, ‘soviet style decimation’ refers to the Russian (though originally Roman) method of capping one in every ten soldiers during purges, disciplining etc

To decimate means to lose ten per cent of something.

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
6 years ago

We’re right here!! Elo! Listen!!

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
6 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

In space.. no one can hear you scream..

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
6 years ago

Great to see less long winded personal opinion political posts again.

@surfads
@surfads
6 years ago
Reply to  NEGATRON

Felt like somebody needed to take one for the team

NEGATRON
NEGATRON
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

Oh I meant the commentary below… but yes that too now that you say it.

Waterproof Polo
Waterproof Polo
6 years ago
Reply to  @surfads

As opposed to MG’s ramblings having no definitive narrative of which to speak, you did indeed take one. I also look forward to some comps. 16 men and women, good waves (Sorry qs’ warriors). Let’s do this!

Wilbur
Wilbur
6 years ago

I’d thought I was the only one on this site that felt that way. Good on ya VONR.

joeys nosegard
joeys nosegard
6 years ago

Mate , there was this little hiccup called world war 2 less than 100 years ago.

Occ Topus
Occ Topus
6 years ago

Hmm… such a depressing article, coming from a site that touts itself as “anti-depressive”. This is uncharted territory for all of us, son. Let’s just be patient and see how it all shakes out. The world and human society are far more resilient than you seem to believe.


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